Preston Yancey - Tables in the Wilderness: A Memoir of God Found, Lost, and Found Again

This book is a gift to readers, to the Church, and to the spiritual memoir genre. Preston Yancey writes with stunning clarity, wisdom, and grace, and with this debut sets himself apart as one of the finest writers of faith of our time.

RACHEL HELD EVANS

I dont know exactly what it is about Prestons writing, but you manage to find a million points of connection no matter how your spiritual path has meandered.... As you turn the very last page, your soul is yearning for God, and you know that he will be found.

JEN HATMAKER, author of Interrupted and 7: An Experimental Mutiny against Excess

Prestons writing is simply gorgeous: clear, elegant, full of emotional honesty. I loved the experiences of curling up with these pages.

SHAUNA NIEQUIST, author of Bread & Wine

As a theologian, Preston is in his own category. Hes ancient and modern and skips all the made-up mess in between.... He is brilliant, and this book is a prayer that he has prayed for all of us.

GLENNON DOYLE MELTON, author of the New York Times bestseller Carry On, Warrior, and the founder of Momastery.com

Many preach grace Preston practices grace. He loves well and his words engage and dissect the human soul with the precision of a master surgeon.

JENNIE ALLEN, founder of IF Gathering and author of Restless

Preston Yancey is an old soul Im allowed to say that because Im older than he is, but actually Im humbled and proud to call him a teacher.

TSH OXENREIDER, author of Notes From a Blue Bike: The Art of Living Intentionally in a Chaotic World

I loved this conflicted, honest, and beautifully written book.

SARAH BESSEY, author of Jesus Feminist

Tables in the Wilderness is a full and rich exploration of the still, quiet, transformative presence of God. Full of wit, wisdom, and emotional gravity, it is a beautiful, spellbinding read from the first word to the last.

SETH HAINES, editor, deeperstory.com

Journey with Preston Yancey into the bewildering, silent wilderness in this poignant, honest, coming-of-spiritual-age memoir.

MICHELLE DERUSHA, author of Spiritual Misfit: A Memoir of Uneasy Faith

Preston Yancey deftly explores the intersections of Gods voice and his silence, between knowledge and mystery, between brokenness and wholeness. His story is deeply personal, yet shot through with wisdom, theology, liturgy, and quiet.

ADDIE ZIERMAN, author of When We Were on Fire: A Memoir of Consuming Faith, Tangled Love, and Starting Over

Prestons book reads like a carefully crafted novel, replete with unexpected twists that will captive audiences. It is a tale of someone with enough spiritual chops to ask difficult questions about God and life. Read it and uncover a faith worth believing.

JONATHAN MERRITT, author of Jesus Is Better Than You Imagined; senior columnist for Religion News Service

If you know the sound of the silence of God, wrestle to cease striving, and play at spirituality, read Tables in the Wilderness. Read it and feel invited in the direction of joy, into the Presence.

AMBER C. HAINES, blogger at therunamuck and upcoming author with Revell

There are frankly not many contemporary spiritual memoirs anywhere nearly this good (nor this honest).

JONATHAN MARTIN, author of Prototype and founder of Renovatus: A Church for People Under Renovation

Its been a long time since Ive read something so beautifully written.

NISH WEISETH, author of Speak: How Your Story Can Change the World, and editor-in-chief, deeperstory.com

Know Preston Yancey for even five minutes, and youll find yourself longing for a seat next to him around any dinner table.... Tables in the Wilderness is a literary morsel to be savored for sure.

LOGAN WOLFRAM, Executive Director, Allume

Tables in the Wilderness illuminates the simple but essential truth that our place at Gods table is that of a welcome and beloved guest, being served a feast not of our design but for our delight.

KAREN SWALLOW PRIOR, author of Booked: Literature in the Soul of Me and Fierce Convictions: The Extraordinary Life of Hannah More Poet, Reformer, Abolitionist

ZONDERVAN

Tables in the Wilderness

Copyright 2014 by Preston Yancey

ePub Edition August 2014: ISBN 978-0-310-33885-7

Requests for information should be addressed to:

Zondervan, 3900 Sparks Dr. SE, Grand Rapids, Michigan 49546

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

Yancey, Preston, 1989

Tables in the wilderness : a memoir of God found, lost, and found again / Preston Yancey. 1st [edition].

pages cm

ISBN 978-0-310-33882-6 (hardcover)

ISBN 978-0-310-34122-2 (softcover)

1. Yancey, Preston, 1989- 2. Christian biography United States. I. Title.

BR1725.Y36A3 2014

277.3'083092 dc23

[B]

2014011391

All Scripture quotations, unless otherwise indicated, are taken from The Holy Bible, New International Version, NIV. Copyright 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.

Any Internet addresses (websites, blogs, etc.) and telephone numbers in this book are offered as a resource. They are not intended in any way to be or imply an endorsement by Zondervan, nor does Zondervan vouch for the content of these sites and numbers for the life of this book.

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means electronic, mechanical, photocopy, recording, or any other except for brief quotations in printed reviews, without the prior permission of the publisher.

Cover design: James Hall

Cover photo: Getty Images / Shutterstock

Interior design: Katherine Lloyd, The DESK

First Printing August 2014

For Hilary
The first time I kiss my wife...

To Sam, Grant, Antonia, and Jerry

Best friend isnt a person, Danny.

Its a tier.

Mindy Kaling

CONTENTS

by Jefferson Bethke

The answer of course, is that the clock isnt meant to measure earthly time, but the time of the soul. Redemption and condemnation time. For the soul, each instant is always a minute short of judgment.

Gregory Maguire, Wicked: The Life and Times of the Wicked Witch of the West

Gregory of Nyssa points out that Mosess vision of God began with the light, with the visible burning bush, the bush which was bright with fire and was not consumed; but afterwards, God spoke to him in a cloud. After the glory which could be seen with human eyes, he began to see the glory which is beyond and after light. The shadows are deepening all around us.

Madeleine LEngle, A Circle of Quiet

Because once someone dared

to want you,

I know that we, too, may want you.