Libby Scott - Can You See Me?

For Mum.

Thank you for understanding me and helping me to understand myself. This book is also dedicated to every girl that feels like she doesnt fit instand out and be brave!

L IBBY XOXO

For Adam, who from the very first, glorious day has encouraged me to look up at the sky instead of down at my feet.

R EBECCA

ook up. Go on, do it now. Stretch back your neck and stare up, as far as you can. And then a little bit more. Thats where youre going to have to look if you want to find Tally Olivia Adams. Up where the sky begins. Up where the only rule is gravity. Up where the world seems small and not so important. Up where the possibilities are endless.

It is a final-days-of-summer kind of afternoon. Fluffy white clouds are scudding across the pale blue sky and the air has a hint of something fresh, something new. A normal day on a normal street in the backyard of a normal house belonging to a completely normal family. Read that last sentence again, out loud to yourself. Its funny how if you say it enough times, the word normal sounds anything but.

So, a normal day. But the girl standing on the roof of the shed in the backyard is not normal in the slightest. She is a warrior, fierce and brave, surveying the land before her. Shes a mountain climber, pausing for breath after scaling the heady heights of Everest. She is a trapeze artist, about to step out onto the wire and dazzle the crowds beneath her.

Her right foot rises in the air, shaking slightly as she contemplates the drop. One wrong move and it will all be over.

Hey! Get down!

The shout makes Tally wobble and for a split second it seems as if she will tumble to earth. But then her foot makes contact with the roof and she lowers herself to the ridge, sitting with her legs dangling out in front of her.

You nearly made me fall. Tally glares at Nell accusingly. Are you trying to kill me?

Nell puts her hands on her hips. You seem to be doing a good enough job of that by yourself. What are you doing? You know Mom and Dad said that you arent allowed to go up there anymore. Not after last time.

Tally shrugs. Its my place. Im practicing the things I learned in circus school last week. And I cant think anywhere else.

Its summer vacation. Nell taps her foot impatiently. There isnt anything to think about, so just get down.

Tally wonders if her sister has always been this unimaginative or if its something that happens when you start high school. If thats the case, then shes even less eager for this week to be over and September to begin.

Is it true that people flush your head down the toilet when youre in sixth grade? she asks Nell. Because if it is, then I wont be able to drink anything all day in case it makes me need to use the bathroom, which means that I will be seriously dehydrated and my brain wont work very effectively and Im probably going to fail every single test. And it wont even be my fault because all Ill be trying to do is stay as far away from the school bathrooms as humanly possible.

Nell snorts. Only the mouthy kids that dont know when to shut up.

A warm breeze flutters through the yard, picking up the leaves that have fallen onto the lawn. They werent there last week and their russet-red shine against the long green grass is a reminder that the summer cant last forever. Her days at home are numbered.

What happens if I get lost? Tallys voice is quiet.

Nell pushes her hair out of her eyes and squints up at the roof.

Then the two-headed monster that lives in the janitors closet will find you, she says as menacingly as she possibly can. And it will drag you in and keep you hostage among the brooms and mops and buckets. And you will have to stay at school for the rest of your life.

Tally doesnt even blink. She isnt afraid of made-up monsters. There are far scarier things roaming the school corridors than two-headed beasts, shes very sure of that.

Come on, Tally. Nell is impatient now. Get down from there. Im totally not in the mood for Mom and Dad giving me another lecture about how I should be keeping an eye on you. Like youre some kind of baby or something.

Im not a baby. And I didnt ask you to come out here. Tally glares down at Nell. Just go away and pretend that you didnt see me.

Well, youre lucky it was me that caught you and not them. Nell frowns, imagining the argument that would have followed if her parents had spotted their youngest daughter on top of the shed.

Tally shakes her head. She doesnt feel very lucky to have moaning, nagging, boring Nell ruining her thinking time.

Youll be grounded for a week if they see you up there, warns Nell. They wont even let you into the backyard if they think they cant trust you.

Tally looks away from her big sister and across the fence toward the street. She knows that if she stands up, she can see between the houses and as far as the park. She can see farther than Nell can. Up here she is weightless and free. The opposite of grounded.

Where are they? she asks Nell. Mom and Dad.

Nell glances back toward the house, which is almost hidden by the old apple tree, sagging under the weight of all the unpicked fruit. The entire yard has turned into a jungle this summer.

Theyre out by the front gate, talking to Mrs. Jessop and her gross dog, she tells Tally. I dont know how she can take it for walks when it looks like that. Its embarrassing.

Its not Ruperts fault that hes got three legs. Tally is unimpressed with Nells attitude. Dont be so horrible. Think about how youd feel if you had three legs. You wouldnt like it if people thought you looked gross, would you?

Nell rolls her eyes. Whatever. Now get down before they come out here and see you.

She waits for a response but Tally isnt listening. Instead, she is clambering to her feet and balancing on the roof, shading her eyes with one hand as she peers into the distance.

I think theres a fair going up in the park. Theres a load of people and trailers and I can see a big truck that looks like it has bumper cars on the back.

What? Nell squints up at Tally. That cant be right. The fair isnt coming for months. And will you please get down before you fall off and I get the blame?

Im not going to fall off. And I can see the fair, actually.

Are you sure? Nell strains to stand on her tiptoes and look in the direction of the park, but she cant see a thing.

The fair is one of the few things that they both agree is a good thing . It doesnt matter that Nell is fourteen and Tally is only elevenwhen the fair is in town they are both equally excited.

Tally plants her feet more firmly and leans forward, trying to identify the different trucks and vans. I think I can see the Twirler. And theres something that could be part of the carouselit looks like one of the horses, anyway!

Theres the sound of scrambling beneath her and suddenly Nells head pops up from the top of the ladder.

Where? Are you sure its actually setting up in our park? Her voice is eager with an added tinge of apprehension. This wouldnt be the first time that Tally has gotten things wrong.

See for yourself. Tally waves her hand toward the distance. If you dont believe me.

Theres a moment of hesitation and then Nell climbs the last few rungs and crawls her way up the roof to where Tally is standing.