Kotb Hoda - Where we belong: journeys that show us the way

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ALSO BY HODA KOTB

Hoda: How I Survived War Zones, Bad Hair, Cancer, and Kathie Lee

Ten Years Later: Six People Who Faced Adversity and Transformed Their Lives

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Copyright 2016 by Hoda Kotb

All rights reserved, including the right to reproduce this book or portions thereof in any form whatsoever. For information, address Simon & Schuster Subsidiary Rights Department, 1230 Avenue of the Americas, New York, NY 10020.

First Simon & Schuster hardcover edition January 2016

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Interior design by Ruth Lee-Mui

Jacket design by Laurie Carkeet

Jacket photograph by Eric Ray Davidson

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

Kotb, Hoda, 1964 author.

Where we belong : journeys that show us the way / Hoda Kotb, with Jane Lorenzini.

pages cm

1. Conduct of lifeCase studies. 2. Self-realizationCase studies. 3. Career changesCase studies. 4. SatisfactionCase studies. 5. VocationCase studies. I. Lorenzini, Jane, author. II. Title.

BJ1589.K67 2016

170'.44dc232015024127

ISBN 978-1-4767-5242-6

ISBN 978-1-4767-5244-0 (ebook)

To Hala, Adel, Jenny, and Jill

CONTENTS

INTRODUCTION

Maybe you did it today. You asked yourself: What the hell am I doing in this job... in this relationship... in this city?

Most of us go there. We float around in the half-empty glass, gaze out into the world of possibilities, and wonder:

Is it too late to do that thing that made me so happy when I was little?

Could what matters most to me finally be the center of my life?

Can I really trust this yearning voice in my head and longing in my heart?

What were really asking ourselves... from the gut... is: Do I feel like Im where I belong?

Lots of us are asking. There are twenty-five times as many life coaches on duty around the world as there were ten years ago. More and more of us feel it is indeed okay to admit to ourselvesand to someone elsethat we feel like we dont belong... in our careers, our relationships, our overall daily existence. And were confused about how much control we have in making our lives better, and ideally, the best we can imagine.

Certainly, pinpointing exactly where you belongwhere happiness awaitsis tricky.

When youre young, its difficult to know what will make you happy. When youre older, you finally know what makes you happy, but its complicated to redirect your many-pronged life. Plus, the head and the heart are such different decision makers. Often, one of the two is a sucker for distractions, excuses, and doubt.

The reaction is interesting when you share with someone the concept of this book. There is a tilt of the head. You can almost hear the mental wheels begin to turn: Holy cow, Im not even close to being where I belong in my life right now. The topic is uncomfortable for some. For others, there is affirmation, a chance to acknowledge that their inner compass is indeed pointed in the right direction. Well... yes. I am where I belong!

Ive known for a long time where I belong, and yet Im on the slow track to arriving there. I belong with kids, little kids who need guidance and love. Growing up, I thought Id become a second-grade teacher, but in college, journalism caught my eye and has kept me interested for nearly three decades. I also grew up hoping to one day get married and have three children. That plan, well, had some unexpected snagsdivorce, illness, and now, my age. Still, Ill get there... to the place where what brings me the most joy brings joy to others, too. Im thinking a summer camp for underprivileged kids. I can teach them, enjoy their silliness, and hit the pillow knowing I spent the day doing that which has delighted my head and heart for so long.

This book is my way of confirmingmaybe even to myselfthat its possible, no matter when, to create a life thats both fun and rewarding. In the pages ahead, youll meet the extraordinary people who are the proof. These wide-ranging stories offer us all hope that its never too late, or early, to identify what brings us joy and peace. Some recognize it early in lifeas early as grammar school; others need five decades. In this book, youll experience what its like for people to realize not only that theyre on the wrong path, but also thatyikes!a leap of faith is the only way to get from Point A to Point Belong.

One story features a young girl who faced a vast chasm between her big dream and the small factory town where she grew up. Burdened by discouraging words and an impoverished upbringing, she worked hard and smart to courageously pursue what she knew she was meant to do. Regret was not an option.

Another story explores the delicate dance of relationship and marriage. When a husband created and followed a fork in the road to pursue personal happiness, his wife felt like their agreed-upon life plan had been knifed in the process. What happened to us and we? Their journey to feel content as individuals and as a team is compelling.

There is also a story of hope. If youve ever felt that somethings missing in your life, but you have no idea what it is, perhaps take a look back over your shoulder. A man in his fifties did and saw something he never thought he wanted. That second look changed his world, and now he and his wife work to improve lives around the globe.

Youll also read the story of a woman who, in her thirties, found both love and her place in a community. The unique neighborhood she happened upon in life was rich in ways that the mansion she grew up in could never be. She was finally home.

Tucked in between these intriguing stories will be lovely little offerings from names you knowsuperstars in their fields. What you may not know is that they too had fish-out-of-water phases in their lives. Before the sparkle of celebrity, there were gray clouds of frustration and worry. What did it feel like before the road to success revealed itself? How did big fish change directions midstream? Each will identify the guideposts that led to a place of peace and fulfillment.