Laurie Fivozinsky LeComer - A Parents Guide to Developmental Delays: Recognizing and Coping with Missed Milestones in Speech, Movement, Learning, and Other Areas

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Table of Contents

ADVANCE PRAISE FORA Parents Guide to Developmental Delays

Laurie LeComers book provides concerned parents with the information they need to observe and assess their childs area of difficulty. If the information provided in the book supports that there might be a problem, she provides information on what assessments to get and where to go for help. Helplessness turns into action and hope.

Larry Silver, M.D., author of The Misunderstood Child: Understanding and Coping With Your Childs Learning Disabilities

An operating manual for troubleshooting the myriad emotional, behavioral, sensory, educational, and developmental obstacles that can impede childrens healthy, normal development. A Parents Guide to Developmental Delays is an invaluable resource for every parent.

Sam Goldstein, Ph.D., author of Nurturing Resilience in Our Children and Raising Resilient Children

Most Perigee Books are available at special quantity discounts for bulk purchases for sales promotions, premiums, fund-raising, or educational use. Special books, or book excerpts, can also be created to fit specific needs.

For details, write: Special Markets, The Berkley Publishing Group, 375 Hudson Street, New York, New York 10014.

To Victor, and my children.
And in loving memory of my mother,
Marilyn.

Acknowledgments

Words alone cannot express the gratitude and heartfelt thanks I have for the people I am listing here, and who stood alongside me during the book writing process.

I owe so much to my husband, who held down the fort for hours upon hours during the past year. You were my solid rock to lean on, and I could not have done this without you. Thank you for your love and support, Victor. (It definitely came in handy... living with a computer god, too!)

And thank you to my kids, who were patient and tolerant, and who heard the phrase, I have to work on my book, far too many times. Thanks, guys, for helping me in so many special ways, and for trying to have fun with me even when I was, lets say, a little bit tense.

I owe so much to my agent extraordinaire, Judith Riven, who looked, checked, and took the leap. I hope to never have to sell a book without you. You are a pleasure to work with, and it is a wonderful feeling to be contractually attached to someone I trust completely.

Thanks so much to my editor, Marian Lizzi, whose guidance, directness, and sharp intelligence were a gift throughout the process, and thanks to Sheila Curry Oakes for her belief in and support of this project. It was an honor for this book to have landed at Perigee. I am also grateful to Laurie Cedilnik, for her assistance and warmth, Brian Phair, for his careful and meticulous copyediting, and Charles Bjrklund for the wonderful cover art. To Kim Koren and Colleen Barrett, I thank you for your in-house work on this book. And thank you, Adrienne Schultz. You were truly helpful and made an uncertain transition completely painless.

A special thanks to Douglas Rushkoff, for your respect of my idea and your encouragement in the beginning. You have been my blood brother through a couple of my big projects, and I cant wait to see what you and your amazing mind will do next.

Thanks to Kate Kelly for teaching me that a proposal is like a poem; Kitsey Canaan, for holding my hand through the first two chapters, and giving me a good dose of confidence to just move on solo; and thanks to Deborah Herman, who taught me to be mindful and careful about inadvertently making a parent feel blamed, even within the pages of a book.

Thank you to Ellen Talley Lotsky and Melinda Stickel for great discussions, true friendship, and support. Also, thanks to Joan Villegas and Andrea Timchak for conversations that I treasure; your support has helped me to multitask throughout this year. Thank you to Ann Friedman, M.A., CCC-SLP; Kerry Knop, PT; June Gold; Audrey Barrette; Fionnuala Browning; and Jeffrey Tomlinson for their help and expertise. Thank you to the American Occupational Therapy Association and the Occupational Therapy Associations of the states of California, New York, and Massachusetts.

To Julie Russell Seen, OTR/L, a huge thanks for our friendship and conversations. I was so happy to have had the opportunity to work with and treat kids with you. Our conversations over the years definitely had an impact on what was written in this book.

To my Dad, Sherman, and also Carol, Karen, and Jon, thank you for being behind me, and for your excitement with all of the LeComer family endeavors.

I owe a lot to Carol Sissala and Easter Seal Treatment Center, for my early success with autistic children. And thank you to United Cerebral Palsy, Georgetown University Hospital, the University of Maryland, Tufts University, Lesley University, Scarsdale Public Schools, and Greenwich Public Schools.

A special thank-you to the families who have trusted me with their children, and to the children who let me challenge them.

Introduction

As a professional special educator, I work directly with children who have special needs, and their families. I work one-on-one with kids, run special groups, consult with teachers and therapists, and oversee many caseloads by monitoring programs and measuring progress. Along with teams of child professionals, I evaluate and diagnose disabilities.

As a consultant for developmental and behavioral issues, I help doctors, parents, and child organizations understand the importance of diagnosing developmental delays and differences early, as well as the diverse daily struggles faced by children with developmental delays, autism, cerebral palsy, learning disabilities, and a host of other difficulties. I also help parents learn new ways to approach everyday tasks with their children, and I help them understand that the little things they do daily will help their children learn and make progress. I work with doctors to correctly diagnose children, because many pediatricians only see kids for a short snapshot in time. I observe, spend time with, and get down on the floor with many kids to help discern confusing and look-alike symptoms.

As a mother of three, I have experienced my share of fear and concern over my own kids development. I remember when it became apparent that my second child, a toddler at the time, was having difficulty coordinating his motor movements and forming sounds. Although I could usually understand him, other family members and friends would constantly look to my husband and me for clarification. Through my work, I was practiced at keeping an objective distance when working with other peoples children, but seeing my child struggle left me emotionally out of sorts. I remember my son trying his best to communicate with others, and how fiercely protective I became when people pointed out his difficulties. I was beside myself with worry. I felt that if I didnt do something to help him right away, I would be failing him.

When I raised these issues at my sons next well-baby visit, the pediatrician brushed off my concerns. He even suggested with a condescending chuckle that my profession was making me paranoid. Ive since discovered it is all too common for pediatricians to respond to parents legitimate concerns and questions by simply saying Children will develop at their own rates, or You shouldnt compare your children. While these are true statements, they unfairly and unwisely discredit the intimate knowledge parents have of their children.

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