Kristin Mahoney - Elfie Unperfect

I dont know why people think goodbyes are hard. I had to say a whole lot of goodbyes on my last day of fourth grade back in June, and it was easy.

The reason I had to say so many goodbyes was that I was not planning to return to Cottonwood Elementary for fifth grade. Instead, I would be at Hampshire Academy, a private school two towns away. Cottonwood Elementary is a regular, everyday, boring public school. Hampshire Academy is (as I learned on their website) an Institution with a Tradition of Honor and Excellence.

And the reason it was easy to say so many goodbyes at Cottonwood is that I was happy to leave. Even though I had been there since kindergarten, I had never exactly fit in. I tried to fit in. I raised my hand to help my classmates when they gave wrong answers. I offered to take the lead on all group projects and shared all my best ideas. And when I noticed that the cafeteria was particularly noisy at lunchtime, I tried to start a Student Lunch Monitor program.

But it turned out no one else wanted to be a student lunch monitor. It was just Assistant Principal Eastman and me, reminding kids to use their inside voices and throw away their food wrappers. Assistant Principal Eastman asked if I wanted to stop the program and let her handle it with the cafeteria staff, but I said no, I would soldier on. It was an important effort. (Besides, as long as I was working as a monitor, I could eat my lunch standing up, and I didnt have to worry about finding a place to sit each day.)

So my life at Cottonwood Elementary School had been far from perfect. None of the other kids shared my priorities.

Even the one kid at Cottonwood who had known me the longest didnt understand me at all. That would be my cousin, Jenna, who was seven weeks younger than me, lived one mile away, and was about as different from me as a person could be. Jenna was not very interested in schoolwork, or peaceful lunchtimes, or science. She was very interested in talking with her friends during school, talking about her friends after school, and planning what she was going to do with her friends on weekends. Jenna had a lot of friends.

Jennas dad, my uncle Rex, was my moms brother. Uncle Rex and Jenna came over to our house a lot, especially when Aunt Stephanie, Jennas mom, was traveling for work.

I guess I should say Jenna used to come over a lot. Now when Uncle Rex comes over, Jenna usually goes to Esme Carters house, or to the house of one of her other friends. That was fine with me.

Being forced to spend time with Jenna at home was bad enough, but she was also in my class at school last year, and that was even worse. Particularly when we had to do group projects together. Shudder.

But that was all going to change tomorrow. Tomorrow I was starting at Hampshire Academy, where I was sure the cafeteria would be peaceful, the other students would be focused on academic success, and the group projects would go just as I wanted them to. (Maybe there wouldnt even be group projects at all! That would really be excellent.)

Life at Hampshire Academy was going to be perfect.

It had to be.

Mom and Dad got home from work at around the same time that night. It was our tradition on the last night of summer vacation to go for a special pancake dinner at my favorite restaurant, Mugsys.

I wanted Rhoda, my babysitter, to go with us. Rhoda has taken care of me since I was a few months old. She is truly one of the greatest people in the world.

But when I asked her to come along, she said she couldnt because she had to study. Rhoda started nursing school this year, and it seemed to be taking a lot of her time. A year ago, she never would have turned down a Mugsys pancake dinner, but now she had other things on her mind.

Mom gave Rhoda a sympathetic nod when she explained that she had a biology exam the next day.

I hope you can get some rest tonight, Mom said. You look exhausted. And pale.

Oh, Im just a big ball of stress lately, Rhoda said. This bio class is kicking my butt.

Mom told Rhoda she should go straight to bed when she got home. Rhoda laughed and said maybe shed sleep when nursing school was over.

Once we were settled into a booth at Mugsys, I ordered my usual: chocolate chip pancakes. Mom and Dad got blueberry.

While we waited for our food, I asked Mom and Dad about something that had been bugging me. Why does Rhoda have to go to nursing school? She already has a great job working for us.

Well, Elf, we wont need a sitter for you forever, Mom said. Besides, this is something Rhoda has wanted for a long time.

How long? I asked. I mean, Rhoda has been my babysitter for ages; shes really like my third parent. Has she been secretly wanting another job this whole time?

Well, she first mentioned it years ago, when you were in kindergarten, Mom said. That was when you were running to try to get a look at a meteor shower and banged your head on your telescope. Rhoda was so good at getting the bleeding to stop right away. When I complimented her on that, she said shes always been good in emergencies, and shed often thought of becoming a nurse.

I never knew that.

Sure you did, Mom argued. We talk about that telescope story all the time. We were surprised you didnt get a scar. She slid my bangs away from my face so she could touch the spot above my right eyebrow where the cut had been.