Brian King - The Art of Taking It Easy: How to Cope with Bears, Traffic, and the Rest of Lifes Stressors

I hope so, I really do. And Im not just saying that to get you on my side either; the happiness of other people has always been very important to me.

Comedians frequently open a joke by saying, And now, a little about me, so let me start by telling you a little about myself. As the book cover says, I am Dr. Brian King, although I really only use my title as a stage name. I am a pretty casual guy so I usually just go by Brian. Besides, Ive never been comfortable calling myself Dr. Kingthat name has already been taken.

As a public speaker with a doctorate in psychology, I have been traveling the country teaching audiences about happiness, the benefits of humor, and how to manage stress for nearly a decade. These subjects are very interrelated, as managing stress is key to happiness, and humor contributes to them both. I've devoted a good chunk of my life to teaching people how to overcome stress and live happier lives. I also perform stand-up comedy, an art form with the sole purpose of making people happy. Comedians screw this up all the time, but at least that is the intent.

I seem to have an ability to present research-based information in a humorous context, and this has been the key to my success as a speaker, and now, an author. In 2016 I published a book, The Laughing Cure , all about the physical and emotional benefits of humor and laughter, which has been met with positive reviews and, I am told, has helped at least a few people become happier.

When I look back on my life, of course I see things that I could have done differently, but I was always concerned about the happiness of others. In high school I was part of a peer counseling program, based on the idea that a troubled student would prefer talking to another student rather than an adult in a position of authority. In college, I volunteered with an organization that helped organize and train a new generation of those student mentors. I also volunteered my time to a few charities, and worked in a home for emotionally disturbed children. When I became a public speaker, I took the opportunity to pursue something I had been interested in all my life.

So yes, I am interested in your happiness.

I realize that in choosing to pick up this book, there is a chance that happiness is something you may be struggling with. Maybe you are coping with some terrible circumstances or wrestling with anxiety and depression. After all, these are our most common mental disorders. Perhaps you are looking for answers, hoping that somehow these pages may contain that magical key to overcoming whatever you are dealing with. If this is the case, I dont want to discourage you from reading further, but I dont think any book has all the answers. (Unless you are looking up a phone number, in which case I know a great book for that. And what is it, 1997 where you live?)

Certainly reading a book is no substitute for professional help, but you may find some value in what I have to share.

Let me be clear, nobody is happy all the time. In fact, to be happy all the time is indicative of a disorder. Like any human trait, we would expect this to vary from person to person, and it does. Some of us are naturally quite happy, experiencing an overall high level of affect, some of us unfortunately experience much more down time, but most of us are somewhere in the middle: a level of happiness that my dad would describe as Cant complain.

When I introduce myself to seminar audiences, I often start by stating that I am quite happy, and this is true. I am definitely not the happiest person I have ever met, but I am above average in this regard. I know how to take it easy. For the cover of my last book, my brother, Jon, provided the following endorsement: Brian has been unaffected by stress since I met him when he was five. I think he tapped into how to manage stress and live on his own terms at an early age. Generally speaking, I live a pretty stress-free life, and as a result I experience more emotional highs than lows. This does not mean that I have not dealt with my share of adverse events; I absolutely have. Bad things happen all the time, but what ultimately makes the difference in our lives is how we deal with those situations.

With the growing field of Positive Psychology, there has been a lot of research on what makes people happy and how some are able to handle stress better than others. Certain characteristics and behaviors have been identified and somehow, I managed to grow to adulthood with a good set of skills for achieving happiness. In other words, I practice what I preach. For this reason, I tend to use personal examples whenever I can (and sometimes I just straight make them up; after all, I am a comedian). The doctorate in psychology helps too, but Ill let you in on a not-so-secret secret: Not all psychologists are positive. A lot of psychologists suffer from depression too.

Now you may be wondering why I spent the last couple paragraphs talking about myself. Throughout this book I am going to offer advice based on my understanding as someone trained in psychology, but I am also going to draw upon my own personal experiences. Besides, I feel it is important to have a sense of who someone is when you are evaluating their message. As they say, always check your source. If only people on Facebook followed this rule before sharing a political meme... oh well, human nature is what it is.

One more thing about me and then well move on. After a seminar on happiness one day, an audience member came up to me and said, So you are happy... are you married? to which I replied, Of course not, I said I was happy .