Pascale Lemire - Dog Shaming

Copyright 2013 by Pascale Lemire

All rights reserved.
Published in the United States by Three Rivers Press,
an imprint of the Crown Publishing Group,
a division of Random House LLC, New York,
a Penguin Random House Company.
www.crownpublishing.com

Three Rivers Press and the Tugboat design
are registered trademarks of Random House LLC.

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data Lemire, Pascale.
Dog shaming / Pascale Lemire.
pages cm
1. DogsPictorial works. 2. DogsHumor. 3. Photography of dogs. I. Title.
SF430.L45 2013 636.7dc23 2013023473

eISBN: 978-0-385-34935-2

Cover design by Nupoor Gordon
Cover photograph: Jordan Curtis-Sherrod (Sugars mom)

v3.1

I would like to dedicate this book to my
wonderful husband, Mike. None of this would
have been possible without his support, love,
and computer knowledge! Id also like to
dedicate this book to our two rescue wiener
dogs, Beau and Dasha, because without them,
thered be no Dog Shaming.

Dog Shaming. A term almost unheard of a year ago. Today it has become a household name among dog lovers everywhere. It all started in August 2012, when my dog ate my fianc Mikes underwear. We were sitting in bed one night, reading from our respective tablets, when we heard one of our two dogs chewing something. Whos under the bed? What are they chewing?!?! Mike yelled. He reached down and pulled Beau, our male wiener dog, out from under the bed frame. What are you eating, buddy? he asked. By the time Mike saw what Beau was chewinga pair of Mikes boxer-briefsthey had been destroyed. All that was left was the elastic band and shredded pieces of cotton fabric. We sat in bed staring at each other, incredulous. Then almost simultaneously, we burst out laughing. How was it that this fifteen-pound dog could have ingested so much fabric? Our laughter turned to concern when we realized that Beau would eventually have to pass all that fabric! (And guess who would be cleaning it up?)

In a stroke of genius, Mike wrote up a sign that read I am an underwear-eating jerk! and put it next to Beau and the chewed-up underwear. I had always blogged about how destructive and troublesome our little Beau was, but Id never had photographic evidencenow we had proof. Beau hung his head in shame as if he knew why he was being scolded. Mike snapped a photo, which I then posted to my blog. With that, Dog Shaming was born.

Within twenty-four hours, my blog post had received almost a thousand comments. (I was worried Mike would be upset that his underwear had been viewed in a public forum by a thousand people, but he remained unfazed.) The funny thing is, other dog owners wanted in on it, and people started sending in their own dogs shames, which I dutifully posted. I could barely keep up! Soon the mediaCNN, People magazine, and MSNBCcame calling. All I could do was squeal and shout, Mike! Mike! Your underwear is on TV again! The blog had become a bona fide phenomenon. I was deluged with submissions, and taking care of the blog quickly became a full-time job.

Barfing, chasing, chewing, biting, farting, stealing, jumping, running away, human-humpingI was astonished by the range of dog indiscretions. How can creatures so cute be capable of such outrageous behavior and downright grossness? Consider the category of eating-what-they-shouldnt. People have sent in photos of their dogs who had eaten:

socks

underwear

a pound of butter

a cup of sugar (including the plastic container the sugar was in)

walls and baseboards

laptops, cell phones, and tablets

freshly cut Valentines Day flowers

chocolate (too many times to count)

garbage (too many times to count)

soap

dog training books

an octopus (!)

What youll find in this book are never-before-seen photos from the vault here at Dog Shaming headquarterswith a handful of classics. You might even recognize your own dog in some of these shots in a My dog does that! And that! And definitely that! kind of way. Although the main goal of Dog Shaming is to poke fun at our most favorite furry creatures, it also shows pet owners that theyre not the only ones to have a mischievous animal. Every dog is just one hand-lettered sign away from the perfect Dog Shaming picture, after all! We all know our dogs misbehave; there are no perfect dogs. Anyone who tells you, Oh youll never see my dog on that website; shes perfect, is either lying to you or is still blaming the dryer for all his missing socks.

I have often wondered how Dog Shaming got so big, so quickly. Internet memes are such a mystery to me. Theyre nonexistent one day and everywhere the next. I think when it came to Dog Shaming, it was as if people were just waiting for an outlet to vent their frustrations about their dogs inexplicable behavior in a fun way. Submitting a photo and getting like-minded dog lovers (millions of them!) to laugh with you is cathartic. Sure, were shaming our dogs, but its with the most possible affection, as were replacing the screen door they broke, taking them for X-rays because they ate an engagement ring, or apologizing to the clerk at the pet store for the puddle of vomit near the treat bar. We give them unconditional love, and they give it right back. The shaming is done with love.

Of course, it doesnt hurt that dogs cant read.

Woof.

Pascale Lemire,

CEO of Dog Shaming