Lloyd - Never Give Up: How To Overcome Anything

A man is but the product of his thoughts. What he thinks, he becomes. ~ Mahatma Gandhi

Before you can begin to create the life that you have always wanted, you need to look deeply at this first principle.

Accepting who you are and taking responsibility is probably the hardest thing you may ever have to do. It is not easy and you may feel uncomfortable because we usually like to blame outside influences for the parts of our life that were not particularly happy with. It is easy to blame your current situation on other people, the economy, your lack of opportunities, or even bad luck, but the truth of the matter is this: you are responsible for your life and no one else!

I know this may be hard to accept, but if you really want to change your life for the better, you must take responsibility for your own thoughts, actions and, ultimately, your own happiness.

If you want to create a successful career, loving relationships and financial security, then you have to take total responsibility, not only for your past deeds, but for all your future ones, too.

My Story

In 1989 I had built up a very successful business as a Remedial Therapist. I had not long finished college and was busy treating patients with a variety of muscular and soft tissue injuries and conditions. It wasnt long before I was approached by some friends of the family who ran a large retirement home for the elderly. They asked if I would be interested in trying to organise some kind of weekly group activity class for the residents, possibly involving some light exercise and games. I jumped at the chance because it would give me the opportunity to learn new ways in which I could help people.

The classes were an instant success. Every week I would visit the eagerly awaiting residents and motivate them as they enjoyed an hour of fun and entertainment in which we stretched, waved our arms and moved around to various pieces of music, ranging from classical to rock and roll.

The owners of the retirement home were very pleased. The energy levels and spirits of the residents had lifted, the staff benefited from the positive mood change and my phone was ringing constantly from other eager proprietors wanting to secure my services. Within two months, my weekly appointment book was full. I had over thirty retirement homes and hundreds of happy and appreciative residents all enjoying the benefits of my motivational classes. I bought my first house with my girlfriend and future wife and even bought a cat to celebrate. Life was good and I was beginning to reap the rewards of my efforts.

Then disaster struck: I messed up big time. A relative had got himself into a sticky situation with a powerful businessman and I naively thought I could help. I agreed to be his associate and try to help him find a way out which would suit both parties.

As you can probably guess, things didnt turn out exactly as I had planned for I was arrested soon afterwards and remanded in Durham Prison, one of Englands toughest and most notorious jails. I would spend over seven weeks in hell, facing a possible lengthy prison sentence. As you can imagine, it was a far cry from dancing around a large room trying to waltz with an elderly lady (and often a gentleman). My world had fallen apart and I only had myself to blame. After all, it was through my own stupidity that I had offered to help. No one had forced my hand, it had all been my own idea and I would have to face the music.

I managed to get bail after seven weeks, thanks to the efforts of my family and relatives. Unfortunately, I had to spend the next nine months under strict bail conditions before my crown court trial later that year.

After eleven days in court, the Judge stopped the trial and my co-accused and I were acquitted. We were free to go and were told to get on with our lives. We had been stupid and naive and were played like pawns in a game of chess.

I never returned to my business as a therapist. I was full of self-pity, hate, anger and frustration. Anger, in later years would be a contributing factor to my breakdown.

It has taken me many years to accept that I wasnt a victim. I have learned that you alone are responsible for your own actions. Blaming others is just another way of looking for an excuse. We all make mistakes in life; it is part of the learning process. But you have to accept one thingthey are your mistakes and you must learn from them if you are ever going to move on.