Julian McDonnell - Rather Splendid London Walks: Joolz Guides Quirky and Informative Walks Through the Worlds Greatest Capital City

Laura Willis: for getting this book off the ground, contributions to travelling on the tube and working extremely hard and being patient with me! This book would not exist without you!Robert Timms: always on hand with fact-checking, route-checking, expression-checking! Huge thanks for going above and beyond the call of duty. My mum: thank you for taking me around fun parts of London and telling me rude stories about Lord Byron and everyone else. Alex Edward: for ideas, back-up, design advice and being a stalwart of the Joolz Guides machine!!! Lou Psyche: for the poems and songs in Joolz Guides, ideas, research and help with filming. Mark Myers: for his plaque joke, expertise in taxis and the Beatles and help with filming. Erika Vipas (Evie): thanks for helping to test out the walks and for taking some of the photos. Amir Dotan: advice and expertise on Stoke Newington. The undisputed king of coal hole covers! Harry Ads: for contributing facts and help testing out the Waterloo walk. Steve Buttling-Smith: thank you for your nerdy facts, Sir. Theyd better be right!! Monika Buttling-Smith: always reliable and full of knowledge whenever I needed her, despite always being covered in mud. Celine Luppo McDaid: thank you for showing us around Dr Johnsons House and being so cheerful, helpful and full of knowledge! (And for tolerating my Blackadder impressions.) Joanna Brown: thank you for all your support and advice on historical facts. Michael and Gunilla Wigge: in whose flat I wrote a large portion of this book! Ted Hughes: without whom there would be no Rule of Ted. Margarita Sachkova: for your information on Lenin and a great fun walk! Spencer and Kiera Chaplin: thank you for the wonderful day out sharing information about Charlie Chaplin. Terry St Clair: thanks for all your music and entertaining histories of Covent Garden. Tom Carradine: where would Joolz Guides be without your superb songs and knowledge of the music hall? Kai Hammond: for all your help with the videos (and my secret book)! Rie Ikuno: thank you for helping to test the Stoke Newington walk and putting me on TV in Japan! Sarah Lavelle: for taking me seriously at Quadrille and deciding to publish the book in the first place! And Luke, Ivo and Claire: for making it look fantastic.

Every one of my subscribers: for your continued support and making me feel the effort was all worthwhile.

This is an excellent stroll around some of Londons oldest shops for discerning gentlemen and ladies, with a few dead people thrown in for good measure!

If you are feeling very posh you can arrange to have afternoon tea at THE RITZ, of course, but we are just starting our walk here, a few steps from Green Park tube station. Before crossing the road towards Albemarle Street take note of the window on the corner above the Ritz sign in Arlington Street. In 1921, when Charlie Chaplin returned to his hometown of London for the first time since becoming the biggest film star in the world, he decided to stay at The Ritz. Hed remembered it only just having been built when he was a boy and hed thought how decadent it was, vowing to stay there one day. On his return he was mobbed by thousands of fans and he waved to them from this window. When his grandson, Spencer Chaplin, got in touch to make a Joolz Guides video I arranged for him to wave from this same window. He was thrilled and said it was a very special moment for him, which made me feel very proud. Many celebrities wanted to have dinner with Charlie Chaplin when he stayed here, but he decided to escape through a service lift at the back and travel down to Kennington to see his old house and stomping ground, which he had known as a very impoverished child growing up.

Turn up Albemarle Street and on your left you will see number 50. Since 1768 this has been occupied by a succession of publishers called JOHN MURRAY. (After about the tenth John Murray they stopped operating from this address in 2002, but the family still owns the building.) Upstairs there is a very important fireplace, but it isnt really open to the public and not that easy to get in.

By the time the famous poet Lord Byron died in Greece in 1824, his memoirs had been acquired by John Murray from Byrons friend Thomas Moore. Byron was the equivalent of a superstar pop idol today and had been one of the first people we could call a celebrity. He had a portrait of himself printed on the cover of one of his publications, which could be why he was one of the first celebrities to receive fan mail.

Adoring female fans would write to him to say that their breasts were on fire!

Why, did my breast with rapture glow?

Thy talents to admire?

Why, as I read, my bosom felt?

Enthusiastic fire.

This particular fan also wrote about how she trembled as she gazed upon his portrait.

When Byron was at Cambridge University one of the rules was that you couldnt keep cats or dogs as pets, so he decided hed keep a pet bear instead! He was also famous for sleeping with his half-sister, as well as young boys, and some claim that he invented vampire stories.

In fact, his life was so scandalous that they refused to bury him in Poets Corner at Westminster Abbey. When John Murray read Byrons memoirs, the publisher was so shocked by all his obscene shenanigans that he decided to burn them in the fireplace upstairs, right here! Such a pity. Just imagine how valuable a copy would be today. It would be a bestseller!

Did I mention Byron was a poet? People seem to forget that fact!

Next, at number 13, is what used to be THE ALBEMARLE CLUB, one of the first to admit both men and women. It was here that Oscar Wildes troubles started when the Marquess of Queensberry (who created the rules of boxing) barged in and demanded to speak with Oscar, who was a member here. Oscar had been seeing rather a lot of the Marquesss son, Lord Alfred Douglas, with whom he was having an affair, and the Marquess wasnt best pleased! Of course, the Marquess wasnt granted entrance, and Oscar wasnt there anyway, so he left a card reading: For Oscar Wilde, posing Somdomite (he meant to write sodomite, but the silly bugger couldnt spell). When Oscar returned he was horribly offended and decided to sue the Marquess for libel, but unfortunately it totally backfired. Oscar ended up being convicted of gross indecency and was imprisoned, which was his ultimate downfall.

A little further along is one of Londons oldest existing hotels, BROWNS, opened in 1837 (the same year as Queen Victorias coronation) and its famous for Alexander Graham Bell making the first phone call in London the phone is still there! Browns became popular with monarchs in exile, such as George II of Greece, and many other celebrities including Agatha Christie, Theodore Roosevelt and J.M. Barrie. Rudyard Kipling was said to have finally finished