Acknowledgments
This book may have my name as the author but as anyone who has spent any time with me over the last several months knows, it has really been the work of seemingly countless people and hours.
Most important, this book could not have been written without the patients and their families in my practice who have generously allowed me to share their stories in the pages of this book, in the hope of helping others. To you, I send a heartfelt thank-you.
My agent Molly Lyons introduced me to the world of publishing and helped this book become a reality. Thanks for your vision and your encouragement. Wendy Holt, my editor at Da Capo Press, has been amazing; planning a wedding would be enough of a task for anyone, but to work so hard to review, change, and try to perfect a manuscript at the same time is an unbelievable feat. I am very grateful. Thank you to Lissa Warren, my publicist for increasing the mass medias awareness of pediatric bipolar disorder. I would like to thank Annetta K. Miller for her help with the manuscript. Her sensitivity, facility with words, love of these children, and her great sense of humor were invaluable in writing this book.
I am also truly grateful for the support, encouragement, late night sessions, and exceptional writing talents of Shawn Ortiz. Thanks to Carlos and Andres for sharing her with me. I have also been very lucky to have my close friends and colleagues offer to read, add input, and reread the manuscript, during these past several months: Faye Brady, LCW; Michael Osit, PhD; Regina Peter, EdD; Lois Tigay, MSW; Robin Shimel, LCSW; and the Davis and Pyne families. I hope you know how much I appreciate all that you have done to help in this endeavor.
To Faye Cunningham, the woman who made sure my deadlines got met and that my office runs efficiently, thank you. A special thanks as well to Lynne Weisberg, MD; Mary Fristad, PhD; and Stefanie A. Hlastala, PhD for their help with the manuscript.
A warm thank-you to my sister-in-law Claudette Spano for her creative input.
There are not enough words to say thank you to Jackie Tull, a very special woman who helps make daily life run smoothly for my entire family. I am also grateful for the help my brother-in-law, Amos Gern, provided during this whole process. My sister, Evelyn Gern, has been more than anyone could ask for in a sister. I thank her for her unflagging faith in me throughout our lives together. Her support, encouragement, and love, would have made our parents proud.
I thank the major men in my worldmy husband Soly Baredes, MD, and my sons, Ryan and Matthew, for putting up with me being unavailable for so many months. Their support, both mental and physical (including doing the laundry), continually teaches me about lifes riches. I am truly blessed to have the three of you as the center in my life. And last but not least, Thanks to Sunny, my special four-legged friend, for making sure I didnt get too much sleep.
Introduction
My mood swings like a pendulum. Sometimes it swings in one direction and Im way too happy, and sometimes it swings to the other side and Im way too sad. But why cant I be right in the middle and just normal? JORDAN, 11
When Im angry, the bad side of my brain thats red takes over the good side of my brain thats white. JOANNA, 10
I know more about math than the teacher. She should let me teach the class. BILLY, 12
I want to die because I feel so lonely even with people around. CARLOS, 9
Why doesnt God care about me? SOPHIE, 11
My mind is too busy... racing. I think about different parts of a book I read... about school the next day, things like that, and then I end up thinking about fifty things at once. HARRY, 8
Mom, I made you a museum to cheer you up. See, I drew five paintings on the wall. NATALIE, 5
The voices of children with bipolar disorder can be brimming with sweetness, creativity, empathy, and humor. But too often, they are overflowing with pain, anger, opposition, and despairunwelcome by-products of an illness that until recently was not even believed to exist in children.