Brenda Jackson - My Story and How Gods Grace Saved Me

My Story

and How

Gods

Grace

Saved

ME

Trilogy Christian Publishers

A Wholly Owned Subsidiary of Trinity Broadcasting Network

2442 Michelle Drive

Tustin, CA 92780

Copyright 2019 by Brenda Jackson

All Scripture quotations, unless otherwise noted, taken from THE HOLY BIBLE, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION, NIV Copyright 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.

Scripture quotations marked (KJV) taken from The Holy Bible, King James Version. Cambridge Edition: 1769.

All rights reserved, including the right to reproduce this book or portions thereof in any form whatsoever.

For information, address Trilogy Christian Publishing

Rights Department, 2442 Michelle Drive, Tustin, Ca 92780.

Trilogy Christian Publishing/ TBN and colophon are trademarks of Trinity Broadcasting Network.

For information about special discounts for bulk purchases, please contact Trilogy Christian Publishing.

Manufactured in the United States of America

Trilogy Disclaimer: The views and content expressed in this book are those of the author and may not necessarily reflect the views and doctrine of Trilogy Christian Publishing or the Trinity Broadcasting Network.

10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data is available.

ISBN 978-1-64088-533-2 (print)

ISBN 978-1-64088-534-9 (ebook)

Dedication

In memory of

My mother, Elnora Tyler Jackson, and my brothers, George E. Jackson and Henry L. Jackson

Rest in peace

Preface

While I was writing this book, not by my power but through God, all things have been made possible in order for this book to be produced. I acknowledge that I am nothing without Christ as the head of my life. He graciously used me for His glory through the development of this book. I am not writing this in my own strength; God stirred my heart to write this book to encourage His people, who are hurting today. We are everything in the kingdom of God, but in our society, people are made to feel powerless and unworthy. God loves us and places within us a spiritual awakening, but we must trust our Almighty God and His truth to be able to endure and overcome all obstacles in life.

Acknowledgments

First of all, I would like to give thanks to God, my family, and to everyone who gave me words of wisdom: including Pastor Farmer; Sister Sherry Farmer and the spiritual support of their congregation; Mrs. Felice Brown, a motivational speaker; all other prayer partners; and some television ministries.

I would also like to thank that patient that God placed in my path to push me to pursue His calling for my life (God rest her soul).

Introduction

Let me begin by saying thanks be to God, for it was by His grace that wisdom and knowledge was given to me in order to write this book. Others may not realize how difficult life has been for me, but through Gods loving grace, I have made it to where I am today.

This book is based on situations that I have gone through and faced during my lifetime that could have destroyed me. God has brought me through many obstacles in which I know only His Grace has protected, guided, and provided me the strength I needed to endure them.

This book is not written just for women; it is intended for anyone needing and seeking peace within themselves. You must allow God and His loving grace to open up your inner self and encourage you to receive the truth in His wisdom and the knowledge that gives you fulfillment within.

The Beginning

I am the vine, ye are the branches: He that abideth in me, and I in him, the same bringeth forth much fruit: for without me ye can do nothing.

John 15:5

(KJV)

The developmental stages of my teenage years and well into young adulthood was a self-destructing time of my life. I was spiraling out of control smoking cigarettes, drinking, and smoking pot. This is what I considered life being all about: Im cool and hanging out with friends, and no one can tell me anything . While I thought I was being cool, I started selling drugs. I thought that I was big and bold enough to do anything a man could do, but even better. I hung out with a lot of guys because I was a tomboy at heart. My life was so amazing to me, or so I thought. If the guys were pimping, I figured I could pimp too. Fear was nothing to me. A fight was nothing to me. Being shot at was nothing to me. There wasnt anything or anybody that scared me.

This lifestyle went on for a few years; I dropped out of high school in the eleventh grade and figured this is what the cool people do. My thoughts were there is no time for school when I was engaged in other things I had going on in my life at that time . In the midst of all the destruction I was involved in, my parents always sent us to church that held traditional services during my teenage years. My parents did not realize that this was not helping me at this point in my life.

As I got older, my life changed from selling drugs and thinking of ways to cheat men out of their money to something much worse. I began hanging out with individuals who made really fast money, and a lot of it. They were tampering with vehicles, which I knew did not belong to them, but the goods brought in lots of money. Oh boy! This is what it took to effectively scare me to go straight.

One or two policemen didnt frighten me any, but when youre facing several different police teams along with some flatbed trucks towing away everything youre foolish enough to think is yours, but truthfully belongs to someone else; this type of police attention will slap you back into reality. Everything began to go downhill from there.

Emotionally, I was a wreck. I had no money and no idea how to begin my life over again. Depression began to set inside of me, and anger took over. I became numb; almost as if I was dead on the inside.

With the lifestyle that I lived; I was already labeled as the crazy girl who will curse you at the drop of a hat! Well, that got even worse if you said anything to me that was out of line. You are going to get the best curse I could give you.

The Struggle Within

Blessed are ye, when men shall hate you, and when they shall separate you from their company, and

shall reproach you, and cast out your name as evil, for the Son of mans sake. Rejoice ye in that day, leap for joy: for, behold, your reward is great in heaven: for in the like manner did their fathers unto the prophet.

Luke 6:2223

(KJV)

My understanding of where my life was headed made no sense to me; none whatsoever. I didnt understand how to grasp control over my life. Everything seemed to be so distant and out of reach for me, or so I thought. I fought battles within myself on a daily basis; but I knew there was more to life than what I had or didnt have, and I yearned for change.

During the time of all the challenges and trouble in my life, I had my son at the age of twenty-two, and the following year, I had my daughter. Life continued to be a struggle, especially with two children and trying to keep them protected from the demonic oppositions that I was facing.

It truly amazes me of the manner in which God protected and guided my life. My living arrangements were not the best, but I was always provided with housing in some of the worst government-approved apartment complexes anyone could imagine. God faithfully placed a shield of protection around my children and me, while he maintained our living condition and gave provision for my family.