Alison Smith - Can’t See the Wood for the Trees?: Landscaping Your Life to Get Back on Track

T O M U M A N D D A D
W I T H L O V E X

CANT SEE THE WOOD FOR THE TREES?

The Landscaping Your Life process presented in the book shows us how the metaphors we use to describe our lives might be initially disempowering but then go on to stimulate creative ways out of our mental traps.

Geoff Roberts, catalyst at Hidden Resources

Landscaping Your Life is a brilliant approach, heartily recommended. Alison has extraordinary energy and an almost spooky sense of where people are and what they need. I have learned/worked/played alongside Alison for more than a decade and found her insights always useful.

Ruth Wallsgrove, management consultant

Alison and I first had the discussion about using metaphors to solve a challenge I was facing in a Warsaw restaurant a few years ago. At the time I thought, What? Give me more wine...this is uncomfortable. Then I persisted and the answer presented itself, by using the metaphor, and I was converted.

Sara Walsh Evans, managing director at The Respectory

There is nothing more invigorating than taking a step back and being challenged to view life with a different perspective. Whether it is seeing the wood for the trees, stepping out of a rut or not burying your head in the sand...all techniques outlined in this book have helped me face life head on!

Cara Murphy, head of commercial contract and supplier management

Alison is one of the best coaches I have ever had the pleasure of working with (and I've worked with a few!). She has a highly practical nature and combines it with strong intuition and unconventional tools to guide you to find insights and answers to specific challenges.... As with any transformational coaching, you need to be prepared to take responsibility for personal change and get out of your comfort zone to find the answers you need, but Alison makes this easy with her approach.

Mel Sherwood, author of The Authority Guide to Pitching Your Business

I told Alison I knew I was making a bit of a mountain out of a molehill for an issue I had, and even though I knew this, I was still stuck. She asked me questions about it, so I looked at my metaphor for the problem in a different light. She made me see that how I saw the problem was affecting my ability to do something about it.

Caroline Johnstone, author of An Introduction to the Magic of Journaling

Alison always hits the nail on the head when it comes to steering me in the right direction, whether personally or for a business issue. She is great to work with and a very positive person. I would recommend her whether you just need more clarity in your life or if you are looking for a whole new direction.

Brian Wood, owner of the Message Collective

Its too easy to get caught up in the content of a challenge were facing. That is, she said this, and I said that, and before we know it all weve done is spent hours talking ourselves into justifying why were stuck and why we cant do anything about it. With Alison as my guide, the use of landscapes as metaphors for issues Im facing has allowed me to observe the situation afresh without the oughts, shoulds and cants getting in the way. By noticing a new path, turning a real or metaphorical corner, stepping out of a rut, or cutting down some imaginary trees, solutions have emerged. More importantly, action plans developed and steps taken in a new direction.

Sufiya Gillespie, coaching client

INTRODUCTION

S ometimes when were invited to consider whats holding us back, we can find it very easy to be defensive. To jump straight in to justify our current actions, to explain why what were doing is right. To deny the rightness of the advice of others and hold on to our own beliefs, despite those beliefs contributing to our current predicament.

Obviously, this defensiveness is not a helpful behaviour when we wish to release the current stuck situation and get back on track, headed towards a new more desirable outcome.

Perhaps my ease in recognizing this defensiveness in others is due to my own relationship with this behaviour. Im on first-name terms with it, and Im particularly defensive when hearing feedback about what changes I may need to think about making. I dont want to see evidence that I might be wrong, or that I have failed in the past. I want to get there first, to make changes based on my own say-so and definitely not on someone elses.

Its as if my no one is going to tell me what to do la-la-la inner voice is turned up so loud I can hear nothing else, even at times deafening me to my own advice.

This defensiveness is there irrespective of whether those changes are related to my health, fitness, relationships, work or life more generally, and irrespective of my own personal level of expertise on the matter. Gavin, my personal trainer, can certainly testify to having to walk the tightrope Ive laid down to keep me fit and healthy, despite my controlling behaviour making his job much harder, and I suspect this frustrates him greatly. (Sorry Gavin).

Perhaps my own resistance to being told what to do is why metaphors became such a go-to tool in my own personal development. Their efficacy and success for me personally meant that I could simply use and develop them as I worked with others who are stuck and wanting desperately to find a way of getting back on track.

Metaphors get me back on track because they bypass the resistance Ive put up to being told what to do. That is, I dont have to deal with my resistance and need for control every time change is needed. Its as if the language of metaphor talks directly to the more creative part of my brain, without needing to worry the more logical part that wants to retain control at all times. The creative and perhaps more subconscious part of me hears the message, and takes appropriate action.

Instead of la-la-la we have ah-ha!

Very soon after I started to use metaphors in coaching others to get back on track, I realized nature provided a means of exploring metaphors not just in our minds but also in reality, resulting in even more powerful ah-has.

I called the process of using nature as a metaphor for our lives Landscaping Your Life.

By way of explanation, let me start by applying Landscaping Your Life to my need for control.

Trying to control your life is like trying to control the weather

Please note: as Im not a meteorologist, some of the following assumptions may be factually incorrect. In some respect, while factual data may add something to my analysis, its more important for me to notice what I notice about the weather and to apply that insight to my need for control.

Heres what I might observe as a reflection on that statement.