THANK YOUS & ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
FROM THE AUTHOR
In no particular order, except words followed by spaces and then separated by semicolons and commas:
My sister Heather; my mom and dad; my best friend, Mary; the manufacturers, distributors, and sellers of Diet Coke and Trident Original Flavor; everyone at Nerve.com; my cats Creature and Drew; my friends in New York who will hopefully still like me enough to purchase this after having every social invitation rejected for well over a year; my friends on LiveJournal for their invaluable input; all the awesome ladies who shared their stories; family and friends too many to name but who are all the coolest; and last, Eric, for his endless patience, uncontested surrender of the living room, and unconditional support. Ill stop now before I break into power ballad, but please know that you are the best tour mate a girl could ever ask for.
FROM THE ILLUSTRATOR
My sister Erin; my mom and dad; my awesome friends who encouraged me throughout this project, especially Martina, Karell, Chassy, Charles, Marc, Stephen, Jenny, Jonathan, Andrew, Clara, Shek, and Nathan; the Detroit Free Press Sunday funny pages and Mad magazine for first introducing me to the art of parody; and last, the fine gentlemen of rock n roll, may you never see these ridiculous caricatures of you.
FROM BOTH
Wed like to thank Brandi Bowles at Howard Morhaim; Gabrielle Moss, David Walker, and Meighan Cavanaugh at Tarcher/Penguin; and Katherine Obertance, for their hard work, encouragement, and all-around coolness, as well as all the hand-holding and neuroses-wrangling that comes with working with first-time authors.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR & ILLUSTRATOR
Though Will Smith was the DJ and Jazzy Jeff was the rapper, the roles werent so clearly defined for this tome. It involved a lot of cross-collaboration and more than a few brainstorming sessions at Ace, Double Down, and other East Village dive institutions. If you see a funny caption or a particularly clever turn of phrase, be sure to compliment both sisters. Otherwise, one of us will get mad and rip down the others INXS posters.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Erin Bradley is the author of Miss Information, a weekly sex and dating advice column appearing on Nerve.com. When shes not at her day job in advertising (dont judge!) or writing freelance for various entertainment and tech publications, Erin can be found watching prison documentaries and Golden Girls reruns in her apartment in Manhattans East Village. The first record she ever bought was a 45 rpm of Eat It by Weird Al. She lost her concert virginity during MC Hammers Please Hammer, Dont Hurt Em tour, though she wishes it had happened during Aerosmiths 1975 cross-country Toys in the Attic road show featuring Foghat, Ted Nugent, REO Speedwagon, and Steppenwolf. Sadly, Ms. Bradley was still in utero at the time.
ABOUT THE ILLUSTRATOR
Heather Bradley is an award-winning designer and illustrator whose work has been published in print and online in Seventeen, Teen, and Sex, Etc., and on iVillage.com. Her all-time favorite gig was at gURL.com, where she was the creative director and comic editor for over a thousand years in Internet time. When shes not drawing caricatures of aging rock stars, Heather teaches graphic design and illustration at the New York University School of Continuing and Professional Studies. She currently lives in Park Slope, Brooklyn, with her mineral/fossil collection and Monster, her cat. When she grows up, she wants to be Robert Smith of The Cure.
AFTER PARTY
Howd it go? Are your ears ringing? Is your voice hoarse? More important, did you get the drummers phone number? By now youve amassed more knowledge than Van Halen has lead singers. Will you use it for good or evil?
Whatever you do, and
whomever you do, remember Rock n Rolls Golden Rule:
Be kind, be cool, and be sure to get documentation.
One day, when youre old and gray and happily coupled or a sexy senior citizen breaking hearts at the nursing home, youre going to want a little memento for the dashboard of your hoverpod. Make it a good one.
Yours in rock,
Erin and Heather
BAD COMPANY
Fig. 1a: Bad Company
THE MEET & GREET
Who He Is
An unstable mess in irresistible packagingthe reason Life Skills courses should be mandatory at all public schools and colleges. A boozer. A user. A regular patron of emergency rooms, check-cashing places, and Hallmark Gold Crown stores. All of the crazy of dating a real-life rock star without the fame, fortune, or cushy tour bus.
What Hes All About
Avoiding reality, seeking out confrontation, and finding that sweet spot between hedonism and survival. Bad Company is the king of playing off the sympathies of others. If it werent for his carefully maintained network of enablers, hed most likely be homeless or, even worse, working steady employment. He makes bad decision after bad decision, yet operates under the assumption that the world is out to get him rather than accepting ownership of his problems. On the plus side, hes ridiculously attractive. Other adjectives include intuitive, charming, and loyal. He may flunk at life, but when it comes to having fun, hes in advanced placement. Bad Company is the guy you warned yourself about. Your head says no, your heart says, Fuck it, why not?
Turn - one
Bottle returns, free food, roll-your-own cigarettes, faux suicide threats, breaking up, getting back together, borrowing your ATM card, scratch-offs, pay-as-you-go cell phones.
Turnoffs
Your day job, your best friend, your roommate, your dad, your mom, fruits and vegetables, anything that requires being at a certain place at a certain time, AA meetings, formal wear, suggestions to cut down.
THE HEADLINERS
All musicians misbehave. Its practically part of the record contract. Standing out requires a certain brand of je ne sais fuck itthat blend of pretty boy meets human wreckage otherwise known as Bad Company.
Lets start with an Oliver Twist indie type whos always Please sir, may I have another? when it comes to leggy models and heroin, continue with a folk icon who parties like... well... someone whos not a folk icon, and finish with a Grammy winner high on wine, women, and cough syrup.
PETE DOHERTY
Im vain because
Im imperfect.
Pete Doherty,
The Sunday Times,
May 14, 2006
Who He Is
English singer/songwriter, founder of the Libertines, Babyshambles front man when he remembers, astrologically a Pisces, which makes him mysterious, altruistic, passionate, and prone to lesions.
What Makes Him Such Bad Company
Unable to learn from prior mistakes, keeps getting arrested for the same things, keeps making and breaking the same promises, keeps doing the same drugs. Its like that movie
