Louis de Bernières - Red Dog

The real Red Dog was born in 1971, and died on November 20th, 1979. The stories I have told here are all based upon what really happened to him, but I have invented all of the characters, partly because I know very little about the real people in Red Dogs life, and partly because I would not want to offend any of them by misrepresenting them. The only character who is real is John.

There are two factual accounts of Red Dogs life. One is by Nancy Gillespie, first published in 1983, and now out of print. There is a copy in Perth public library, Western Australia. The other is by Beverley Duckett, 1993, obtainable at the time of writing from the tourist office in Karratha, Western Australia, and in local libraries. Dampier and Karratha public libraries also keep press-cuttings about Red Dog, and I wish to thank their librarians for their invaluable and freely given help.

Non-Australians will find a glossary of Aussie terms at the back of the book.

Strewth, exclaimed Jack Collins, that dogs a real stinker! I dont know how he puts up with himself. If I dropped bombs like that, Id walk around with my head in a paper bag, just to protect myself.

Everyone likes their own smells, said Mrs Collins. Jack raised his eyebrows and smirked at her, so she added, Or so they say.

Well, its too much for me, Maureen. Hes going to have to go out in the yard.

Its his diet, said Maureen, eating what he eats, its going to make smells. And he gulps it down so fast, he must be swallowing air.

Tally would let off even if you fed him on roses, said her husband, shaking his head, half in wonder. Shame its a talent you cant be paid for. Wed all be millionaires. You know what I think? We should hire him out to the airforce. You could drop him in enemy territory, hed neutralise it for three days, more or less, and then you could send in the paratroops. Itd be a new era in airborne warfare.

Dont light any matches, hes done it again, said Maureen, holding her nose with her left hand, and waving her right hand back and forth across her face. Tally, youre a bad dog.

Tally Ho looked up at her with one yellow eye, keeping the other one closed for the sake of economy, and thumped his tail on the floor a couple of times. He had noted the affectionate tone of her voice, and took her words for praise. He was lying on his side, a little bit bloated after gnawing on one of his oldest bones. He was only a year old, so his oldest bone was not too old, but it certainly had plenty of flavours, and all the wind-creating properties of which Tally Ho was particularly fond.

Tally was the most notorious canine dustbin in the whole neighbourhood, and people delighted in presenting him with unlikely objects and encouraging him to eat them. With apparent relish he ate paper bags, sticks, dead rats, butterflies, feathers, apple peel, eggshells, used tissues and socks. On top of that, Tally ate the same food as the rest of the family, and at this moment carried in his stomach a goodly load of yesterdays mashed potato, gravy and steak and kidney pie.

This is not to say that Tally ever raided dustbins or browsed on garbage. That would have been very much beneath his dignity, and in any case, he had never found it necessary. He had never lacked success in obtaining perfectly good food from human beings, and ate odd things in good faith, just because human beings offered them to him. He made up his own mind as to what was worth eating again, and whilst he would probably be quite happy to eat more eggshells, as long as they still had some traces of egg in them, he probably wouldnt try another feather.

Im going to take him to the airport, said Jack, he can work off some energy, and get some of that gas out. He went to the door and turned. Tally Ho was looking up at him expectantly, both yellow eyes open this time. His ears had pricked up at the magic word airport.

Run time, said Jack, and Tally sprang to his feet in an instant, bouncing up and down with pleasure as if the floor was a trampoline. The caravan shook and the glasses and cutlery in the cupboard started to rattle. Tally Ho seemed to be grinning with pleasure. He was shaking his head from side to side and yelping.