Andri Snaer Magnason - The Casket of Time

• The Weird Woman
  of the North

It was a bright summers day and the birds were singing, but no one seemed to be happy. The nation was in the grip of a situation. Sigruns parents talked of nothing else, hardly glancing up from their newspapers and computers, and the news channels were filled with economists and politicians arguing. Sigrun had become thoroughly fed up with the situation, but she finally managed to drag her parents away from their screens to go buy ice cream and popcorn so they could settle down together at home to watch a comedy show.

On their way to the store they met a man with a sign that read: THE END IS NIGH!

Is that an economist? Sigrun asked.

Shush! said her mother. Dont be silly, child. Economists wear suits.

When they got back home, Sigrun made the popcorn and took it to her parents in the den.

Well, isnt this nice? said her dad, making himself comfortable as they snuggled up on the couch.

The show started, and they forgot everything else and laughed at it for several minutesuntil there was a sudden break.

We are interrupting this transmission because of the situation, the announcer said.

Three economists appeared on the screen. Oh no , thought Sigrun. Not again. They looked like a three-headed giant.

Are there such things as conjoined triplets? she asked.

Shush! her mother said. Dont be silly, we have to listen to this.

In a pained voice, one of the economists began to speak: They say that reports have no feelings, but I swear mine wept when I calculated the situation for the year ahead. Her parents froze, horrified. Sigrun glared at the bowl of popcorn; losing patience, she grabbed the remote control and changed the channel.

NO! her father yelled. This is important! But they didnt miss anything. The economists were on the next channel, too, and the one after that. Sigrun snatched the bowl and went out into the yard.

The evening sun was shining, and the birds were singing. She sat down on the grass and breathed its freshly cut smell, but there was nobody else out enjoying the lovely weather; all their neighbors were transfixed by the gloom and doom on television. Through the window Sigrun eyed her parents, sitting there in the living room. She had finally set up some cozy family time, but this situation had once again ruined everything. On the TV, the economists were replaced by a commercial. Sigrun couldnt hear anything from where she was, but she saw three black boxes dancing on the screen, with the caption: Take control of your time! You only live once! Buy a TimeBox!

Suddenly the front door burst open and her dad sprinted out and jumped into his car.

Where are you going? Sigrun called after him.

Youll see, he said. Weve decided to wait until the situation has cleared up!

Sigrun saw her next-door neighbor also dashing out to her car, and a man farther down the street doing the same.

A short time later, her dad returned carrying a set of large boards covered in Bubble Wrap. Her mom watched closely as he removed the wrapping, grabbed an Allen wrench, and started assembling three black boxes on the living-room floor. Sigrun kept half an eye on what was going on, amusing herself by popping the plastic bubbles.

Were not going to put up with this crisis, her dad muttered. The world cruise will have to wait. He looked sadly at a picture of a sailboat hanging on the wall, and her mother sighed grumpily.

Yes, too right, life wont be worth living if this half-point reduction in the national index is for real, she said.

What happens then? Sigrun asked anxiously.

Aside from the economists, nobody really knows, her mother said, but you can bet it will be bad. A total nightmare.

Though Sigruns father was considered solution-focused and innovative by his business colleagues, he was not much of a handyman. He usually sat all day in front of a computer, so he looked pretty pleased with himself when the black boxes finally stood on the living-room floor, all screwed together and looking like tall, slim refrigerators made of some kind of dark, tinted glass. He set them up in their bedrooms while her mother tidied the house, secured anything that was loose in the yard, backed the car into the garage, and put any food that might go moldy into the freezer. She arranged for the online bank to pay all bills automatically for a whole year in advance, and put a new message on the voicemail: