Stanley - Better Decisions, Fewer Regrets 5 Questions to Help You Determine Your Next Move
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Classic Andyaccessible to any of us wanting to change, yet deep enough to challenge you if you think you know the answers.
MAX LUCADO, pastor and New York Times bestselling author
It seems the more important the decision, the more we struggle making it. In this much needed message, Andy provides us with the wisdom we need and the questions we can ask that will lead us to choices that can improve our lives. I don't know about you, but my life is complicated enough without the confusion of uncertainty or, even worse, the turmoil of regret. This book is not just a necessary guide to better decisionsits a handbook for life that is sure to make a difference in yours.
LYSA TERKEURST, #1 New York Times bestselling author and president of Proverbs 31 Ministries
Andy is a voice Ive trusted in my life for a long time. One of the dozen things I like about Andy is that he doesnt varnish the truth but will tell us the way it is with kindness and a boatload of wisdom. This is the right book for the right time. Weve got some important decisions to make and this book will help frame the right questions to ask.
BOB GOFF, Sweet Marias husband and New York Times bestselling author of Love Does, Everybody Always, and Dream Big
When we were kids, we were warned about making faces because they might get stuck that way. In Better Decisions, Fewer Regrets, Andy Stanley helps us see a caution light that extends far beyond sticking out your tongue and crinkling up your forehead. In these pages you will discover that time doesnt change anythingit just makes you more of what you are today. Future you is an exaggerated version of current you. In the end, the life you get stuck with is the life you make. Now is the time to change your choices to regret-proof your future. Andy will show you how.
LEVI LUSKO, pastor of Fresh Life Church and author
Andy Stanley strikes again! This challenging, practical, and engaging book will help you make better decisions and lead to the life you really want. If youre looking for a book thats brimming with wisdom, insightful teaching, and that signature Andy Stanley humor, then look no furtherthis is it! I cant recommend it highly enough!
IAN MORGAN CRON, author, The Road Back to You
Wow, in this book Andy uses insights, understanding, and even humor to bring great clarity to the life-altering decisions we will all have to make. Deciding to get this book now could absolutely lead to fewer regrets later.
MICHAEL JR.
ZONDERVAN
Better Decisions, Fewer Regrets
Copyright 2020 by Andy Stanley
Requests for information should be addressed to:
Zondervan, 3900 Sparks Dr. SE, Grand Rapids, Michigan 49546
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ePub Edition August 2020: ISBN 978-0-310-53710-6
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
All Scripture quotations, unless otherwise indicated, are taken from The Holy Bible, New International Version, NIV. Copyright 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc . Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved worldwide. www.Zondervan.com. The NIV and New International Version are trademarks registered in the United States Patent and Trademark Office by Biblica, Inc .
Any internet addresses (websites, blogs, etc.) and telephone numbers in this book are offered as a resource. They are not intended in any way to be or imply an endorsement by Zondervan, nor does Zondervan vouch for the content of these sites and numbers for the life of this book.
No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any meanselectronic, mechanical, photocopy, recording, or any otherexcept for brief quotations in printed reviews, without the prior permission of the publisher.
Cover Design: Brand Navigation
Cover Image: Luhuangfeng / iStockphoto
Interior Design: Kait Lamphere
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Please note that footnotes in this ebook may contain hyperlinks to external websites as part of bibliographic citations. These hyperlinks have not been activated by the publisher, who cannot verify the accuracy of these links beyond the date of publication.
For Andrew, Garrett, and Allie
Couldnt be prouder of the paths youve
chosen and the stories youre writing.
DAD
My dad had a terrible habit.
I thought it was terrible, anyway.
He wouldnt tell me what to do.
Specifically, he wouldnt tell me what to do when I didnt know what to do and wanted him to tell me what he thought I should do.
True, most kids dont want their parents telling them what to do. And I was like most kids most of the time. But on occasion, I wanted him to tell me what to do. And he wouldnt. Worse, instead of answering my questions, he asked me questions! His go-to question was: What are you going to do when Im not around to tell you what to do?
My go-to response was: But you are around, so tell me!
Clearly, his response did not indicate a lack of interest on his part. Just the opposite. As it turns out, I employed the same strategy with my kids... or tried to anyway. Maybe one day theyll write a book about it.
His go-to question wasnt his only question. During middle school and high school, his arsenal of questions included one of the five we will explore later: What is the wise thing to do? As a teenager, that pesky question usually eliminated most of my preferred options. But when I leaned in, it eliminated unnecessary regret as well.
What I didnt appreciate then, that I most certainly appreciate now, was why. Why all the questions? Why not just tell me what he thought I should do? The reason was simple. He was teaching me how to make decisions. Good decisions. He started early. Maybe too early. But to his credit and my advantage, he started when the stakes were low.
Perhaps unbeknownst to him, my dad was teaching me something else as well. That something else is the point of this little book. By opting for questions over direction, my dad connected two important dots for me. Dots many folks never connect. He helped me make the connection between good questions and good decisions. To tease that out a bit, he helped me make the connection between well-placed, appropriately timed, thought-provoking questions and good decision-making. Simply put:
Good questions lead to better decisions.
And better decisions lead to fewer regrets.
This is why, on the back side of a bad decision, its not unusual to hear someone say, I should have asked more questions. Why? Because we know intuitively that the more questions we ask, the more information we acquire, which leads to greater insight and, hopefully, better decisions. But pausing to ponder a list of potentially disruptive questions is neither easy nor intuitive.
Truth is, most of us resist uninvited questions when making a decision. In the moment, we feel like were being questioned rather than simply being asked a question. Big difference. When we confuse one for the other, our defenses go up and our learning aptitude goes down. Its virtually impossible to welcome new information or insight when were convinced our judgment is being questioned. This is especially true when making personal decisions. After all, theyre personal! Translated, its nobodys business.
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