Dean Peter J. - Breaking into the boys club: the complete guide for women to get ahead in business

MOLLY D. SHEPARD, MS, MSM, founder and president of The Leaders Edge, is a dynamic speaker, author, and community leader. Her Philadelphia-based organization is the foremost leadership development and coaching practice committed to the advancement of senior executive women. Previously, Molly was chairman, president and co-founder of Manchester Inc., one of the worlds largest career development consulting firms. While leading Manchester, she designed an executive format for leaders in transition that became the standard model for the industry. She is the recipient of many industry and community awards and serves on numerous public and nonprofit boards of directors. She is a trailblazer in womens leadership and in navigating the upper echelons of senior management. In 2006, Molly received an honorary doctorate of humane letters from West Chester University.

JANE K. STIMMLER, MLS, has over twenty-five years of experience in business, specifically in strategic marketing planning and communications. She is co-founder and president of The Marketing Edge, a Philadelphia-based marketing consulting and communications firm that has pioneered marketing strategies for financial companies and professional services firms. She has held executive positions in the banking, accounting, and legal industries. She is a university instructor and teaches on the subjects of business communication, organizational politics, and gender differences in the workplace. She frequently writes and speaks on marketing and management subjects, and about women in business. Jane is a recognized thought leader on the topic of womens advancement. She and her husband make their home in the Philadelphia area.

PETER J. DEAN, MS, PhD, is founder and president of Leaders By Design, an international leadership development coaching firm for senior executive men. He has authored nine books, published numerous articles, consulted, coached, and lectured in thirteen countries, and is a sought-after speaker by Fortune 50 companies on the topics of leadership, ethics, change management, performance improvement, and communication. For fifteen years, Peter was a lecturer at The Wharton School of the University of Pennsylvania. Also, he has been on faculty at the University of Iowa, Penn State University, University of Tennessee, and Fordham University. He held the O. Alfred Granum Chair in management at The American College, Bryn Mawr, Pennsylvania, where he designed the master of science in management program with an emphasis in leadership in 2004.

Peter Dean and Molly Shepard are married to each other and are partners in business. They are parents of four children, two of whom live with them in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania.

T HE AUTHORS wish to thank the many women and men whose stories and experiences are included in this book, and who are trying to make the workplace a more balanced and equitable place.

We also acknowledge the wonderful women and men who have attended The Leaders Edge/Leaders By Design leadership development programs seeking to work together in collaboration and find fresh solutions. Our world of work will be a better place because of them.

As always, thanks to the family and friends who provide the support and encouragement to keep us going, and to our agent, Anne Marie OFarrell, for all her good advice.

T ODAY, THERE are two distinctly different faces of leadership in most organizations. These faces are defined by genderand the male approach was virtually alone until the last few decades, when women entered into leadership roles. Although the two have coexisted, one side ultimately tries to dominate the other and it is usually the mens side that wins. When this happens, women often lose out in their efforts to advanceand the organization is confined to using only half of its available talent. If men and women were able to blend the best of their natural styles, they would be more effective, productive, and ultimately, more successful.

Today, however, organizations have not tapped into the full value of women as leaders in the workplace. Our research shows that of the seven interpersonal leadership skills, women excel in: listening, empathizing, attending, ethical analysis, and maintaining respect in conflict, while men stand out in decision making and speaking with authority. The many differences between the sexes, shown in the next chart, hold the possibility of creating positive dynamics in the work cultureif and when they are combined. This is because the strengths and weaknesses of men and women can often offset each other, producing a stronger, more balanced approach.

Though there are exceptions, many people tend to fall into gender-specific behavior patterns. In order to be most powerful, we propose that the skills and strengths of women and men should be combined into what we call the third face of leadership, the key principles of which are:

• Seek to acknowledge differences in the styles of men and women, and put the value of each into a professional context
• Incorporate short- and long-term vision and their consequences into their actions
• Balance their needs/wants with those of others and demonstrate regard for individuals
• Deal respectfully with conflicts and look for resolution
• Connect with others through positive, strategic communication and consider what and how information is being exchanged

Third-face leadership is a dramatic change to the predominant leadership approach in todays business environments, and will need time and energy to advance. This can be a lonely endeavor and involves patience, as others begin to learn this new way of viewing colleagues and thinking about leadership. There are still deep-seated biases and ingrained inertia in todays male-dominated cultures, and a shift involves changing the paradigm. However, there are many positive outcomes to be gained through this change:

• Greater success in the personal growth and development of leaders who understand the issues of gender and have respect for each others value.
• Increased productivity in organizations by decreasing the tension between genders, and by encouraging women and men to use the many different leadership qualities they naturally bring to the workplace.
• More understanding, on the part of men, as to what women bring to leadership positionsand vice versa thereby expanding their range as leaders.
• A healthier balance between family and work as the perspective and the priorities of both men and women are included in setting policy at the top of their companies.
• Fewer ethical scandals in corporations when both men and women are leaders in top companies. (Remember, many of the whistle-blowers in this decades most prominent corporate scandals were women!)