I DEDICATE this project to the enduring love of my wife, Carlita, and my sons Jelani, Jalil and Jonas.
The greatest moments and times of my life have been spent with all of you. Whether having our hilarious discussions at the dinner table, piling into Moms and my bedroom for family movie night, turning all the house lights off and playing the scary movie game, or even Carlita and I beating the boys in basketball (and tackle football in the yard), my most treasured thoughts are of you four. We are family! But I have taken you all for granted, ignored, and even abused the abundant blessings of our family relationship far too many times. I have let you down, and caused all of you a great amount of pain, confusion and despair.
I sincerely ask for your forgiveness.
I know that the process of forgetting seems nearly impossible, because of the sustained, aggressive assaults in our lives. But I would hope that you all will remember and look for the fruit or the results that accompany my true repentance. It takes time to grow, but I believe that all of you can see the positive transformation taking place within me. Our renewed relationship with God and each other has already taken root and sprouted.
Carlita, Jelani, Jalil, and Jonas, thank you so much for being my crew! Your support, encouragement and godly love has provided the blessed hope of new beginnings. I love you all so very much.
in gratitude
M Y TWO Grandfathers, James B. Kilpatrick and Marvell Cheeks Jr., instilled in me a tremendous respect and appreciation for history. They both firmly believed that going back to the beginning of something is the best way to find original facts; therefore, you find the truth. Thank you, Granddads!
In that regard, I thank my Creator, the One who makes all things possible, the Author of truth. This book is named Surrendered, and so many times while writing it, I experienced inspiration, an idea here or a memory there, that was vital to the work. Each time, it happened not by my power or might, but by His spirit. I surrendered. To God be the Glory.
I am thankful to many for this process. This book, as mentioned earlier, is not casually dedicated to my wife and children, but explicitly. They are truly the wind beneath my wings. Jelanis funny and sarcastic comments, Jalil pretty boy swag moments, Carlitas goober/nerdy expressions, or the awesome spirit-lifting sound of Jonas voice; it all nourishes my soul. Thank you so much, Kilpatrick crew.
I am eternally grateful to my Mom and Dad. Mom, you are one of the most remarkable public servants of our time. Thank you so much for your guidance, support and love, and for never missing a parent/teacher conference, or allowing me to miss homework assignments. You did it all. Dad, thank you for always being authentically you. You told me, when I was ten years old, that you would always be there for me. Through every football or basketball game, election, child birth, triumph or disaster, you were there. Thank you so much for keeping your word. You are still The Man!
To my sister, Ayanna, I thank you immensely. You took this project under your wing and moved it forward, often doing the heavy lifting alone. You organized meetings, conference calls, follow-up strategy, marketing opportunities, etc. You are the bomb! When we were kids, folks called us Kwameyanna, as if we were one person. But I want to tell you, that you have grown into a strong and loving individual, sister and Mom. It was your passion, work ethic, tenacity and organizational skills that got this done. Thank you, Bone!
To my sister, Diarra, who I affectionately call the smartest Kilpatrick of all, thank you, as well. Your encouragement, uncanny wit, comedic talent and love has been a buoy for me. An e-mail, phone call or visit from you would force me to reach beyond the thoughts I bought into at times, and inspire within me a greater awareness of the spiritual light at the center of my being.
I also want to honor my other parents, Carlton and Pamela Poles. Thank you so much for your unyielding love, support and encouragement. You have given Carlita and me an amazingly powerful example of what being united in marriage truly means. I love you both.
To all the descendents of Marvell and Bessie Cheeks (MBC), the greatest family on planet Earth, I thank you all so much for always having my back, front and sides. Also to my Kilpatrick and Simmons extended families, I thank you for your support and encouragement.
No matter how many copies this book sells, it has already been a successful endeavor. I asked Khary Turner, nearly three years ago, to help me do this. He is an outstanding writer, poet and storyteller. I soon became very impressed with his keen thinking skills and infectious positive energy. We developed a rhythm and vibe with one another that transcended our basic notion of writing a book, to a higher calling of spreading knowledge, wisdom and understanding. It was my considerable pleasure to work with Khary on this project.
Im also thankful to Catherine Van Harren, who did an outstanding job editing the project, and went out of her way to consider and understand my story. Thank you, Catherine, for your expertise and insight.
To my 14 line brothers, the ones who crossed the burning sands and joined Alpha Phi Alpha Fraternity Inc., on the evening of March 14, 1990, in Tallahassee, Florida. Nubians, I can never say thank you enough. You looked out for my wife, my children and even kept me from falling so many times. Ive lost a lot of so-called brothers over the past few years, but you all have consistently held up the light of brotherhood. You further cemented, in my spirit, that your commitment was not for that day, but for all of our lives.
In no way do I intend to devalue or disregard the magnitude of the crisis faced, particularly by communities of color, as a result of ongoing mass incarceration, or give any notion of positive credit to what author Michelle Alexander calls Americas new caste system. However, I must say, that I am so much better because of the prison experience. My fall has enabled my life, and my remaining lifes work, to rise. I have met several men, while held behind prison walls, who played a major role in helping to rebuild my character and my life. I am grateful for brothers like; Charles Fish Fisher, Nate Cox, Akil Powell, Corey Nelson, Karl KG Graves, Terry T Tyler, Demetrius Knowledge Wilson, Andy Shoop George, Mark X, Joseph Chip Stines, Marcel Cell Asbell, Jajuan Weezy Gardener, Jerry Oday, Terrence TC Coles, Tony TP Powell, Larry Adams, DeAndre YB Shaw, Larry WB Richards, DeWan Wan Smith, Brian Green, Derrick Shirley, and so many more. Thank you, Brothers! You will NEVER be forgotten.
To my Pastors, Bishops J. Drew Sheard and T.D. Jakes. I remain exceedingly grateful to both of you, for answering your call. God, in His infinite wisdom, caused my life to intersect with yours, at precisely the perfect moments. Your encouragement, honesty, and love provided much needed direction and hope for a new day, for me and my family. I also want to thank the great congregations that you both lead, my Greater Emmanuel Church family in Detroit, and also my Potters House Church family in Dallas. You have been an amazing gift to my family. Your love never fails!