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Carol Franco - The Legacy Guide: Capturing the Facts, Memories, and Meaning of Your Life

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The ultimate guide and companion for anyone who wants to record the story of his or her life or that of a loved one.
Have you ever wondered about an ancestor you know only as a compelling face in a faded family photograph? Imagine discovering an entire book on this ancestors life -one that described the world in which he lived and detailed his dreams, accomplishments, disappointments, and the accumulated wisdom of a lifetime. The Legacy Guide helps readers create such a book. Designed for writers and non-writers alike, it outlines a simple, intuitive, and highly flexible framework for turning your personal history-or that of a loved one-into a treasured family heirloom.
Its been said that everyone has a story to tell, but anyone who has sat down to record his or her life story will tell you that there were moments of feeling completely overwhelmed and frustrated. Introducing the innovative program Facts to Memories to Meaning, The Legacy Guide takes you step-by-step through the seven stages of life-such as childhood, adolescence, young adulthood, etc.-to recall moments long forgotten and to discover their significance. And it helps you fashion these pieces together, much as you would a scrapbook, into a creative and compelling whole. Full of engaging and instructive quotations from the famous and the not-so-famous who have committed their stories to paper, The Legacy Guide will inspire you to capture the milestone events that have given shape to your life and allow you to weave them into a book that preserves this legacy for generations to come.

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Carol Franco
The Legacy Guide: Capturing the Facts, Memories, and Meaning of Your Life

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Table of Contents FROM TO Let this book be your guide as you record - photo 1
Table of Contents

FROM

TO

Let this book be your guide
as you record your life and legacy.

Allow us to know you as a person.
Help us learn from your experience.
Tell us how you became the person we love.
PERMISSIONS AND CREDITS From Confessions of an Actor by Laurence Olivier Used - photo 2
PERMISSIONS AND CREDITS From Confessions of an Actor by Laurence Olivier Used - photo 3
PERMISSIONSAND CREDITS
From Confessions of an Actor by Laurence Olivier. Used by permission of Weidenfeld & Nicolson, an imprint of the Orion Publishing Group.

Submitted selections from pages 20-21, 42, 102, 148-149 from An American Childhood by Annie Dillard. Copyright 1987 by Annie Dillard. Reprinted by permission of HarperCollins Publishers.

From My Life So Far by Jane Fonda. Copyright 2005 by Jane Fonda. Used by permission of Random House, Inc.

Excerpts from Manhattan, When I Was Young by Mary Cantwell. Copyright 1995 by Mary Cantwell. Reprinted by permission of Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

From American Girl by Mary Cantwell. Copyright 1992 by Mary Cantwell. Used by permission of Random House, Inc.

From One Writers Beginnings by Eudora Welty, pages 30, 92-93. Cambridge, Mass.: Harvard University Press. Copyright 1983, 1984 by Eudora Welty. Reprinted by permission of the publisher.

From The Road from Coorain by Jill Ker Conway. Copyright 1989 by Jill Ker Conway. Used by permission of Alfred A. Knopf, a division of Random House, Inc.

From Miriams Kitchen by Elizabeth Ehrlich. Copyright 1997 by Elizabeth Ehrlich. Used by permission of Viking Penguin, a division of Penguin Group (USA) Inc.

From Never Have Your Dog Stuffed by Alan Alda. Copyright 2005 by Mayflower Productions, Inc. Used by permission of Random House, Inc.

From In Pharaohs Army by Tobias Wolff. Copyright 1994 by Tobias Wolff. Used by permission of Alfred A. Knopf, a division of Random House, Inc.

From Whats Worth Knowing by Wendy Lustbader. Copyright 2001 by Wendy Lustbader. Used by permission of Jeremy P. Tarcher, an imprint of Penguin Group (USA) Inc.

From Personal History by Katharine Graham. Copyright 1997 by Katharine Graham. Used by permission of Alfred A. Knopf, a division of Random House, Inc.

From True North by Jill Ker Conway. Copyright 1994 by Jill Ker Conway. Used by permission of Alfred A. Knopf, a division of Random House, Inc.

From The House on Beartown Road by Elizabeth Cohen. Copyright 2003 by Elizabeth Cohen. Used by permission of Random House, Inc.

Excerpts from The Tender Land: A Family Love Story by Kathleen Finneran. Copyright 2000 by Kathleen Finneran. Reprinted by permission of Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

Reprinted by permission of the Harvard Business School Press. From Leadership on the Line by Ronald A. Heifetz and Marty Linsky, Boston, Mass., pages 9-10. Copyright 2002 by Ronald A. Heifetz and Marty Linsky. This story is adapted from From Wasteland to Homeland: Trauma and the Renewal of the Indigenous Communities in North America by Sousan Abadian (Ph.D. dissertation, Harvard University, 1999). The names have been changed and the story altered to maintain confidentiality.

From Reinvented Lives by Charles and Elizabeth Handy. Published by Hutchinson. Reprinted by permission of the Random House Group Ltd.

From A Lotus Grows in the Mud by Goldie Hawn, with Wendy Holden. Copyright 2005 by Illume, LLC. Used by permission of G. P. Putnams Sons, a division of Penguin Group (USA) Inc.

Reprinted by permission of the Harvard Business School Press. From Leadership on the Line by Ronald A. Heifetz and Marty Linsky, Boston, Mass., pages 217-218. Copyright 2002 by Ronald A. Heifetz and Marty Linsky.

From The Year of Magical Thinking by Joan Didion. Copyright 2005 by Joan Didion. Used by permission of Alfred A. Knopf, a division of Random House, Inc.

From The Older the Fiddle, the Better the Tune by Willard Scott and Friends. Copyright 2003 Willard Scott. Reprinted by permission of Hyperion. All rights reserved.
TO OUR BELOVED FAMILIES

Carol

My parents Ruth and Ed
My brother Allen and his wife Wei
My sister Toby

Kent

My parents Ethel and Frank
My children Eric, Lauren, Lesley, and Rich
My grandchildren Ted, Phoebe, and Hadley
My sister Marcia and her husband Robert
PREFACE
When I was barely a teenager I saw on my fathers dresser a note he had - photo 4
When I was barely a teenager, I saw on my fathers dresser a note he had obviously writtento himself and placed where he would see it at the beginning and end of each day.In his neat, distinctive hand that was half script, half printing, the note said, Whenyou get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. Well, being a typical adolescent,I thought that was the dumbest thing Id ever heard. (Never mind my fathermeant it only for himself.) Years, decades, later, after struggling through my own trialsas a grown-up, I came to appreciate the wisdom of what he wrote. But only after my dadwas buried did I begin to wonder what provoked him to write that note and put it onhis dresser. Something did. Some pressure, some fear, some personal demon. Ill neverknow.
KENT LINEBACK, personal story
Both of us, Carol and Kent, have lost parents. We didnt realize until they were gone just how much of their lives remained a mystery to us.
Ironically, the degree of mystery didnt depend on how much contact wed had with them. All his adult life, Kent lived on the East Coast, while his parents lived on the West. They saw each other only on occasion. Carol, on the other hand, saw her parents often and talked to them every day through the many last years of their lives. She and they shared the details of each others daily activities. Yet after they died, she realized what vast gaps remained in her knowledge of their lives, even about simple details. It wasnt for lack of interest, but somehow in spite of their close relationship and daily contact, the holes and mysteries never got resolved. Learning someones life story, she discovered, doesnt happen casually.
Both of us wish, in particular, that we had learned to know our parents as people. We saw them for decades in their roles as parents. Not until we became mature adults ourselves did they become in our minds ordinary people struggling with the same life challenges we all face. Sometimes we find ourselves playing a little game: when we remember a key moment in our own lives, we figure out how old Mom or Dad was then. Its often a shock to realize he or she was younger at that time than we are now. That realization changes how we see them and immediately brings to mind questions about their lives thenlives which, we now realize, probably were not too different from our own. Tie a knot and hang on. Our questions, sadly, will remain questions forever.
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