Karen Edmisten - Deathbed Conversions: Finding Faith at the Finish Line

Endorsements for Deathbed Conversions: Finding Faith at the Finish Line, by Karen Edmisten

I love this book. It has all the attractive power of the supermarket tabloids big celebrity names, sex, violence, everything but aliens but with the grace, eloquence, and profundity of Augustines Confessions. It will be the book you most enjoy reading this year.

Mike Aquilina, EWTN host and author of The Fathers of the Church

Lively, engaging stories of conversion that will encourage us to accept the offer of Gods friendship in Jesus Christ and to encourage others to do so sooner rather than later.

The Most Reverend George J. Lucas, Archbishop of Omaha

Deathbed Conversions: Finding Faith at the Finish Line is unquestionably a most unique and fascinating book. Author Karen Edmisten has woven compelling and inspiring stories together, which will absolutely stir your heart you wont be able to put it down!

Donna-Marie Cooper OBoyle, EWTN host and best-selling author of sixteen Catholic books, including Catholic Moms Caf: 5-Minute Retreats for Every Day of the Year

Deathbed Conversions

Finding Faith at the Finish Line

Karen Edmisten

Our Sunday Visitor Publishing Division
Our Sunday Visitor, Inc.
Huntington, Indiana 46750

The Scripture citations used in this work are taken from the Catholic Edition of the Revised Standard Version of the Bible (RSV), copyright 1965 and 1966 by the Division of Christian Education of the National Council of the Churches of Christ in the United States of America. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

Every reasonable effort has been made to determine copyright holders of excerpted materials and to secure permissions as needed. If any copyrighted materials have been inadvertently used in this work without proper credit being given in one form or another, please notify Our Sunday Visitor in writing so that future printings of this work may be corrected accordingly.

Copyright 2013 by Karen Edmisten. Published 2013.

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All rights reserved. With the exception of short excerpts for critical reviews, no part of this work may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means whatsoever without permission in writing from the publisher. Contact: Our Sunday Visitor Publishing Division, Our Sunday Visitor, Inc., 200 Noll Plaza, Huntington, IN 46750; ; 1-800-348-2440.

ISBN 978-1-61278-612-4 (Inventory No. T1308)

eISBN: 978-1-61278-328-4

LCCN: 2013948681

Cover design by Lindsey Riesen

Cover photos by Granger

P RINTED IN THE U NITED S TATES OF A MERICA

Dedication

With deepest gratitude to everyone who ever uttered a prayer for me. And for Heather, Mauren, Emma, and Kelton.

The Convert

by G.K. Chesterton

After one moment when I bowed my head

And the whole world turned over and came upright,

And I came out where the old road shone white,

I walked the ways and heard what all men said,

Forests of tongues, like autumn leaves unshed,

Being not unlovable but strange and light;

Old riddles and new creeds, not in despite

But softly, as men smile about the dead.

The sages have a hundred maps to give

That trace their crawling cosmos like a tree,

They rattle reason out through many a sieve

That stores the sand and lets the gold go free:

And all these things are less than dust to me

Because my name is Lazarus and I live.

Contents

Buffalo Bill
(William Frederick Cody)

Dutch Schultz
(Arthur Flegenheimer)

Chapter 1

Dont Ever Give Up

Im looking for loopholes, W.C. Fields supposedly quipped on his deathbed as he flipped through a Bible.

Deathbed conversions sound suspiciously like loopholes, like unfair, unaccounted for, last-minute ducks inside the pearly gates. When he heard that I was writing this book, a relative snorted and asked me, Do you really believe in those things? Another friend smirked, shook her head, and said, Those deathbed conversions arent fair, yknow.

The thought of a deathbed conversion inspires a host of reactions, usually strong ones. Some people relish the idea of last-minute U-turns. Theyre heartened by these conversion stories or know someone who knew someone who experienced finish-line contrition. They love to hear about others spiritual treks, and sigh with satisfaction that lost sheep have been found. After all, an honest-to-goodness deathbed conversion offers everything good storytelling demands: drama, pathos and sin, despair, chaos, confusion, love, enlightenment, and, finally, redemption.

On the other hand, there is the Smirk-and-Snort Contingent. Such skeptics dont believe that genuine conversion occurs late in life. They dont believe people can authentically change, or they suspect duplicitous, mercenary motives. Some chafe at the unfairness factor. Why should the rest of us kill ourselves being good all our lives when those lifelong slackers get a final-hour free ticket into heaven? Who let them cut in line anyway?

Living ones entire life without God, though, is hardly a free ticket. A true deathbed convert doesnt rub his hands together at the final hour, snickering, Hey, I pulled a fast one on the Big Guy! Rather, he sees the tragedy of a wasted lifetime, the pain of his prolonged denial, and the foolishness of his stubborn Non Serviam. The only glee is the relief and gratitude that Gods mercy is offered and poured out to us until the final and bitter end.

Because we can never know what is happening in another persons heart and mind, we dont have an inkling who is quietly seeking God, or how long they may have been doing so. The heart of another is a dark forest, always, said Willa Cather in her novel The Professors House, no matter how close it has been to ones own. We cant see for certain when or how someone has begun inching toward Him. We can size up a persons outward actions: we know what is objectively sinful or intrinsically evil. But theres a reason that the Church never definitively answers the question, Who is in hell? While the Church does, through the process of canonization, highlight examples of holiness for the faithful to emulate, she never makes a pronouncement about who has been damned. Thats because we cant know the state of another persons soul. Let us repeat that: we cant know the state of another persons soul.

Oscar Wilde, one of the subjects of this book, said, Ones real life is so often the life that one does not lead. Real life our interior, mental, emotional, and spiritual processes is at the heart of conversion, and at the heart of this book.

The Unseen Other

Weve probably all had the jarring experience of discovering a secret about someone we thought we knew. What? we sputter, stunned at revelations from the mundane (You hate Reeses Peanut Butter Cups? No one hates them) to the life-altering (You couldve told me about the baby and the adoption I would have understood). Knowing the heart of another is a tricky thing. We spend our lives fumbling through circumstances and relationships that will mold us into the finished products we will become. Every thought and choice, every day, month, and year bring more sharply into focus who we are and what we want to be. Some happy souls stride through life with firm purpose and a grounded identity, and they remain true to that identity their entire lives. I remember one year when I was helping with the RCIA program at my parish. Each team member had been asked to give a witness talk. One sweet woman, the wife of a deacon, was reluctant. I asked her what was wrong. I dont have a story, she told me shyly. Ive always believed.