Mark Hall - The Well: Why Are So Many Still Thirsty?

I VE BEEN PRAYING through something.

I enjoyed a busy career as a child actor. I appeared in commercials and in such television series as St. Elsewhere, T.J. Hooker, Punky Brewster, and Growing Pains before landing the role of D.J. Tanner for eight years on ABCs Full House. After getting married and giving birth to our first child, I chose to become a stay-at-home mom while my husband, Valeri Bure, played professional hockey. It was a difficult decision and a hard transition, but one I wouldnt trade for the world. Looking back, I can begin to grasp the work God did to grow me spiritually during that time.

What comes next is why Im glad I had a chance to read The Well.

After Val retired, about three years ago we discussed the possibility of my going back to work, since he would be home. We had already talked about it years before, and Val graciously agreed. As we both prayed through our next steps, we agreed that if God opened the door for me to easily resume my acting career, then his answer would be clear. If not, I would conclude it wasnt Gods will, and I wouldnt fight hard to return to the business.

God flung the door wide open.

Before I knew it, I had booked a movie. Then came a role on the television series Make It or Break It, which began in 2009 and is still running on ABC Family. Earlier this year, I starred in the network TV movie Truth Be Told (part of the Family Movie Night Initiative) and also wrote a book titled Reshaping It All, which made it onto the New York Times bestseller list. The offers continue to roll in. The two reasons I dont work more are the personal time commitments I make to my family and my convictions to refuse projects due to content.

Heres my struggle: I know my family wants to move back to south Florida, where we lived for nine years before we moved to my hometown of Los Angeles two years ago so I could pursue my acting career again. But I cant have the career I desire if we move back to Florida.

I have felt torn for some time now. My family is my first priority, and yet theyre hanging in there with me, knowing Im fulfilling my dreams and living out my deep passion for acting. Maybe it would seem easy just to back up the moving van to the front door. Maybe thats what I should do. But then I think about the amazing number of e-mails that encourage me to continue living out my faith publicly in an industry that sorely needs such examples. Others insist Ive been placed purposefully in this industry. Even leaders of huge ministries have told me that God is using me in a special way.

I struggle to let go, trust God, and set out to make a move I know doesnt work for my job. Yet, if I really trusted God, I would drop the reins of control and see what he has in store for me even though it might not be what I want. At the same time, part of me says, Ive already been there. I gave up this dream thirteen years ago and was fine. Look how God worked in my soul. Im a different person than I used to be. Then again, after waiting ten years for the opportunity to return to acting and seeing this opportunity arise with such little effort

My heart sways back and forth. I cant distinguish Gods blessing from my own desire to control my future the way I want it.

So I opened The Well and began reading. The first chapter sliced straight through to my heart, and so did the second chapter The Hole of Control. The third chapter nailed me again The Hole of Something Better. The fourth chapter flashed my name in neon lights The Hole of Approval. And on and on it went. I saw myself in every chapter. I read truth on every page. I heard God speak to me, and he convicted my heart. He reminded me of the countless times Ive laid down my burdens and vowed never to do something again or pick up the burden again and yet still made decisions that contradicted my good intentions.

Im confident you will see yourself many times over in this book. For instance, it reminded me of my first, biggest spiritual struggle. For years, I figured being good was good enough. I was a good kid, I listened to my parents, and as a young adult I would even call them late at night when I got home after I moved into my own place. Unlike many child actors, I didnt make headlines in tabloid magazines. I didnt become addicted to alcohol or drugs and end up in rehab or on the police blotter. So why did I need Jesus if I was living such a good life?

My own goodness was my well. I patted myself on the back and bathed in compliments from peers, fans, parents, producers, and directors, all who told me that I was a great actor and an even better person. I continued to reach into what I thought was a well from God when in reality it was a dry hole.

More than ten years ago, I came to a place where I finally understood my need for Jesus. Since that day when I prayed alone in my bedroom, Ive been living my life and walking this journey as faithfully as I can for Christ. I know I wont ever have it all right. I know Ill never be perfect, and Ill still make mistakes. And I know it is in the times when I get too comfortable in my own skin that my focus likely will stray off track. But I rest in the truth that Christlike living causes us to rethink where we are and where were headed and, most of all, to trust Jesus more.

As I pray through this latest challenge before me, Im thankful that the Lord used his Word and Mark Halls keen insights to give me this crucial reminder.

Candace Cameron Bure
May, 2011