Edgar Gomez - High-Risk Homosexual

High-Risk Homosexual is a keen and tender exploration of queer identity, masculinity, and belonging. From the cockfighting ring in Nicaragua, where he was taken by his uncles to learn how to be a man, to Pulse nightclub in Orlando, where he witnesses freedom and joy on the dance floor, Edgar Gomez writes with honesty and humor about the difficulty of straddling boundaries and the courage of finding oneself. This book signals the arrival of a major new talent.

Laila Lalami, author of Conditional Citizens: On Belonging in America and The Other Americans

High-Risk Homosexual is like a delicious cocktail: sharp, nuanced, sweet, and tender when the bite must be tempered. Edgar Gomez writes with the magnetic candor that flourishes at gay bars, with as much style as all the queens at DragCon, with observant eyes well trained in steamy bathhousesall of which he sketches in these electric pages. This book parses queer spaces, the queer self, with a heart as intelligent and thoughtful as its author. As he proves in his unapologetic memoir, Gomez is a force to be reckoned with.

Matt Ortile, author of The Groom Will Keep His Name

Edgar Gomez has written a memoir that stands out among so many others, with a narrative voice thats singularly hilarious and observant and unforgettable, so perfectly nuanced with memory and humor in limning the landscapes of love in Florida and Nicaragua. At the center is his mother, a bright vivid burst of fear and tenderness and absolute deep-hearted love. High-Risk Homosexual presents a brand new voice of impeccable clarity and vision.

Susan Straight, American Book Award finalist and author of In The Country of Women

Theres a rhythm to vulnerable, honest writing, and Edgar Gomez doesnt miss a beat in High-Risk Homosexual. His charactershis mother, his friends, his loversare his dance partners whom he lovingly dips and twirls across the page, their beauty on full display even as he bares their humanity and his own to the audience. This memoir is a master class in humor with warmth, not ridicule, and truth with tenderness, not overexposure. Pick this book up for the laughs, but have your tissue ready for a few tears too.

Minda Honey, author of An Anthology of Assholes

High-Risk Homosexual is a vivacious, compelling, and intimate portrait about queer coming-of-age and finding oneself. Gomezs writing has this special way of inviting us in, like an old friend, catching us up to the pains, doldrums, and pleasures of living, reminding us at every turn of the exquisite messiness that is life. This memoir is a sheer delight, and one not to be missed.

Marcos Gonsalez, author of Pedros Theory: Reimagining the Promised Land

Edgar Gomez is the chaotic queer hero we both need and deservewith humor and charm, he tenderly leads us into night clubs, bathhouses, the back seat of cars with anonymous men, asking us to examine our current place in the world amongst the lonely and brokenhearted, the ones who dare live our truest lives. For anyone whose coming out and coming-of-age is messy in all the ways, let High-Risk Homosexual be a road map.

Christopher Gonzalez, author of Im Not Hungry but I Could Eat

High-Risk Homosexual is an absolute marvel in voice, style, and its raucous, tender, heartbreaking, compassionate, and ultimately triumphant examination of gay spaces, the politics of gender, violence against GLBTQ folks, and, of course, the human heart. Edgar Gomez is an unforgettable writer with enviously fantastic storytelling skills. Youll laugh, youll cry, youll rage, youll buy this book for all of your friends.

Emily Rapp Black, author of Sanctuary and Frida Kahlo and My Left Leg

A Memoir

EDGAR GOMEZ

Soft Skull

New York

For my mother, La Terrible, and my brother, Maracas

You and your causes! Look, that child is Latin.

You dont wanna be gettin mixed up in all that Latin mess.

She might turn out to be a Sandinista or something.

NOXEEMA JACKSON

To Wong Foo, Thanks for Everything! Julie Newmar

First, throughout this book, I use the words Latino/a and Latinx. The latter, pronounced latin-ex, is a more inclusive term meant to make room for transgender and gender nonconforming people in the community. Neither of these words are perfect, and the idea of a Latinx community in general is itself overly broad and historically anti-Black and anti-Indigenous. Until theres a better way to describe our complicated identities, I use Latino/a/x with the understanding that I mean anyone who identifies as such, and that includes Black and Indigenous people.

Second, while this is a work of nonfiction, the names and identifying features of some individuals have been changed to protect privacy, and conversations were reconstructed to the best of my ability. Please dont sue me.

Moments after I was born at the Mount Sinai Medical Center of Greater Miami, my parents were handed a document, which I stumbled upon years later, curled and yellow at the edges, inside of a shoebox in a corner of my closet. It told them everything they needed to know about me, like a pamphlet you might find in the packaging of a new blender. My birthday: March 5, 1992. Birth time: 1:44 a.m. Weight: 8 lbs., 5 oz. Theres even an imprint of my newborn feet, so small I could hold them both in the palm of one hand. Of course Im fascinated by them, because theyre mine, but I dont know why anyone else would be interested enough to press my soles to ink and have them preserved forever. Im not entirely sure what medical or governmental purpose my little feet serve. I wasnt asked for a copy of them when I applied for a drivers permit, or a passport, or when I signed up for the drug that would lead me to being diagnosed a high-risk homosexual. This document is not a birth certificate. Its something else, I think. An instruction manual.

Taking up almost half the page, a poetic sketch of what my parents should expect of their newborn is nested under the heading What Is a Boy?

Between the innocence of babyhood and the dignity of manhood we find a delightful creature called a boy. Boys come in assorted sizes, weights and colors, but all boys have the same creed: to enjoy every second of every minute of every hour of every day and to protest with noise (their only weapon) when their last minute is finished and the adult males pack them off to go to bed at night.

Boys are found everywhereon top of, underneath, inside of, climbing on, swinging from, running around, or jumping to. Mothers love them, little girls hate them, older sisters and brothers tolerate them, adults ignore them, and Heaven protects them.

A boy is a magical creatureyou can lock him out of your living room, but you cant lock him out of your heart. You can get him out of your study, but you cant get him out of your mind. Might as well give uphe is your captor, your jailor, your boss, and your mastera freckled-face, pint-sized, cat-chasing, bundle of noise.

Yes, he is a nerve-wracking nuisance, just a noisy bundle of mischief. But when your dreams tumble down and the world is a messwhen it seems you are pretty much a foolhe can make it all perfect when he climbs on your knee and whispers, I love you best of all!