Terry Hershey - This Is the Life: Mindfulness, Finding Grace, and the Power of the Present Moment

Chapter One

Dancing with Manatees

I am convinced that it is not the fear of death, of our lives ending, that haunts our sleep so much as the fear that as far as the world is concerned, we might as well never have lived.HAROLD KUSHNER

If you must look back, do so forgivingly. If you must look forward, do so prayerfully. However, the wisest thing you can do is be present in the present...gratefully.MAYA ANGELOU

You never know what youre going to encounter en route. [So, now] I dont miss a thing. I touch everything.ANDY MERRIFIELD

They tell us to live one day at a timeas if we had a choice. Two, three days at a time? Of course, all of us live one day at a time. Some of us are just more aware of it.TOM BRAZAITIS

N ot that long ago, I danced with manatees. Lord have mercy, it was good. I was in Manasota Key, Florida, my annual May gathering with my friends of thirty-five years. We swap stories and talk about the way the world would be if we were in charge. On the Intracoastal Waterway, near a congregation of mangrove trees, we anchor the boat and spend an afternoon floating, buoyed in the water, a treat for those of us who are escaping winters chill. The sky is dyed hope-blue, and egrets pose graceful and elegant in the mangroves.

Manatees are curious and unafraid of humans. They are gentle, docile, and friendly. So, without announcement, they swim near and around you, to check out the visitors to their world. One manatee swam under my feet, literally lifting me up, as if to welcome me. Oh my.

This is a first for me. I had heard stories. And yet, no mental framing prepares you. I do know this; in that moment, as my laughter echoes in the mangrove trees, as the cares of my day dissipate, I am fully awake and fully alive. My senses are grounded to this sacrament. This present moment. This gift. This clarity. This permission to savor life now goes with me into my day.

So, I wonder, why are there too many days when I miss the gift?

In letters written in 1740, Jean-Pierre de Caussade (ordained member of the Society of Jesus) wrote about the sacrament of the present moment. We are invited to choose to live each day as a sacrament (as a gift), enabling us to see, to hear, to taste, and to touch gracethe goodness of Gods presence in our world. We need to bring this sacrament back and allow it to be front and center in our lives. Im pretty sure that St. Francis would agree. Franciscan spirituality is an incarnational earthy spirituality. Put simply: God is close, never far away.

I live on an island in the Pacific Northwest, a long way from manatees, but that doesnt stop me from dancing with them. Every day. If only in my mind. Dancing with manatees is my shibboleth, inviting me to live and savor the sacrament of the present. And I invite you to do the same.

Whenever we broach the subject of spirituality or spiritual growth or emotional well-being, our knee-jerk petition is predictable, Please tell us how. After all, there must be a list, right?

Which takes my mind to a story.

My son Zach is six, we are taking a break, sitting on the bench in front of Bobs Bakery (Bobs is Vashon Islands morning gathering spot). Were having Cinnamon Twists. They are decadently yummy, and make me forget my need to be useful. The bench is made from a trunk of an old downed log, its seat now worn from years of time and use. Zach and I watch the Vashon traffictraffic in a poetic license sort of waygo by. And Zach, his mouth full of half a Twist, says, Dad, this is the life.

Life is full of beauty. Notice it, Ashley Smith writes. Notice the bumble bee, the small child, and the smiling faces. Smell the rain, and feel the wind. Live your life to the fullest potential, and fight for your dreams.

Really, Terry, this is your list?

Do you remember the Road to Emmaus story? After the resurrection, Jesus joins two disciples walking a pathway. They are crestfallen that, after his death, Jesus has vanished; they are hoping for clarification about their sorrow. Please explain, they say to Jesus. They ask questions. And Jesus tells them stories. Except they dont realize it is Jesus.

It was after walking, and after the explanation, when Jesus sits down to break bread and to eat with them that their eyes opened. And they see. After Jesus departs, they say to one another, Did not our hearts burn within us? The gift, the clarity, the permission to see and to savor now accompanies them into their day.

Sadly, my religious upbringing didnt teach me about savoring and loving this life. And my church most certainly didnt teach me to dance with manatees. (Not to mention that in our lexicon, dancing was most assuredly a sin.) Raised Baptist in Southern Michigan, I was taught to value my faith. To live as if it mattered. And my life did matter, as a belief. As a creed. Well, more like a security card. Like a hall pass for eternity.

I was raised in a tradition that sang lustily, This world is not my home, Im just a-passing through. Saving up credits for heavens golden streets and all that. I was asked persistently by concerned adult church members, If you were to die tonight, do you know if you would spend eternity in heaven? Ill give you a hint, youd want to answer Yes because it saved consternation, and a mini-sermon.

As an adult, I realize now, looking back, that no one ever asked me, If you were to live today, how would you savor this gift youve been given? If you were to live today, how would you embrace this sacrament of the present moment? If you were to live today, tell me, would you dance with manatees?

Heres what I do now know: When we stop the noise, the distraction, the compulsion to perform, the fear of rejection, we make (meaning allow) space to practice this new sacrament.

The first-grade class assignment: to name the seven wonders of the world. Each student compiles a list, and shares that list, aloud, with the class. There is ardent interaction as the students call out entries from their lists: the Pyramids, the Empire State Building, the Amazon River, Yellowstone National Park, the Grand Canyon, the Taj Mahal and the list goes on. The teacher serves the role of cheerleader, Class, these are great answers. Well done!

One girl sits silent. She is asked about her list. She says, I dont think I understand the assignment.

Why?

I dont have any of the right answers, she tells the teacher. Well, why dont you tell us what you wrote on your paper, and well help you? the teacher encourages her.

OK, says the little girl, I think the seven wonders of the world are to see, to hear, to taste, to touch, to smell, to love, to belong.

Somewhere along the way, we have buried this little girls wisdom.

With these seven wonders, we make the choice to be open, available, curious and willing to be surprised by joy. We know there is power in the word enough. We carry this capacity to honor the present into every encounter and relationship, meaning that we honor the dignity that is reflected by Gods goodness and grace. Every encounter, every relationship, is a place to include, invite mercy, encourage, receive, heal, reconcile, repair, say thank you, pray, celebrate, refuel, and restore.

A seminary student body participated in a day of recollection and reflection. As the seminary president introduced the guest retreat leaderon a beautiful Saturday morning in springhe apologized to the seminarians, Im very sorry for the distraction and the noise.

This Saturdayon the seminary grounds sports fieldhappened to be youth soccer day. It seems that the president had forgotten to arrange for the local youth soccer program to play their games elsewhere on the day of the retreat. Hundreds of children were on the seminary grounds, and the sounds of play and laughter could easily be heard, echoing and reverberating inside the lecture hall.