Sheryl Gurrentz - A Strange Period.: Insights into the Bizarre Experiences of Perimenopausal Women

A STRANGE PERIOD.

Insights into the Bizarre Experiences of
Perimenopausal Women

by

Sheryl Gurrentz and Cindy Singer

iUniverse, Inc.

Bloomington

A STRANGE PERIOD.

Insights into the Bizarre Experiences of Perimenopausal Women

Copyright 2011 by Sheryl Gurrentz and Cindy Singer

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the publisher except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

The views expressed in this work are solely those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

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Cover by Cindy Singer and Sheryl Gurrentz

ISBN: 978-1-4620-7016-9 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-4620-7019-0 (e)

iUniverse rev. date: 12/05/2011

Contents

Chapter 9
Looking at the World Through Guy-Colored Glasses-Your Partners Perspective on Perimenopause

Chapter 10
It Aint Over Till the Menopausal Lady Sings-Life After Perimenopause

Also by Cindy Singer and Sheryl Gurrentz

If Your Child is Bipolar: A Parent-to-Parent Guide to Living With and

Loving a Bipolar Child

Copyright 2004 ISBN 1-930085-06-0

Also by Sheryl Gurrentz

The Guilt-Free Guide to Your New Life as a Mom

Copyright 2001 ISBN 1-930085-01-x

I Have My Resume-Now What? (With Kay Prince)

Copyright 1992 ASIN: B0006OZROE

Dedication

For all the women who have sweated it out in silence

a nd

For all the women who dared to bare their perimenopausal symptoms to their men, doctors, and/or non-perimenopausal friends and were told, Youre too young, Its just your imagination, or, You just need to eat healthier and exercise more.

and

For all our friends and family members who suffered through our incessant questioning about their perimenopausal experiences (in particular: Carol, Heidi, Sherri, Stacey, Robin, and especially our moms, Carol and Judith) and for Kim who shared her talent, creativity, and experiences so generously.

and

For all the women who will read this book and realize they are not alone, not imagining things, not going crazy, and should not be embarrassed to talk about (and laugh about) what they are experiencing .

SECTION I
AND NOW, A WORD FROM
OUR SPONSORS

H ave you been wondering if maybe you have early dementia, a thyroid problem, or some mysterious disorder that might explain some of the strange physical and mental changes youve been experiencing? If so, and you are in your 40s or 50s, there might be another explanation for your feelings: perimenopause. This stage of life, with all its confusing feelings and embarrassing bodily functions, is mysterious, frustrating, and long lasting. It deserves to be discussed even though it can be awkward to sit in the coffee shop with your girlfriends and have a conversation about topics such as vaginal dryness or hairy chins without attracting unwanted attention. Believe us, we have tried it! And, even if you are comfortable discussing it, your girlfriends might not be, even in private. Nevertheless, it is really important to know what other women have experienced. Then youll know whats normal, whats happening, and whats to come.

We certainly didnt set out to write a book about perimenopause. We just found ourselves gradually asking each other about changes we were feeling. First, it was strange periods. Then, it was odd hairgrowth, mental lapses, and unbelievable dryness. Overnight, it seemed we went from talking relentlessly about our children and every aspect of their lives to sharing the latest and greatest weird thing we were experiencing. As we did when we were pregnant, when we had little kids, and when we were preparing to write our previous books, we decided to do some research to get expert opinions. Much to our surprise and chagrin, there was not much there. We found many books written by doctors (most with pictures of women our mothers ages on the covers). We looked, we really did, but we just couldnt find anything that felt practical and supportive, not just informative. We wanted to hear about the personal impact of perimenopause, not just the physical effects. We wanted accurate information about how to live our lives during perimenopause, notjust about hormones or alternative treatments.

When we didnt find helpful, non-medical, non-hormone-related resources for women our age, we started talking about our experiences even more. We quickly began seeing the humor in our misery and the sheer joy and relief of sharing it with someone else. We got some of what we needed when we talked to each other and friends. There were many times when we would start discussing it with an unsuspecting victim and, before you knew it, she began spilling her hormonal guts about what she was experiencingpurging the secrets that had been building up inside and elated with relief that she was not the only one. We felt bad for the women who were clearly experiencing many of the same things we were, but just werent comfortable having conversations about the gory details that we were becoming comfortable discussing.

One evening, after a margarita and lots of conversation about our most recent physical discoveries and our frustration with the lack of appropriate information to help us cope, one of us yelled out, We should soooo write a book! Like all ideas while intoxicated, we decided it was nothing short of brilliant! At first it was just something to laugh about, but then, as we realized we were experiencing more and more strange symptoms and still not finding the information we craved, we started seriously considering the idea.

Clearly, there was a need for a resource that targets our age group, talks about more than hormones and hair loss, and shares many, many womens stories as well as offers practical, helpful information. We can all agree there seems to be a lack ofclear information about what the stages of the change are and that there is very little information on how many of us are experiencing perimenopause or menopause. There is definitely an inaccurate presumption that those of us who need this type of information are in our late 50s or 6os. While some of us certainly are, many, many of us are not.

We decided we needed to take matters into our own hands. We needed to encourage women like us to start talking about their experiences regardless ofage and stop letting anyone dictate what is or isnt accepted as part of the perimenopause process. We also decided that if no one else can provide the resources we need, we would.

You will read about many of our own experiences in this book. To protect the innocent, namely our partners and completely mortified teen-aged children, we have not disclosed which stories are ours, however! We have also gathered and shared stories from women of various ages and stages of perimenopause at real and online Hormonal Happy Hours. The result is hundreds of short musings that are easy to read (especially when you are having trouble seeing or concentrating). They will show you that: