Kristine Scarrow - The Gamers Guide to Getting the Girl

Copyright Kristine Scarrow, 2019

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise (except for brief passages for purpose of review) without the prior permission of Dundurn Press. Permission to photocopy should be requested from Access Copyright.

All characters in this work are fictitious. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Cover Image: istock.com/chuckchee
Printer: Webcom, a division of Marquis Book Printing Inc.

Library and Archives Canada Cataloguing in Publication

Title: The gamers guide to getting the girl / Kristine Scarrow.
Names: Scarrow, Kristine, author.
Identifiers: Canadiana (print) 20189067764, Canadiana (ebook) 20189067772, ISBN 9781459744769 (softcover), ISBN 9781459744776 (PDF), ISBN 9781459744783 (EPUB)
Classification: LCC PS8637.C27 G36 2019 | DDC jC813/.6dc23

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Nous remercions le Conseil des arts du Canada de son soutien. Lan dernier, le Conseil a investi 153 millions de dollars pour mettre de lart dans la vie des Canadiennes et des Canadiens de tout le pays.

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For all those who feel like misfits in the world:
Stay true to you you are perfect as you are. You were made for incredible things in this world. Believe it.

Geeky, pubescent boys arent the only patrons at Gamers Haven on this Saturday, and that is a rarity. The only females we usually see in the place are middle-aged moms looking for gifts for their sons at Christmastime or their birthdays. Otherwise, the clientele is all about the same. There isnt a dress code for the store, at least not one that we are aware of, but the standard gamers outfit is usually the same: a comic-inspired T-shirt, loose-fitting jeans that have to be continually hiked up because gamers dont believe in belts apparently, and some Converse sneakers well-worn and dirty. Most of us have shaggy hair that may or may not have been washed or combed, and we all look like were chronically tired; if one were to take a poll to see how many customers had purchased Monster Hunter: World on its release day, the tired eyes would be explained.

Its Cooper who tips me off to the girl in the store. Because Gamers Haven isnt known as the place to find girls, no one usually pays much attention to who comes in. Im in the zone playing Sea of Thieves when Cooper starts elbowing me.

Mess off, Coop. Youll get your turn. I shake him off with my hand in between plays.

Your loss, Zach. Cooper turns on his heel and strides away. I whip my head around quickly to see what hes so excited about, and then I see her.

Shes wearing a denim skirt, purple suede knee-high boots, a bright orange T-shirt, and a rainbow-coloured scarf around her neck. Her auburn hair is pulled into a high ponytail, and the bottom of it almost reaches the base of her spine. Her arms are bare and pale. I cant help but stare at her profile. I abandon the game and rush after Cooper, hoping to catch a better glimpse of the girl.

Shes standing in front of the Zelda display. I could pretend that Im buying it and make small talk with her. But what would I say? Come here often? You like this game? Ever play this before? All of it sounds lame. But I decide I have to rush in before Cooper does. I pick up my pace, but Cooper detours to the Okami HD display instead. He isnt trying to show me the girl? His eyes were on something else instead? Was he crazy?

Im happy that hes distracted by something else, but now I have to try to play it cool and get closer without her thinking Im a total stalker. I move one display over and turn my head as casually as I can. Shes reading the back of a Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild case. Stray locks of her hair curl around her face. Shes wearing soft makeup, and when she looks back up toward the display, I can see her bright green eyes. Shes even more beautiful than I thought.

I have a stunning burst of courage and decide to act on it before I never see her again.

Need any help? I ask. She doesnt even look up at me.

You work here?

Uh, no. But I happen to know a lot about video games. Like the one youre holding its been popular in the gaming world for a couple of years now. Maybe I can help with her decision-making.

But is it as good as Ocarina of Time or Twilight Princess?

I dont mean for my jaw to hang open, but it does.

Because it seems to me that this interface is a lot less sophisticated than the one in Twilight Princess.

She finally looks up at me, just in time for me to close my mouth again.

Youre a gamer? I ask.

If thats what you want to call me, she responds. Is that allowed? Or are you going to tell me its a guy thing and I should move on to something a little more girly? Her voice is bitter.

No, not at all! I say, putting my hands up in front of my chest like Im being arrested. I think thats awesome!

She steps closer, her long ponytail swishing toward me, and I can smell her shampoo, a combination of honey and coconut. I want to drink it all in, her smell, her eyes, the fact that the goddess gamer of my dreams is standing in front of me.

Im not sure its worth the money. Honestly, I think Ill wait for the next sequel.

She sets the plastic case down and turns to leave. I want to follow her, ask her more questions, and find out her name, but she turns so fast I just sputter nonsense to myself.

Hi, Im Zachary. Its so nice to meet you, I whisper, holding out my hand for the now-invisible girl to shake. You know, if I were you, Id wait for the sequel. Better interface. That could have gone so much better.