Pattinson Judith - Erebos

Dedication

For Leon U.P.

For S, J & P J.P.

Contents

It always begins at night. At night I feed my plans on darkness. If there is one thing I command in abundance, it is darkness. Darkness is the ground that will nurture what I desire to grow.

I would always have chosen night over day and the basement over the garden, given the chance. Its only after sunset that the deformed creatures of my mind dare to venture from their bunkers to breathe icy air. They are waiting for me to lend their misshapen bodies a grotesque beauty. After all, a lure must be attractive so the prey only becomes aware of the hook when it sits deep in the flesh. My prey. I almost want to embrace it, without knowing it. In a way, I will do that. We will be one, in my spirit.

I have no need to seek out the darkness; it is always around me. I release it like my breath. Like the transpiration of my body. Nowadays people shun me; that is fine. They all creep around me, whispering, uneasy, fearful. They think its the stench that keeps them at bay, but I know its the darkness.

Ten past three already, and still no sign of Colin. Nick pounded the basketball on the asphalt, dribbling first with his right hand, then his left, then his right again, making a short, singing drone with each ground contact. He tried to keep up the rhythm. Twenty more timesif Colin hadnt arrived by then, hed go to practice by himself.

Five, six. It wasnt like Colin not to show without an explanation. He knew perfectly well how quick their coach was to kick someone off his team. Colins cell wasnt on either; it was a sure bet hed forgotten to charge the battery. Ten, eleven. But forgetting about basketball too, and his friends and his team? Eighteen. Nineteen. Twenty. No Colin. Nick sighed and shoved the ball under his arm. Well, that was okaytoday, hed finally score the most baskets.

Practice was brutal, and after two hours Nick was soaked in sweat. He hobbled into the shower on aching legs, stood under the stream of hot water, and closed his eyes. Colin still hadnt turned up, and Frank Bethune had gone crazy, as expected. The coach had taken all his anger out on Nick, as if it was his fault that Colin had been absent.

Nick put shampoo on his head and washed his long hair (way too long, in Bethunes opinion), then tied it back into a ponytail with a worn-out rubber band. He was the last to leave the gymnasium. It was already getting dark outside. On the way down the escalator to the Underground, he got his cell out of his bag and hit the speed dial for Colins number. The voice mail picked up after the second ring, and Nick hung up without leaving a message.

Mom was lying on the couch, reading one of her hairdressing magazines and watching television.

Theres only hot dogs tonight, she said, almost before Nick had closed the door behind him. Im completely worn out. Can you get me an aspirin from the kitchen?

Nick dumped his gear in the corner, limped to the kitchen, and tossed an aspirinvitamin C tablet in a glass of water. Hot dogs. Great. He was starving to death.

Isnt Dad home?

No, hes going to be late. Its a colleagues birthday.

Nick scanned the fridge on the off chance that there was something more desirable than hot dogsmaybe the leftovers from yesterdays pizzabut no luck.

What do you think about that business with Sam Lawrence? Mom called from the living room. Can you believe it?

Sam Lawrence? The name sounded familiar, but he couldnt put a face to it. When he was exhausted, like today, his mothers coded messages really got on his nerves. He served up the anti-headache cocktail shed ordered and thought about popping a tablet himself.

Were you there when they came to get him? Vera Gillinger told me the story today while I was doing her highlights. She works at the same company as Sams mother.

Help me out here. Does Sam Lawrence go to my school?

Mom eyed him with disapproval. Of course he does. Hes only two years behind you. Now hes been suspended. Didnt you hear about the whole drama?

No, Nick hadnt, but his mother was happy to fill him in.

They found weapons in his locker! Weapons! Apparently there was a gun and two switchblades. Where does a fifteen-year-old get a gun from, can you tell me that?

No, said Nick truthfully. He hadnt heard a thing about the drama, as his mother called it. He thought about the massacres that sometimes occurred at American schools and gave an involuntary shiver. Were there really such sick people in London? At his school? His fingers itched to ring Colin. He might know more about it. But Colin wasnt answering, the lazy bum. Just as well, maybe, because Mom was probably exaggerating again. This Sam Lawrence had probably only had a water gun and a pocketknife on him.

Its terrible, all the things that can go wrong as children grow up, his mother said, and gave him a look that meant my precious bunny, my little one, my baby, you wouldnt do such a thing, would you?

It was an expression that always made Nick wish he really could move in with his brother.

Were you sick yesterday? You should have heard Bethune swearing!

No. Im fine. Colins red-rimmed eyes were fixed on the wall of the school corridor next to Nicks head.

Are you sure? You look awful.

Positive. I just didnt get much sleep last night. Colin glanced briefly at Nicks face before he went back to staring doggedly at the wall. Nick stifled a snort. Since when had lack of sleep mattered to Colin?

Were you out somewhere?

Colin shook his head and his dreadlocks swung back and forth.

Fine. But if its your dad again, and hes

Its not my dad, okay? Colin pushed past Nick and walked into the classroom, but he didnt sit down at his desk. Instead, he strolled over to Dan and Alex, who were standing by the window, totally absorbed in their conversation.

Dan and Alex? Nick blinked in disbelief. The two of them were so uncool that Colin called them The Freaks. Freak One, Dan, was distinctly on the short side, and you got the impression he was trying to make up for it with his exceptionally fat behind, which he loved to scratch. Freak Two, Alex, had a face that changed from couch-potato white to stop-sign red at record speed every time someone spoke to him. Every time.

Was Colin intending to audition for the role of Freak Three?

I dont get it, Nick muttered.

Talking to yourself? Jamie had come up behind him, slapped him on the back, and sent his shabby bag skidding right across the classroom. He grinned at Nick, revealing the most crooked set of teeth in the entire school.

Talking to yourself is a bad signone of the first symptoms of schizophrenia. Are you hearing voices as well?

Oh, shut up! Nick gave Jamie a friendly shove. Its just that Colins getting friendly with the Freaks.

He glanced over again, and did a double take. Hang on. That wasnt getting friendlythat was groveling. Colins face wore a pleading expression Nick had never seen before. Instinctively, he moved a couple of steps closer.

I dont see what the problem is if you give me a few tips, he heard his friend say.

I cant do that. Stop making a fussyou know that perfectly well, said Dan as he crossed his arms over his flabby belly. He had a bit of egg yolk stuck on his school tie from breakfast.

Come on, its no big deal. And its not like Im going to tell anyone.

Alex was looking over at Dan uncertainly, but it was clear from Dans face how much he was enjoying the situation.

Forget it. Youre always so full of ityoull have to figure your way out of this yourself.

At least

No! Just shut your trap, Colin!