First English translation copyright 2020 by Skyhorse Publishing, Inc.
Published by arrangement with Loewe Verlag GmbH.
Title of the original German edition: Was mach ich nur mit meiner Trauer?
2018 Loewe Verlag GmhH, Bindlach
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Manufactured in China, October 2019
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Cover provided by Loewe Verlag GmbH
Cover illustration by Dagmar Geisler
Print ISBN: 978-1-5107-4658-9
Ebook ISBN: 978-1-5107-4669-5
There are many reasons
why someone can be sad.
What does it feel like to be sad?
I feel like I have
I just feel
I have to cry all
swallowed a heavy stone.
weighed down.
the time.
Im so angry
And I am
I feel quite cold, even
because I am sad.
constantly
when the sun is
hungry.
shining outside.
And I would love
to scream very loudly.
It feels like I
have a stomachache.
And then I
have no desire
to do anything.
Every person is sad in their own way.
Everyone can experience it differently.
And it doesnt always feel the same
every time youre sad, either.
There many ways to be sad.
There is no wrong way.
A couple of questions that can help you:
What is the reason for my grief?
Is my sadness big or small?
Is there only one reason for it or are there maybe more?
Do I need someone to comfort me?
Or would I rather be alone?
Would it be easier if I tell someone whats making me sad?
Whom should I tell? Mom or Dad? Or maybe just my stuffed animal?
Is there anything that would help me feel better now? Maybe a hot
chocolate or a nice story? Or an afternoon snuggled on the couch or
playing a game outdoors, in the fresh air... ?
Can you think of any other questions you can ask yourself?
One event that makes
people sad is losing a loved one.
Everything that lives must at some point
die; this is our life cycle, and its per-
fectly normal. Thats what happens
with flowers that bloom in summer.
In autumn, they hang their heads.
At this time, leaves on the trees
sail to the ground and then
winter comes.
The wind
carries away
the seeds
A seed
grows in
the earth
Water
We know that in spring, new flowers grow and
that trees become green again. But if we
loved this particular flower so, it makes
us sad nevertheless.
We human beings, of course,
live much longer than flowers.
And we make memories
throughout the years.
A bud
New
seeds
The dead
leaves
return to
the earth
Sun
Great-grandma
as a kid
This is a long
time ago:
Great-grandma
during the harvest
But at some point, every person must go.
Like, for example, Maries great-grandmother. She had almost
turned one hundred years old and was on this earth way back
when most people drove horse-drawn carriages. The railway then
ran on steam and almost nobody had a telephone. Such a nice,
long life she had, people said.
However, Marie was very sad when she died. She was very, very
fond of her great-grandmother.
Sometimes people pass away
before they grow old, perhaps
because they were ill or because
they were in an accident. If you
know the person and they
have a place in your heart, the
sadness is almost unbearable.
It hurts a lot, and it may feel as if
this pain will never go away.
I cant stand it!!!
It hurts
so much!
This is the case for everyone who experiences these things. In the moment, it
feels like we will never stop feeling such great sorrow. But thats the way it is.
For some, it takes a while, and for others, it takes less time. As you know,
everyone is different. And this is especially true when it comes to grief.
Some just want to
some would like
cry and cry...
to cry but cant.
Some just want to
There are a few
be left alone...
who prefer not to
do anything.
and still others cant
be alone during this time.
Some want to be
taken into anothers
arms...
others we
shouldnt touch.
Others prefer to go
for long walks.
Some busy
themselves
with work.
Just remember: there are many
ways to be sad and each is fine!
Some just
sit there and
dont want
to eat, drink,
or talk.
At some point,
the terrible sorrow
lessens. Then you
begin to think more of
the nice things that you have
experienced with this person.
Marie remembers, for example, the way her
great-grandmother sang Pop Goes the Weasel
and how she sat on the bench and could say the
names of all the flowers and animals. And now Marie
knows that there is such a thing as a cuckoo flower and a
butterfly called a small tortoiseshell.
And when she sees all these things, then she is happy and feels as
though her great-grandmother is nearby. And her great-grandmother
would have been so happy to see her great-granddaughter so joyful.
No one who loves you would want you to be
sad forever.
When youre down, you could sing softly and
laugh and goof around. Thats totally alright.
A butterfly with
a tortoiseshell?
Pop Goes
the Weasel
Cuckoo
Flower
Thats true!
My great-grandma
always wanted me
to tell her jokes.
She didnt know the
latest ones.
Do you
want to
hear one?
Wood
anemones
Tortoiseshell
Butterfly
At first, when the pain is still so bad that you can hardly stand it, its
good to have a few things you can rely on. These recurring activities
are called:
These also happen at some nice events: blowing