Thom S. Rainer - The Unchurched Next Door: Understanding Faith Stages as Keys to Sharing Your Faith

To the boys of Christian Academy of Louisville,

who have brought so much joy and laughter to the Rainer home

for the past nine years.

And always to

Nellie Jo,

Gods gift of a wife to me.

Other Books by Thom S. Rainer

The Unexpected Journey

Breakout Churches

Surprising Insights from the Unchurched and Proven Ways to Reach Them

High Expectations

The Everychurch Guide to Growth (coauthor)

The Bridger Generation

Effective Evangelistic Churches

The Church Growth Encyclopedia (coeditor)

Experiencing Personal Revival (coauthor)

Giant Awakenings

Biblical Standards for Evangelists (coauthor)

Eating the Elephant

The Book of Church Growth

Evangelism in the Twenty-First Century (editor)

Thom S. Rainer (PhD, Southern Baptist Theological Seminary) is president and CEO of LifeWay Christian Resources in Nashville, Tennessee. He was founding dean of the Billy Graham School of Missions, Evangelism and Church Growth at The Southern Baptist Theological Seminary. His many books include Surprising Insights from the Unchurched, TheUnexpected Journey,and Breakout Churches.

ZONDERVAN

THE UNCHURCHED NEXT DOOR

Copyright 2003 by Thom S. Rainer

All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. By payment of the required fees, you have been granted the non-exclusive, non-transferable right to access and read the text of this e-book on-screen. No part of this text may be reproduced, transmitted, down-loaded, decompiled, reverse engineered, or stored in or introduced into any information storage and retrieval system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereinafter invented, without the express written permission of Zondervan.

ePub Edition January 2009 ISBN: 978-0-310-31577-3

Requests for information should be addressed to:

Zondervan, Grand Rapids, Michigan 49530

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

Rainer, Thom S.

The unchurched next door : understanding faith stages as keys to sharing your faith / Thom

S. Rainer.

p. cm.

Includes bibliographical references and indexes.

ISBN-13: 978-0-310-28612-7

1. Non church-affiliated people. 2. Evangelistic work. I. Title.

BV4921.3.R35 2003

269'.2dc21

20030100040

All Scripture quotations, unless otherwise indicated, are taken from the Holy Bible: New International Version. NIV. Copyright 1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved.

Scripture quotations identified as nasb are taken from The New American Standard Bible. Copyright 1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1975, 1977, 1995 by the Lockman Foundation. Used by permission.

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any meanselectronic, mechanical, photocopy, recording, or any otherexcept for brief quotations in printed reviews, without the prior permission of the publisher.

The website addresses recommended throughout the book are offered as a resource to you. These websites are not intended in any way to be or imply an endorsement on the part of Zondervan, nor do we vouch for their content for the life of this book.

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CONTENTS

As I write this, it is the week before Thanksgiving. And while I should always have a thankful heart, my sense of gratitude is especially profound at this moment. Another project is complete. Another book is done. I am relieved, grateful, and even wistful all at the same time.

The relief is for obvious reasons. Yes, I have written another book. But this book is hardly the work of one person. The research team members, whose photos you see on page 11, were incredible. Simply stated, they were the best team I have ever seen. They did not merely conduct research; they poured out their hearts to the lost and unchurched people they interviewed. Thank you is too small a response from me to these men and women.

Two leaders of the research team deserve special recognition. Twyla Fagan started this project as a Ph.D. student and part-time researcher. I was so impressed with her work that I hired her full time. Thank you, Twyla, for making this project one of the most fascinating and rewarding endeavors ever done. Your leadership was key.

Deborah White started this project as a student doing research. I was so impressed with her work that I hired her also. I cannot do too many research projects, because I will go broke hiring people!

Special appreciation goes to two exceptional women. Kathy Fredrick is my remarkable and accomplished secretary. She is simply the best. I cannot enumerate all that she did to make this project and book a reality. I hope Kathy will be around for many years to come.

Thanks also to Reba Pendleton, also known as McEntire. God blessed our office when he brought your cheerful servant spirit to us.

This book is my second work with Zondervan and, like the first, it has been a joy. Paul Engle is a gentleman, a scholar, a Christlike example, and a great editor. I pray that this book will be but the second of many with Zondervan.

This book is first dedicated to a group of boys I love unashamedly. They are the friends of our three sons, who have spent literally thousands of hours at our home. The last wave of boys is now coming to an end as our youngest son, Jess, graduates from high school. The joy and laughter the boys of Christian Academy of Louisville have brought to the Rainer home is immeasurable. God knows how deeply I love these guys and how much I will miss them. They came into our home as boys, and they leave as men. Though I will miss them greatly, my life is much richer for the years I have spent with them.

The clock is ticking rapidly. In just a short while, the last of our three sons will leave the house. The day that I have dreaded in many ways is close. The empty nest is about to become a reality.

The depth of the love I have for Sam, Art, and Jess is unbelievable. Even as I type these words about my sons, I am wiping tears from my eyes. How I love you guys. You have been the greatest boys in the world. You put up with your dads travels and writings and crazy schedule and loved me unconditionally. Yes, you have been the greatest boys in the world. But now you are men. And your dad is unbelievably proud of each of you.

But there is a positive side to the empty nest. For the years that God gives us, I will get to spend them with the love of my youth, the love of my middle years, and, God willing, the love of my senior years. Nellie Jo has been a stay-at-home mom for twenty-three years. She has held the home together while I worked, traveled, and wrote. Now I hope that most of my trips will not be alone. It is your time, Doll. Thanks for a quarter century of love, commitment, and understanding. The first twenty-five years have been great, but the best is yet to come.