Tews - Felines of New York: A Glimpse Into the Lives of New Yorks Feline Inhabitants

FELINE INHABITANTS

Simon & Schuster Paperbacks

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Copyright 2015 by Jim Tews

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First Simon & Schuster trade paperback edition November 2015

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Interior design by Joy OMeara

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication data is available.

ISBN 978-1-5011-2583-6

ISBN 978-1-5011-2584-3 (ebook)

This book is dedicated to all the cats in the world.

I do your bidding now.

S ome time ago I was walking by a clowder of feral cats in Williamsburg when one of them said to me, Hey, you should take my picture and ask me a few questions. Then post the picture and excerpts from that interview on a website. Maybe you could turn that into a book.

I think someones already doing that with humans, I said.

Yeah, but it would be way funnier with cats.

I had my camera and Id never heard a cat speak, let alone make a specific request, so I obliged. After photographing and interviewing hundreds of cats over several months, I realized that each one of them has a story to tell. Most of those stories involve birds and make little sense, but many of them give a view of New York Id never been privy to. I hope these cats and their stories will give you the same. And if they dont, then just enjoy the pictures, I guess.

M y grandparents immigrated here from New Jersey with nothing, and now I have this box. I wish they could see me. Theyd be, like, How the fuck did you get that box? We never had a box. But I dont know, the box just kind of showed up, so I sat in it.

JEDDY, Lower East Side

I believe climate change is real, but I dont like to think about it. I mean, what if the ocean slowly swallows Manhattan? If the environmental damage caused by humans results in me getting wet, Im not going to be okay with that.

MILO, Upper East Side

M y biggest regret is not finishing college or getting any sort of formal degree. Just imagine where Id be with a decent grad school education. I wouldnt be sitting on this chair, thats for sure. Id probably be sitting in a much nicer chair.

DIDID, Greenpoint

I work from home, which can make me a little stir-crazy. Its important to socialize with anything you can find. Like, sometimes Ill talk to the couch or to the northeast corner of the apartment. If you dont make time for stuff like that, youll go nuts.

EMMA, Williamsburg

A lot of people think we hate Mondays, but thats a dangerous stereotype reinforced by the media. We actually have no idea what day it is.

CHARLIE, Bed-Stuy

Can you really trust anyone? I mean, how do you know? I guess if theyre offering you food, then theyre probably okay, but thats really the only way you can tell.

So, if someone gives you food, you automatically trust him?

If its wet food or real tuna, then yeah, of course. Dry food? Not so much.

WESLEY, Bushwick

T heyve been working on this building across from us for quite a while. The whole block is under construction constantly. I would worry that were going to get priced out of this neighborhood, but I dont pay rent, the guy does. So its kind of his problem.

TOBY, Midtown

We were in Italy once. I remember it pretty vividly. I sat on a really old sofa most of the time.

You dont remember anything else about living in Italy?

I wasnt allowed outside.

NANCY, Williamsburg

Y ou dont want to get too hung up on your own image, your ego. You just have to do what works for you and realize that others are usually in their own heads, worried about themselves. So theyre not really going to care if youre doing something weird. Because theyre probably doing something weird, too.