Wendy Shanker - Are You My Guru?: How Medicine, Meditation & Madonna Saved My Life

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Table of Contents

PRAISE FOR

Are You My Guru?

I love this book. I love Wendy. As she determinedly searches for physical health (and some bliss on the side), youll relate to what she eats, why she prays, who she lovesand how she somehow manages to laugh through every challenge. Wendy continues her mission to help women accept and appreciate our bodies. Her hilarious storytelling provides an incredible opportunity for us to empower ourselves around the choices we make, not only to live but to thrive.

Ricki Lake

If you think that finding faith cant be funny, then you havent read Wendy Shanker. Her book just might restore your sanity (and is much less fattening than a box of brownies).

Annabelle Gurwitch, coauthor of You Say Tomato, I Say Shut Up: A Love Story

Wendy induces awe for her strength and tenacity. Her wit and positive outlook will inspire many struggling with any illness, whether it be physical or one of the heart. I walked away very satisfied.

Crystal Renn, author of Hungry: A Young Models Story of Appetite, Ambition, and the Ultimate Embrace of Curves

An excellent and entertaining reminder that taking responsibility for ones own health can result in the best medicine.

Frank Lipman, MD, author of Revive: Stop Feeling Spent and Start Living Again

A poignant, heartbreaking, and hilarious chronicle of illness and healing.

Susan Shapiro, author of Lighting Up and Speed Shrinking

No matter whats ailing you: Are You My Guru? will help you feel better. Wendy Shanker strikes just the right balance between Western and alternative medicine.

Louis J. Aronne, MD, FACP, clinical professor of medicine,
Weill-Cornell Medical College

You cant flip a channel, swing a stethoscope, or shop for ground flax seed without encountering an expertdegreed, self-styled or divinely enlightenedwho professes to have the answers. And it doesnt hurt to listen. But Shankers messagethat YOU are the ultimate authority on youis one wed be fools not to apply to any situation where our health and/or happiness is at stake. Shankers deliveryearned gallows humor mixed with honest appreciation for even the rawest of deals, sprinkled with pop-culture sugar to make it go down easyrenders her story of changing her posture in life in light of a life-changing illness too intensely entertaining to put down.

Stephanie Dolgoff, author of My Formerly Hot Life:
Dispatches from Just the Other Side of Young

PRAISE FOR

The Fat Girls Guide to Life

A brave, funny, empowering, funny, necessary (and did I mention funny?) book. The Fat Girls Guide to Life is chicken soup for the big girls soul.

Jennifer Weiner

Funny, feminist, fat, friendly, and fierce. Its food. Its fulfilling.

Eve Ensler, author of The Vagina Monologues

Funny enough to make even die-hard dieters consider replacing their baby carrots with Krispy Kremes.... Shanker takes on the media, corporate America, and even the medical establishment, arguing with their belief that its impossible to be both fit and fat.... Anyone who has ever tried to lose a pound will gain confidence and a sense of humor from Shankers story.

Publishers Weekly

This bold, brainy book debunks obesity myths, examines societys prejudices, and tells heavy gals they can be fat, fit, and fabulous!

Us Weekly

This frank and funny look at living large in America will resonate with any woman who has obsessed over her body image.

Chicago Sun-Times

Jagged little pills of body-image wisdom.

Allure

Shankers humor hits its mark.

Bust Magazine

Put on your seat belt and enjoy the fun-filled, wacky ride!

Emme, supermodel

Both funny and practical, offering advice on how to feel and look great the way you are, all with Shankers trademark wit.

Times Herald Record (N.Y.)

Brutally honest, occasionally conflicted, wryly funny, and sadly poignantworth a read for any woman, regardless of her size.

Detroit Metro Times

No matter what size you are, youll get a heaping dose of self-esteem from this awesome girl-power book.... Dont miss it.

Twist

A funny and frank look at body image.

Shape

Hilarious and informative.

New York Daily News

To Tracy & Sam

Names and certain details have been
changed to protect identities and institutions.

This book is not meant to endorse or dismiss
any particular treatment or practitioner. To the
best of my knowledge, the specialists I worked
with had the most honorable intentions and
tried to perform to the best of their abilities.

So did I.

We of the postfeminist generation grew up being told we could do anything, be anything, if we just put our minds to it. Yet, if we have the power to create our own fates, wouldnt the corollary be that were also responsible for our own misfortunes? And, in a kind of double magical thinking, shouldnt we be able to cure ourselves using the same indefatigable will?

Peggy Orenstein, Stress Test,
The New York Times Magazine, December 28, 2008

INTRODUCTION

Whos That Girl?

Madonna has a sick body.

She lured me in with the sensual softness of her Like a Virgin phase; inspired me with the provocative androgyny of the Express Yourself era; and impressed me with the firm ballet-barre derriere of her Dance Floor days. Today her every muscle is defined with such intensity that her veins look like long ropes of licorice. She wears that little red string on her left wrist rain or shine, sweat or video shoot, to represent her connection to the Jewish mystical study of Kabbalah. Yeah, I think she looks a little extreme, but I wouldnt mind being in such fantastic shape that I could tour the world with a two-hour dance fest at the age of fifty. Madonna outswivels Beyonc, and thats no easy task.

Every body tells a story. Heres my quickie interpretation of Madonnas: The longer shes been around, the more shit she has to take, the tougher her skin gets. Her body has become a missile-defense shield against criticism. At the same time, shes a weapon. She looks like she could crush your head between her thighs while shes prancing around singing Holiday. You dont mess with Madonna. To me, she is an example of unrelenting strength.

I also have a sick body. Not fabulous like Madonnas; I mean, literally sick. In 1999, I was diagnosed with a rare, vascular autoimmune disease called Wegeners granulomatosis. At the end of 2003, it flared like Russell Crowe in a hotel lobby. Wegeners caused my immune system to work overtime, fighting an invader that wasnt there. No one is certain how one contracts vascular autoimmune diseases, which include lupus, scleroderma, and hyperthyroiditis, and no one knows how to cure them. Doctors treat serious autoimmune diseases like they do cancer, with a combination of steroids and chemotherapy, hoping to crash and burn the system into a long-lasting remission. There are 50 million Americans living with autoimmune diseases, and more than 75 percent are women.

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