Caroline Foran - Own It: Make Your Anxiety Work for You

Own It.: Make Your Anxiety Work for You

Copyright 2017, 2019 Caroline Foran

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The right of Caroline Foran to be identified as the Author of the Work has been asserted by her in accordance with the Copyright, Designs, and Patents Act 1988.

Originally published in Ireland as Owning It by Hachette Books Ireland in 2017.

First published in North America by The Experiment, LLC, in 2019, by arrangement with Hachette Books UK.

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in any retrieval system or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise without the prior written permission of The Publisher.

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This book contains the opinions and ideas of its author. It is intended to provide helpful and informative material on the subjects addressed in the book. It is sold with the understanding that the author and publisher are not engaged in rendering medical, health, or any other kind of personal professional services in the book. The author and publisher specifically disclaim all responsibility for any liability, loss, or riskpersonal or otherwisethat is incurred as a consequence, directly or indirectly, of the use and application of any of the contents of this book.

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Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

Names: Foran, Caroline, author.

Title: Own it : make your anxiety work for you / Caroline Foran.

Other titles: Owning it

Description: New York : The Experiment, 2019. | Originally published in Ireland as Owning It by Hachette Books Ireland in 2017. | Includes bibliographical references.

Identifiers: LCCN 2018054470 (print) | LCCN 2018057911 (ebook)

Subjects: LCSH: Anxiety. | Fear. | Self-help techniques.

Classification: LCC BF575.A6 (ebook) | LCC BF575.A6 F67 2019 (print) | DDC 152.4/6--dc23

LC record available at https://lccn.loc.gov/2018054470

Ebook ISBN 978-1-61519-562-6

Cover design by Sarah Smith and Beth Bugler | Text design by Beth Bugler

Author photograph by Nathalie Marquez Courtney

Manufactured in the United States of America

For my main squeeze

This whole idea of curing your anxiety so that you never have to feel it againwhich plenty of books out there claim to do, preying on your vulnerabilityonly serves to make you feel worse in the long run.

DISCLAIMER 1: The first and perhaps most important point you can take from the following 250 or so pages is that I am not in any way, shape or form a healthcare professional. I dont have a degree in psychology or any qualifications that would otherwise allow me to make specific recommendations to you on how to deal with the veritable sh*t show that is your current experience of anxiety.

However, now that youve bothered to pick up this book, heres what I can offer: experience and empathy (as well as a whole lotta research).

DISCLAIMER 2: The truth is, this book wont cure your anxiety. Im sorry; you probably hated reading that; you just want to feel better (like yesterday) and I understand that, I did, too. But heres something you might not have heard before; this whole idea of curing your anxiety so that you never have to feel it againwhich plenty of books out there claim to do, preying on your vulnerabilityonly serves to make you feel worse in the long run. Watch out for that: I wasted a small fortune chasing these very same quick fixes and sensationalist claims.

What you will get from this book is the understanding voice of someone whos felt as crap as you do now and, like you, has no time for BS or overly technical jargon that makes everything sound a whole lot scarier than it needs to be. Anxiety, by its very nature, is disconcerting enough; this book aims to keep things simple and break down what anxiety is so that you can regain control.

The main aim of this bookand what I want to get you thinking about before we dive right inis the idea of OWNING your anxiety so that it no longer negatively impacts your life.

This book is about changing your relationship with your anxiety. Though your instincts right now are telling you otherwise, the key is not to resist it. Not to run a million miles away from it. Not to cure it. But to learn the art of managing it.

Anxiety is something we will all encounter at some point in our lives; some of us just feel it more than others. As for those whom you look at enviously, wondering how they go through life so seemingly carefree, perhaps it will be just a matter of time before anxiety rears its ugly head for them tooor maybe theyre already feeling it on the inside and you just dont know it.

You see, theres no stereotypical or easily identifiable anxiety sufferer. We dont walk around breathing erratically into brown paper bags or set our Facebook status to anxious for all the world to see. Though its far from the upbeat perspective youre looking for, stress and anxiety are nearly impossible to avoid in the twenty-first century, and the last thing I want to do is tell you how to live a stress-free and anxiety-free life. I tried that, as many have, but it doesnt work; its futile. You just end up feeling frustrated and more anxious, and all that improves is your self-help book collection.

Thankfully, though, what is possible is managing anxiety and, better still, making it work for you, whatever your age.

Throughout Own It, I will chronicle my own experience of anxietya lot of which youll no doubt recognize in yourselfand I will share the most practical and positive tools that can help you feel like you again. When youre right in the thick of it or plummeting deep down into the abyss, which is how a bad bout of anxiety can feel, its hard to imagine that therell ever be a time when you wont feel untethered or unable to cope. My aim here is to reassure you that you will. Youll fly it.

So, youre probably wondering, now that I no longer feel defined by my anxietyor the need to introduce myself with a warning, like: Hello, Im an anxious person and I might, at any moment, burst into flameswhy would I want to drag it all up again? Why dont I just go on living my life to the fullest without giving too much oxygen to a bad experience? The thing is, I know for sure that my own anxiety wouldnt have been anywhere near as traumatic if I had known then what I know now. And with so many people starting to come out of the woodwork and admit that they, too, dont feel so good, I want to share my learningsgood and badso that you can also pull yourself out of that initial black hole of despair and learn to cope. Most importantly, though, I want to be honest and to the point, as I believe this will save you time, money and any further, unnecessary suffering.

You see, when my anxiety hit me like a big fat freight train that I just did not see coming, I was desperate to talk to someone who