Lucy Harrison - Soft Skills for Tough Jobs

Learning NALED has fundamentally changed the way I lead. It opened me up and made me question my internal behaviours, and the way I behaved with my team. Applying it has helped me open up and be more curious, and helped me stop shooting people down.

I used to say the right things, do everything I was asked but be physically and emotionally distant. People sensed a lack of engagement from me. I now have better, more personal connection with my team and peers, which is creating deeper trust and being more productive.

Rob, IT

I cant begin to tell you what a difference using NALED has already made in my world. Ive been using it in my conversations at work and it has thrown up some underlying tensions and issues that I was not yet aware of. On top of that I personally feel more involved with each of those people, so I am motivated to make changes to help them. Im noticing a difference both in me and with the information level I am receiving.

Janet, Operations

These arent just soft skills; they are life skills. My daughter called in a panic to say her boyfriend was dealing with a major home issue. I told her to bring him here. Prior to learning about NALED, I would have probably told him to man up and gone for a beer. Instead I sat with him and listened. I heard him whilst he cried, I acknowledged his situation and just listened. After an hour and a half you could see his shoulders drop and his face clear. It made a real difference in his life. My wife and daughter were surprised and proud of me too.

Phil, Director

I practised this recently in a meeting with a group of stakeholders who were unhappy about the project and where its at. Instead of arguing the points with them as I would have usually done, I held a listening forum. I heard what they had to say. This has resulted in better conversations and them being more bought into what we are trying to achieve and why.

Jared, Major Projects

NALED really resonated with me as a GP of many years. Ive realized this is what I do in my successful consultations with patients. I have evolved my style over the years as I unconsciously recognized that if I dont approach my patients in this way, the consultation will fail, and I am much more likely to miss both the patients agenda and important information to aid diagnosis. Now I have the explicit framework I can be more conscious about it.

Dr Collier, GP

I have just started in a new team and have been using the NALED techniques to be more intentional; focusing, listening and asking careful questions. It is drawing more information out of people, resulting in better preparation for the meetings. I am getting the information I need for my reports in the meeting rather than having to chase people afterwards, so it is making my life easier and making me more respected and effective in role.

Christine, Maintenance

The main impact on me has been my awareness of my own reaction to people around me. Ive learnt not to pre-judge problems as they walk through the door. Im now aware and conscious that Ive done that in the past. Learning NALED has has helped me allow people to open up first.

Mary, Security

At home I have had a situation with my best friend. Hes always been life and soul of the party very different to me. But he told me last week that he is suffering from depression. Badly. NALED has given me a way of handling my own deep emotions and a way of holding a caring, compassionate conversation with him. Hes got a long way to go, but he knows I am on his side and have the ability to just shut up and listen. This is life-changing stuff.

Paul, Major Projects

In my work as an engineer, it is amazing how infrequently different departments talk to each other to resolve joint issues. I end up getting praised for pulling the teams together by simply holding NALED conversations. It shouldnt be that easy to get praise, but when no one else does it, then it seems like a big deal.

Gary, Engineering

I am trying to use NALED on a regular basis. I am finding that the more I try to empower the team, the better the team responds and the more effectively we are delivering for the customer. I am also working my way through my social capital map, trying to ensure those connections are maintained and improved.

Mark, Director

Just because we go to work, it doesnt mean we all switch our emotions off and become machines. If were going to truly make a change, we have to remember that a business is a complex mechanism its organic, it relies on people sometimes even the seemingly irrational. But focusing on people is essential to delivering the needed change. NALED has given me the how to do this.

Steve, Systems

In progress meetings, instead of telling people what they should be doing, I now ask my team what they are going to do next and Notice, Acknowledge and Listen to their response. It is less work for me and results in better engagement.

Michelle, Construction

I would love to hear your stories too, do share them with me at

The illustrations are by Bekah Funning.

NALED is a registered Trademark.

First published in Great Britain by Practical Inspiration Publishing, 2022

Lucy Harrison, 2022

The moral rights of the author have been asserted

All rights reserved. This book, or any portion thereof, may not be reproduced without the express written permission of the author.

Every effort has been made to trace copyright holders and to obtain their permission for the use of copyright material. The publisher apologizes for any errors or omissions and would be grateful if notified of any corrections that should be incorporated in future reprints or editions of this book.

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