Patricia Spadaro - Honor Yourself: The Inner Art of Giving and Receiving

Praise for

HONOR YOURSELF

Winner of the Nautilus Silver Book Award
and the National Indie Excellence Book Award

Patricia Spadaro is a marvelous guide through the inner realms of the heart. I always feel uplifted by her words.

Marianne Williamson, #1 New York Times bestselling author of A Return to Love

Honor Yourself is more than just food for the soulit is true healing for the heart. Patricia Spadaro provides an honest approach to self-love that will help us overcome the mental and emotional roadblocks that have created imbalances in our lives today.... She is a new voice to be reckoned with as a pioneer in healing.

Ann Louise Gittleman, Ph.D. C.N.S., New York Times bestselling author of The Fat Flush Plan

A tightly woven guide to achieving inner peace.

Publishers Weekly

With stories from the wisdom traditions of East and West, personal anecdotes, and the experiences of contemporary people as they explore the art of giving and receiving, Spadaro illuminates ways to celebrate ones gifts and greatness, to appreciate the wisdom of the heart, set adequate boundaries, recognize and deal with unhealthy relationships, and honor necessary endings.... Engaging, compassionate, and at times, surprising.

ForeWord magazine

If you happen to be someone in need of a good book in a bad time, then youve just met this seasons must-read.

Good Books in Bad Times (HarperOne blog)

A compendium of insight, advice, and practicality within the context of modern life, Honor Yourself is highly recommended for personal self-help, self-improvement reading lists as being especially user friendly and real world oriented for establishing and maintaining mentally, physically, and spiritually appropriate balances between the needs of others and the needs of oneself.

Midwest Book Review

Rich in insight and practical wisdom, this wonderful book is an essential guide to making the choices that are right for you. It will touch your heart, move your spirit, and propel you forward. We highly recommend this exceptional book.

New York Times bestselling author Dannion Brinkley and Kathryn Brinkley, authors of Secrets of the Light

Having the ability to balance the needs of life, family and a career are always a challenge. This book shows us how to embrace our feelings, recognize the paradox of life and embrace the acceptance and support that is all around us.

Awareness Magazine

Rarely does a debut solo work of nonfiction explode on the scene with such deftness and clarity.... What makes any book great, from Dostoyevsky to Tolle, is when the reader pauses every so often to ponder what he has just read. This is just what I found myself doing from chapter to chapter.

ReverseSpins.com

Offers wise counsel on giving birth to your best self.

Frederic and Mary Ann Brussat, SpiritualityandPractice.com

Patricia Spadaros book is essential reading. In searching the wisdom of our planet from the oldest truths to the most modern sayings, Patricia extinguishes the fires of myth that have held us in bondage to tension and stress.... Her writing is a breath of fresh air.

Chris Prentiss, author of Zen and the Art of Happiness and Be Who You Want, Have What You Want

Patricia Spadaros elegant writing takes us exactly where we need to be, on the journey inward.... A must-read for everyone who struggles with balance: executives, stay-at-home moms, politicians, celebrities, and anyone who works hard and wants to live fully.

Iris Martin, psychotherapist and author of From Couch to Corporation, The Presidents Psychoanalyst, and Mortgage Wars

H O N O R Y O U R S E L F

H O N O R Y O U R S E L F

T h e I N N E R A R T o f

G I V I N G a n d R E C E I V I N G

Embracing the power
of paradox in your life

P A T R I C I A S P A D A R O

T H R E E W I N G S P R E S S

Copyright 2009 Patricia Spadaro. All rights reserved. Printed in the United States of America. No part of this book may be used, reproduced, translated, electronically stored, or transmitted in any manner whatsoever without prior written permission from the publisher, except by reviewers, who may quote brief passages in their reviews.

For information, address:

Three Wings Press
410 Fieldstone Drive
Bozeman, MT 59715
E-mail:

For foreign and translation rights, contact Nigel J. Yorwerth.
E-mail:

Library of Congress Control Number: 2008910202

ISBN: 978-0-9816033-0-8 (paperback)
ISBN: 978-0-9816033-1-5 (eBook)

10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3

Cover design: Roger Gefvert
Interior design: James Bennett

The names and some details of the stories used throughout this book have been changed to protect the privacy of those who have shared their lessons on lifes path. The information and insights in this book are solely the opinion of the author and should not be considered as a form of therapy, advice, direction, diagnosis, and/or treatment of any kind. This information is not a substitute for medical, psychological, or other professional advice, counseling, or care. All matters pertaining to your individual health should be supervised by a physician or appropriate health-care practitioner. Neither the author nor the publisher assumes any responsibility or liability whatsoever on behalf of any purchaser or reader.

C O N T E N T S

CELEBRATE YOURSELF AND
HONOR YOUR OWN VOICE

FOR SELF-REFLECTION

KEYS TO THE BALANCING ACT

To the sages of East and West,

who have taught me that the greatest gift

I can give anyone is the gift of myself

FILL YOURSELF and
HONOR YOUR INNER NEEDS

You can look the whole world over and never find
anyone more deserving of love than yourself.

THE BUDDHA

W hile we are called to give, and to give joyfully, life also beckons us to master the art of balance. We have a duty not just to give to others, but to give to ourselvesand to see ourselves as worthy of receiving. We have a duty to honor others and to honor ourselves. What makes it so hard? Weve inherited deep-seated myths about giving that keep us tied up in a lopsided approach to living. Its like trying to walk a tightrope in a straitjacket; were not free to move a little this way or that to regain our balance. There is a way out of the dilemma, a way beyond the myths to the magic of honoring ourselves. It begins where all wisdom startsthrough the door of paradox.

C H A P T E R 1

THE PLAY of PARADOX

Do I contradict myself?
Very well then I contradict myself,
(I am large, I contain multitudes.)

WALT WHITMAN

Life is rarely, if ever, an either/or equation. In principle and in practice, life is full of contradictionparadox. It is a balancing act between competing tensions that vie for our time, our energy, and our attention, trying desperately to convince us that we must choose one over the other.