Louise Erdrich
Original Fire: Selected and New Poems
Leave the dishes.
Let the celery rot in the bottom drawer of the refrigerator
and an earthen scum harden on the kitchen floor.
Leave the black crumbs in the bottom of the toaster.
Throw the cracked bowl out and dont patch the cup.
Dont patch anything. Dont mend. Buy safety pins.
Dont even sew on a button.
Let the wind have its way, then the earth
that invades as dust and then the dead
foaming up in gray rolls underneath the couch.
Talk to them. Tell them they are welcome.
Dont keep all the pieces of the puzzles
or the dolls tiny shoes in pairs, dont worry
who uses whose toothbrush or if anything
matches, at all.
Except one word to another. Or a thought.
Pursue the authentic decide first
what is authentic,
then go after it with all your heart.
Your heart, that place
you dont even think of cleaning out.
That closet stuffed with savage mementos.
Dont sort the paper clips from screws from saved baby teeth
or worry if were all eating cereal for dinner
again. Dont answer the telephone, ever,
or weep over anything at all that breaks.
Pink molds will grow within those sealed cartons
in the refrigerator. Accept new forms of life
and talk to the dead
who drift in through the screened windows, who collect
patiently on the tops of food jars and books.
Recycle the mail, dont read it, dont read anything
except what destroys
the insulation between yourself and your experience
or what pulls down or what strikes at or what shatters
this ruse you call necessity.
The Widow Jacklitch
All night, all night, the cat wants out again.
Ive locked her in the kitchen where she tears
From wall to wall. Her bullet head leaves marks;
She swings from tablecloths, dislodges pots.
When Rudy was alive the cat was all
You ever could have wanted in a child, it sat so still
And diligently sucked its whiskers clean. I cram
A doily in my mouth to still the scream.
All night the sweethearts dandle in the weeds.
Its terrible, the little bleats they make
Outside my window. Girls not out of braids
Walk by. I see their fingers hike their skirts
Way up their legs. I say its dirt.
The cats got rubbage on her brain
As well. She backs on anything thats stiff.
I try to keep the pencils out of reach.
That Krger widow practiced what shed preach
A mile a minute. If she was a cat
Id drown her in a tub of boiling fat
And nail her up like suet, out in back
Where birds fly down to take their chance.
I dont like things with beaks. I dont
like anything that makes a beating sound.
Beat, beat, all night they hammered at the truck
With bats. But he had locked himself
In stubbornly as when a boy; Id knock
Until my knuckles scabbed and bled
And blue paint scraped into the wounds. Hed laugh
Behind his door. Id hear him pant and thrill.
A mothers hell. But Id feel the good blindness stalk
Us together. Son and mother world without end forever.
The Ojibwe word for stone, asin, is animate. Stones are alive. They are addressed as grandmothers and grandfathers. The universe began with a conversation between stones.
1
A thousand generations of you live and die
in the space of a single one of our thoughts.
A complete thought is a mountain.
We dont have very many ideas.
When the original fire which formed us
subsided,
we thought of you.
We allowed you to occur.
We are still deciding whether that was
wise.
2 Children
We have never denied you anything
you truly wanted
no matter how foolish
no matter how destructive
but you never seem to learn.
That which you cry for,
this wish to be like us,
we have tried to give it to you
in small doses, like a medicine, every day
so you will not be frightened.
Still, when death comes
you weep,
you do not recognize it
as the immortality you crave.
3 The Sweat Lodge
We love it when you sing to us,
and speak to us,
and lift us from the heart of the fire
with the deers antlers, and place us
in the center of the lodge.
Then we are at our most beautiful,
Powerful red blossoms,
we are breathing.
We can reach through your bones
to where you hurt.
You call us grandfather, grandmother.
You scatter bits of cedar, sage, wikenh, tobacco
and bear root over us,
and then the water
which cracks us to the core.
When we break ourselves open
that is when the healing starts.
When you break yourselves open
that is how the healing continues.
4 Love
If only you could be more like us
when it comes to the affections.
Have you ever seen a stone
throw itself?
On the other hand
whose idea do you think it is
to fly through the air?
Mystery is not a passive condition.
To see a thing so perfectly what it is
doesnt it make you
want to hold it,
to marvel, to touch
its answered question?
5 Gratitude
You have no call to treat us this way.
We allow you to put us to every use.
Yet, when have you ever
stopped in the street to lay your forehead
against the cool, black granite facade
of some building, and ask the stone
to bless you?
We are not impartial.
We acknowledge some forms
of consideration.
We open for those
who adhere to our one rule
endure.
6 Infinite Thought
Listen, there is no consciousness
before birth or
after death
except the one you share
with us.
So you had best learn
how to speak to us now
without the use of signs.
Remember, there will be no hands,
except remembered hands.
No lips, no face,
except remembered face.
No legs and in fact no
appendages, except
the remembered ones,
which always hurt
as consciousness hurts.
Now do you understand what it is?
Your consciousness
is the itch, the ghost of consciousness,
remembered
from how it felt
to be one of us.
Teresa of Avilas brother, Rodrigo, emigrated to America in 1535 and died in a fight with Natives on the banks of the Rio de la Plata.
Footnote to The Life of Teresa of Jesus, translated and edited by E. Allison Peers
Sister, do you remember our cave of stones,
how we entered from the white heat of afternoons,
chewed seeds, and plotted one martyrdom
more cruel than the last?
You threw your brown hair back
and sang Pax Vobiscum to the imaginary guard,
a leopard on the barge of Ignatius.
Now I see you walking toward me, discalced like the poor,
as the dogwood trees come into blossom.
Their centers are the wounds of nails,
deep and ragged. The spears of heaven
bristle along the path you take,
turning me aside.
Dear sister, as the mountain grows out of the air,
as the well of fresh water
is sunk in the grinding sea,
as the castle within rises stone upon stone,
I still love you. But that is only
the love of a brother for a sister, after all,