Jeffrey Brantley, MD, DFAPA, has practiced mindfulness meditation for over thirty years, and his work in medicine and psychiatry has emphasized mindfulness and mindfulness-based interventions to promote individual health and well-being. He is a founding faculty member of Duke Integrative Medicine, and founded the Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction Program at Duke Integrative Medicine in 1998. Brantley is the author of Calming Your Anxious Mind and coauthor of the Five Good Minutes series and Daily Meditations for Calming Your Anxious Mind.
Foreword writer Barbara L. Fredrickson, PhD, is author of Love 2.0, and is Kenan Distinguished Professor of Psychology and director of the Positive Emotions and Psychophysiology Laboratory at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill.
JeffCalming Your Angry Mind is a wonderful guide to help you transform your anger through mindfulness, understanding, and compassion. It is filled with many practical and hands-on mindfulness practices that you can bring into your everyday life. This book shows you how to live a life with less anger and more peace.
Bob Stahl, PhD, coauthor of A Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction Workbook, Living With Your Heart Wide Open, Calming the Rush of Panic, and A Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction Workbook for Anxiety
With compassion, clarity, and skill, Dr. Brantley provides a practical guide to dealing with anger productively and, more broadly, an inspirational introduction to the broader practice of mindfulness.
Richard M. Jaffe, associate professor in the department of religious studies at Duke University
Publishers Note
This publication is designed to provide accurate and authoritative information in regard to the subject matter covered. It is sold with the understanding that the publisher is not engaged in rendering psychological, financial, legal, or other professional services. If expert assistance or counseling is needed, the services of a competent professional should be sought.
Call Me By My True Names from PEACE IS EVERY STEP: THE PATH OF MINDFULNESS IN EVERYDAY LIFE by Thich Nhat Hahn, copyright 1991 by Thich Nhat Hanh. Used by permission of Bantam Books, a division of Random House, Inc. Any third party use of this material, outside of this publication, is prohibited. Interested parties must apply directly to Random House, Inc. for permission.
Everything Is Waiting for You from EVERYTHING IS WAITING FOR YOU by David Whyte, copyright 2003 by Many Rivers Press, Langley, Washington. Printed with permission from Many Rivers Press, http://www.davidwhyte.com.
Distributed in Canada by Raincoast Books
Copyright 2014 by Jeffrey Brantley
New Harbinger Publications, Inc.
5674 Shattuck Avenue
Oakland, CA 94609
www.newharbinger.com
Cover design by Amy Shoup
Acquired by Tesilya Hanauer
Edited by Jean Blomquist
All Rights Reserved.
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data on file
Contents
foreword
You have in Dr. Jeffrey Brantleys latest book a profoundly useful and accessible approach to improving your day-to-day life experiences. Here you can learn and practice simple techniques that will improve your health and your relationships and, perhaps most importantly, provide you with everyday peace of mind.
Anger is something everyone experiences. Indeed, feeling irritated, annoyed, or even outraged is an unavoidable fact of being human. It is vital to know, though, that anger comes with its own blinders and rigid beliefs. It narrows your thinking and pulls you into the blame game. Anger also covers its tracks by making you absolutely certain that your view of the offending situation is 100 percent correct. Making matters worse, any emotion that you feel in this moment slyly works to increase the odds that youll feel that same emotion in the next moment. With all the insidious ways that anger can control your mind, you can begin to see how it can come to dominate your days, even your life.
Yet even though angerlike any other negative emotionis to be expected as a normal human experience, the truth is that you need not become a victim of your anger. Psychological science makes it clear that you can choose not to cultivate or prolong your angry experiences. Anger need not become a lifestyle. Science has cataloged the damage done when this challenging state of mind becomes a persons baseline, or first impulse: you can pay a high price in terms of compromised health, strained relationships, and unhappiness.
If anger has come to rule you in ways that you no longer appreciate, rest assuredyou can change. This book can help. Drawing equally on ancient wisdom traditions and twenty-first century scientific breakthroughs, Dr. Brantley skillfully weaves practices for calming your angry mind together with vivid success stories that will inspire you to achieve the changes you seek.
You will learn core practices of mindfulness and compassion, plus how and when to deploy them. You will gain wisdom and insight into your own inner workings. You will learn to curb your angry and other negative feelings in ways that will allow you to find more joy, more connection, and more meaning in your days. You will pave the way toward flourishing.
Congratulations on taking the first steps toward understanding your mind and your anger. I wish you every success as you absorb and put into practice the deep wisdom that Dr. Brantley offers here.
Barbara L. Fredrickson, PhD
Kenan Distinguished Professor of Psychology
University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill
Author of Positivity and Love 2.0
introduction
Do you ever get tired of being angry?
Do you ever feel weary from the edginess and dreariness that insistent judgments and blaming thoughts bring into your relationships and into your daily life?
Have you ever become concerned about the impact that your irritable and mean words and actions have on others?
If your answer to any of those questions is yes, then this book might help you.
Do you ever wish your life could be happier, or wonder if you might be much moreas a human beingthan you feel you are in the burning heat of angry moments?
Have you ever wished that your friendlier, wiser, calmer, and better self would more often appear and guide you in your relationships with your loved ones, interactions with coworkers, and your encounters with the joys and challenges of living every day?
If your answer to any of those questions is yes, then perhaps this book can help with that too. This is a simple book for ordinary people, and it could be useful every day of your life.
This is a book about anger and you; and, more importantly, it is about discovering and using the power you already have to change your relationship to anger in any of its many forms and expressions. By learning to free yourself from angers grip, you can immediately transform your lifeand feel greater ease and more happiness more often. You may also be surprised to discover new dimensions of kindness, understanding, and love for yourself and others.
Your innate power to change is based in mindfulness, which is another name for awareness. Mindfulness is an energy and quality that all human beings are capable of touching because it is based in our basic human intelligence and is informed by our already present potential for goodness, including our capacity for kindness and compassion.
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