Anderson - How to back up a trailer: and 101 other things every real guy should know

How to
Back Up
a Trailer

...AND OTHER THINGS
EVERY REAL GUY SHOULD KNOW

Kurt Anderson

Copyright 2008 by Kurt Anderson
All rights reserved.
This book, or parts thereof, may not be reproduced in any
form without permission from the publisher; exceptions are
made for brief excerpts used in published reviews.

Published by
Adams Media, an F+W Publications Company
57 Littlefield Street, Avon, MA 02322. U.S.A.
www.adamsmedia.com

ISBN 10: 1-59869-493-6
ISBN 13: 978-1-59869-493-2
eISBN: 978-1-44051-498-2

Printed in Canada.

J I H G F E D C B A

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
is available from the publisher.

Readers are urged to take all appropriate precautions when undertaking any how-to task. Always read and follow instructions and safety warnings for all tools and materials, and call in a professional if the task stretches your abilities too far. Although every effort has been made to provide the best possible information in this book, neither the publisher nor the author are responsible for accidents, injuries, or damage incurred as a result of tasks undertaken by readers. This book is not a substitute for professional services.

This publication is designed to provide accurate and authoritative information with regard to the subject matter covered. It is sold with the understanding that the publisher is not engaged in rendering legal, accounting, or other professional advice. If legal advice or other expert assistance is required, the services of a competent professional person should be sought.

From a Declaration of Principles jointly adopted by a Committee of the
American Bar Association and a Committee of Publishers and Associations

Many of the designations used by manufacturers and sellers to distinguish their product are claimed as trademarks. Where those designations appear in this book and Adams Media was aware of a trademark claim, the designations have been printed with initial capital letters.

Interior illustrations by Eric Andrews.

This book is available at quantity discounts for bulk purchases.
For information, please call 1-800-289-0963.

This book is dedicated in loving memory of my father, Bill Anderson, who left this world a few years back. He is still with me, though... and no doubt laughing, in his good way, when Im being a knucklehead about one thing or another.

Miss you, Dad.

William Bill Anderson. 19412004

CONTENTS

ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

Id like to thank the following people for their help with this book:

To Justin Neudahl, longtime supporter, an invaluable first reader, and duck-blind buddy, I owe many thanks, most of all for being a friend. The other guys and gals from whom Ive learned real-guy stuff could fill up pages, but Id especially like to thank Adam Janke, Willy Janke, the Ehnes clan, Robert Button Buck Anderson, Wayno Langley, Don Corky Hemsworth, Kurt Johnson, Todd Blom, Rick McRae, and Al Price. To my sisters, Suzie Janke and Becca Karppinen, and my mother, Nita Anderson, thanks for everything, and especially for putting up with Cliff. You know what I mean.

Sometimes the simplest things take on a new wonder when you show them to, or experience them with, fresh eyes: Kolten, Kourtney, Kody, Krystal, Drew, Lindsey, and Joey, you guys (and girls) rock.

Id also like to thank Duane Johnson and Gary Wentz at The FamilyHandyman magazine, two of the nicest guys out there. Their guidance in how-to writing was indispensable. Thanks many times over to Jill Alexander and Katrina Schroeder for their enthusiasm and help in shaping an idea into a book.

This book would not have happened without Jim Donovan, one hell of a fine literary agent and person. Many thanks, chief.

And most importantly, Id like to express my gratitude to my wife, Tina Lee, for keeping an eye on our wonderful sons, Tyler and Carter, while I was writing, for always encouraging me, and for being the best wife a guy could ask for. Love ya, hon.

INTRODUCTION

Heres a shocker: Guys dont know everything. In fact, when it comes to supposedly innate guy knowledge, a lot of us feel like were holding a weak flashlight in a big, dark garage, just trying to figure out how to open up the damn overhead door.

We stand, as the saying goes, on the shoulders of geniuses. Our mechanically ingenious fathers and grandfathers left us a world of complicated machinery in their wake, willing us an incredible amount of should-know technical detail, on everything from electricity to ballistics to physics. Along with the practical stuff, we also inherited arcane yet still-powerful rules of sportsmanship and hard-nosed etiquette, with nuances and intricacies as unfathomable as three-fork place settings. But those geniuses didnt leave us a guidebookor even an instruction manual. No wonder we feel lost from time to time.

Its hard to admit this, especially if youre a guy. We like and admire those handy types who can fix a shoulder-stalled car or rewire a faulty light switch, those practical men who know how to clean a fish and make a smokeless fire to cook it over. We want to be like them, to have that natural confidence that shows through so plainly, even when maybe especially whenthings start going to hell.

Well, nobody is born knowing how to shuffle cards or fillet a fish, and even the most experienced mechanic was probably baffled the first time he changed oil. Unless, of course, someone showed him the way first. And if there was nobody there to show him the way, he went ahead and figured it out all by himself. In an increasingly busy world, and one in which fathers are not always around, learning stuff yourself sometimes seems like the only option.

Well, learning things the hard way can be both entertaining and memorable. Yet Ive suffered enough broken bones and bruises on my ego to realize that sometimes the hard way is, well, just hard, with no redeeming value. It doesnt hurt to take a little advice now and then, because this isnt stuff were born with.

But it is stuff you should know.

This book is a guide into the world of real guys, a fascinating place full of hidden secrets and clever solutions, a world that everyone, man or woman, should at least visit from time to time. Ive learned these things on the water and in the garage, from strangers and friends and, most importantly, from my dad. Ive been luckyIve known some incredible people. Theyve shown me some incredible stuff, and Ive learned a few things on my own, too.

Still, it hasnt always been a smooth ride. In the following pages, youll see plenty of ways to screw things up, even when you think you know what youre doing. There are a couple ways to deal with these failure you can cover them up and hope nobody notices, or you can have a good laugh and share your misfortunes with your buddies in the hope that theyll avoid the same mistakes. And if youre really proud of your screw-ups, I guess you write a book about them.

The truth is, there are many specialists in todays world but few general handymen. And while nobody will fault you for not knowing how to power up a nuclear reactor or finding all the loopholes in your 1040, youll be judged by a different standard when the car stalls, the house goes dark, orGod forbidthe keg quits working. It is here, on the shoulders of dark roads and the basements of old houses, that the tips in this book will become invaluable.

There are no all-knowing men. None. Not your mechanic nor your electrician, not even the old codger that lives down the road, eking out a living by repairing lawnmowers (well, hes probably pretty close). Sometimes, just being able to share your misery is the first step toward walking out of it. In these pages, youll see that there are plenty of those mistakes to be madeIve gone ahead and explored a good majority of them. They might not be fun at the time but they sure are a learning experience. And they make for some interesting stories.