Mike Towle - Biden Time: Crazy Joe in His Own Words

in his own words

COMPILED BY MIKE TOWLE

Copyright 2015 by WND Books

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Paperback ISBN: 978-1-938067-96-9
eBook ISBN: 978-1-938067-97-6

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This book is full of nearly unbelievable words spoken by a veritable politician. In order to prove that we arent making this up, use your smartphone to scan the square codes to see video clips of Joe Biden actually saying some of these outlandish quotes as well as published articles that offer a record of his nonesense in perpetuity. To view all the videos in this book from your computer go to
YOUTUBE.COM/USER/THEWNDTV1

Download the Scan app on your smartphone for free. Then, open the app, point the camera at the code, and youre done! No need to take a photo or press a scan button.

*In order to use Scan, your device must have a built-in camera. When scanning codes that redirect to online content (such as websites), you will need Internet connectivity.

When Joe Biden steps up to a live microphone, its like the green flag going down at the start of one of those local short-track stock car races you never know when the first wreck is coming.

Public officials misspeaking during a public event or on a live television or radio interview is not that uncommon, but Biden has turned verbal goofs and gaffes into a modern art form. It sometimes comes complete with profane outbursts presumably not meant for public consumption; crass and even creepy talk apparently intended for mass distribution; and all sorts of other verbal bloopers, bleeps, and blunders. All this has made this American vice president as exasperating as he is at times endearing; as vexing as he is verbose.

Over the years, Biden has been burdened by charges of plagiarism and a reputation for laziness dating back to his academically challenging days at the University of Delaware and, later, Syracuse University School of Law. Those who know him have described Biden as an engaging guy whos a gab master of the sort of BS that would seemingly play better at frat parties, reunion gatherings, and lawn socials than in the sacred and polished halls of the US Capitol.

Biden Time offers a collection of hundreds of the most memorable and mystifying quotes by and about Biden dating back to when he was a lad growing up first in Scranton, Pennsylvania, and later in Wilmington, Delaware, all the time brandishing that familiar thousand-watt smile opposite that single-watt mental agility at the mic.

Expect to be entertained and humored by reading this book, which focuses on the lighter-weight side of Biden not likely to be prominently featured in his vice presidential library or in any of the high-achievement annals comprising the history of the Democratic Party. Biden served thirty-six years as a US Senator (D-DE) and at this writing appeared headed toward completing two terms and eight years as President Barack Obamas VP sidekick. For that he should be commended and command respect and our gratitude.

That said, lets now get on with, using one of his favorite expressions, all the malarkey that has over the years tumbled out of his mouth.

MIKE TOWLE

Joe Biden is a big sports guy, a former high school and college jock, so he can appreciate this kicking off this book with a top 25 list of his best lines, most memorable for the wrong reasons and in no particular order. There are plenty of top ten or top seven (or whatever) lists of classic Biden quotes floating around the Internet, but those lists dont do justice to his body of work when it comes to foot in mouth. The hard part was stopping at twenty-five for the sake of this opening salvo of solecism.

I mean, you got the first mainstream African-American who is articulate and bright and clean and a nice-looking guy. I mean, thats a storybook, man.

The only story to be booked here were the headlines Biden generated with this forehead-slapping, politically incorrect assessment of Barack Obama near the beginning of the 2008 presidential primary campaign season (New York Observer, 2007). At the time, Biden and Obama were Democratic primary opponents. After this went viral, who would have thought that Obama about eighteen months later would pick Biden as his 2008 running mate?

VIDEO

You cannot go to a 7-11 or a Dunkin Donuts unless you have a slight Indian accent. Im not joking.

Not joking? Well, as tennis great John McEnroe was so fond of saying, you cannot be serious! Biden said this during the 2006 C-SPAN series Road to the White House (National Journal/C-SPAN, July 6, 2006) while speaking with an Indian-American man and boasting about his support among Indian-Americans. To Bidens credit, at least hes always been willing to speak off the cuff and without use of a teleprompter, unlike his presidential boss Barack Obama.

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When the stock market crashed, Franklin D. Roosevelt got on the television and didnt just talk about the, you know, the princes of greed. He said, Look, heres what happened.

Okay, so perhaps Biden skipped school on the day they taught US history. Biden apparently didnt know that it was Herbert Hoover who was president when the stock market crashed in 1929; FDR took office in 1933. Only experimental TV sets were around at that time (CBS Evening News, Katie Couric interview, September 22, 2008).

VIDEO

When seagull droppings landed on my head at a campaign event at Bowers Beach two days before Election Day, I chose to read it as a sign of a coming success.

Now thats looking at life through rose-colored glasses, although wouldnt it be easier, and cleaner, to read tea leaves if its your future you want to know? (Biden, Promises to Keep, 73)

His mom lived in Long Island for ten years or so. God rest her soul. And, although, shes wait, your moms still, your moms still alive? Your dad passed. God bless her soul.

Biden speaking, during a March 2010 White House ceremony, about the mother of Irish Prime Minister Brian Cowen, who, it turns out, was very much alive (About.com).

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