James Felton - Sunburn: The Unofficial History of the Sun Newspaper in 99 Headlines

Also by James Felton

52 Times Britain was a Bellend

SPHERE

First published in Great Britain in 2020 by Sphere

Copyright James Felton 2020

Illustrator Emanuel Santos 2020

The moral right of the author has been asserted

All rights reserved.

No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form or by any means, without the prior permission in writing of the publisher, nor be otherwise circulated in any form of binding or cover other than that in which it is published and without a similar condition including this condition being imposed on the subsequent purchaser.

A CIP catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library.

ISBN 978-0-7515-8077-8

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For Katie, Hugo and Dylan

In 1969, Rupert Murdoch bought the struggling Sun broadsheet paper and turned it into a number-one bestselling tabloid that would also carry the nickname The Scum.

Having inherited a newspaper from his father in Australia (as you do) and made it more profitable, Murdoch turned his attention to the UK, where he bought Sunday newspaper the News of the World, which you might know from such hits as hacking the phone of a murdered teenager and a name-and-shame campaign against paedophiles which led to vigilante attacks on a paediatricians house (paedophile, paediatrician tomay-to, tom-paedo). But the Sun was the real beginning of an empire that would spread across the pond and give Murdoch the ear of the President of the United States both literally on the phone and because Donald Trump will frothily regurgitate in tweet form whatever he has just seen on Murdochs Fox News.

But back to the Sun. Through it, Murdoch arguably revolutionised the media landscape by creating a paper more interested in desperately entertaining and gaining readers than anything trivial like getting your facts 100 per cent in order, and showing other proprietors that in terms of profit its one hell of a business model.

The Sun has claimed to win elections and appeared to have influence over politicians and politics well beyond what a boob pamphlet might merit. Editors of the Sun have been seen going in and out of Downing Street in a way you just dont see with the people who run Jugs.

If you havent ever read the Sun (and I truly envy you), while the Guardian is like the slightly pious guy in your sociology seminar whos done all the reading and really wants you to know it, and the Daily Mail is like your cantankerous elderly neighbour who almost certainly has Nazi memorabilia hidden away in her attic, the Sun is like your friends friend whos fun to be around at first but ruins every night out at about 3 a.m. by ranting about poofs (a term the Sun used constantly throughout the eighties). And though hes always good with celebrity gossip and chats about which football team are kicking balls the best this year, you wish hed stick to those topics rather than poisoning the mind of your friend with long rants about groups of people he reckons we should be sending back.

For those who dont buy the paper, the Sun and its sister paper the News of the World have had a reputation for sleazy, sensationalist and questionable stories that theyve thoroughly earned throughout the years. I imagine theyd rather people forget how ardently they stuck to this line in stories such as Eastbenders written by Piers Morgan about the first gay kiss on EastEnders and The Truth (arguably their most infamous story) in which they smeared the victims of the Hillsborough disaster with claims that they had pissed on the dead. But if the Sun think its OK to air other peoples dirty laundry, then I think its fair that they have theirs aired in return. Because despite declining circulation figures theyve still felt pushily relevant in the Brexit referendum and recent general elections, in the junior doctors strikes and in their obsession with an actress called Meghan Markle and her unemployed husband.

So whilst Ive been fanning their skid-marked pages, Ive been asking myself these questions:

Are they really the all-powerful newspaper they think they are? Do they really win elections, or just choose to back the people who are obviously going to win, like a weedy kid sucking up to the school bully in the hope that he wont get the crap kicked out of him during the bullys next monopoly commission? Do they influence their readers, or merely attempt to spell out what theyre thinking in order to appeal to them and sell more papers? In short, are they more like a sewage factory pumping out human waste, polluting an otherwise basically clean sea, or like a mirror placed above a toilet, reflecting shit?

A few notes to readers and/or lawyers:

The book will mostly focus on the Sun but will where relevant briefly stray into the now-defunct News of the World.

The book is not just a factual account of stories covered by the Sun, it also contains a lot of my opinion. A ridiculous amount of it, in fact. If something has happened, theres a good chance Ive had an opinion about it that Im about to bore you with at length.

Ive picked ninety-nine stories from across the last fifty years because ninety-nine is as good a number as any and too many books have 101 written on them, the amateurs. Ive arranged stories in categories rather than listing them chronologically, so you can get a sense of the Suns principles across its lifespan and because nothing says humour book like chapters called Misogyny and Prejudice.

Along with the facts, there are some comic exaggerations. Fortunately, theyre so obvious that if you cant spot them youre likely incapable of reading sentences. For instance, if I was to say the News of the World hired a private detective who hacked Milly Dowlers phone whilst she was missing and before her body was found, that would be a factual statement. If I was to say that theres nothing they love more than a missing kid and probably ring the office missing-child bell, punch the air with excitement and sing Were in the Money the moment a white one goes missing, that would be hyperbole. Its a buzzer not a bell.

A lot of the Suns coverage over the years has been awful, but Im of the opinion that that doesnt mean a book about it should be entirely serious and self-important. If youre looking for a complex dive into media theory that cites Baudrillard at every available opportunity Id highly recommend Baudrillard, the absolute narcissist. But if youre looking for a fun and at times horrible overview of the scandalous history of the Sun that I expect theyd rather you didnt see, then youre in the right place. Brace yourself, read on, and above all else dont buy the Sun.

For those of you unfamiliar with the Suns ways, here is a run-down of the key parts.

Sun Says

The Sun Says section of the paper is the editorial or leader: it states an opinion on the news as opposed to neutrally reporting the facts like the rest of the paper also doesnt do. This is the section that makes clear the editorial stance of the paper, and often sounds like the reasonable common-sense talk of an especially gobby racist barfly boring the Wetherspoons staff at 11 a.m. on a Tuesday.