Zak Bagans - I Am Haunted: Living Life Through the Dead

First Published in 2015 by Victory Belt Publishing.

Copyright Zak Bagans and Kelly Crigger

All rights reserved.

No part of this publication may be reproduced or distributed in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, or stored in a database or retrieval system, without prior written permission from the publisher.

ISBN-13: 978-1-628600-61-2

This book is for entertainment purposes only. The publisher and authors of this book are not responsible in any manner whatsoever for any adverse effects arising directly or indirectly as a result of the information provided in this book. If not practiced safely and with caution, paranormal investigations can be hazardous to your health.

Interior and cover design by Yordan Terziev and Boryana Yordanova

Cover photo by Charles Henry

RRD 0115

I dedicate this book to all my amazing fans, my Ghost Adventures Crew (GAC) family, all my skeptics turned believers, and all the souls who have communicated with me and left a mark on my life forever.

THANK YOU:

My entire family for dealing with me and understanding the unique job and gift I have and that Im not always myself when I return home from intense investigations

My dog, Gracie, and the Nevada SPCA

The spirits who have made contact with me and didnt harm me

My co-author, Kelly Crigger, for listening to my crazy stories and life every day

My publisher, Erich Krauss, and editor, Pam Mourouzis

My assistant, Cecilia Medina

Aaron Goodwin, Billy Tolley, Jay and Ashley Wasley, Bill Chappell, Dave Schrader, Devin Lawrence, Matthew Mourgides, Father Sebastiaan, Mark and Debby Constantino, Chris Fleming, Mike Haberman, Tara Bohren, Scott Doctor Gruenwald, Steve Barton, and Zory

And Harold the Haunted Doll for bruising my f-ing arm...Ill never pick you up again.

They say that our life, our existence, contains more unknown than known. That must mean that in death we find out what the rest of the unknown is. Ive traveled the world searching the darkest nooks and crannies of places only talked about in whispersplaces most people fear to go. Ive been through the ringer of emotions, from boundless joy to profound sorrow and paralyzing fear. Ive stood on the edge of the abyss and faced death with an uncommon clarity. Ive prodded and provoked things we dont understand in an effort to learn their secrets, in some cases hoping deep down inside that I wouldnt.

Ive called out axe murderers, crawled through catacombs, been attacked by demons, been possessed by evil, and embarked on a quest to find the real Dracula. My adventures are a constant struggle between fear and courage. My body and soul bear the scars, but I consider myself fortunate. I made a conscious decision to do these things, and since 2004 my life has been a tumultuous journey through the best of times and the worst of times that I wouldnt trade for anything. People watch my TV shows and think they know me, but there are layers of my life that have never been made public.

Until now.

When youre young, life is just fun, but as you mature you learn to appreciate all the amazing things life has to offer. After all these years on the road, my experiences with the living and the dead have deepened my thinking and my overall sense of life. Life is beautiful. Life is horrific. Everything has its balance in the universe, and as I grow older, this balance is becoming clearer. I want to share it with you.

Some of the greatest books ever written are about the mysteries and discoveries of life on the road. Jack Kerouac, Paddy Fermor, and Hunter S. Thompson, to name a few, have given us the gift of venturing out into the world and looking at it in new and unexpected ways. The road is a lonely, exhausting, invigorating, and living thing, but the wonder of seeing things we never would have dreamed of makes it worth the price we pay to leave the safety of home.

If theres one thing I know, its that I dont know enough. The question I most want to answerwhat happens to us after deathis probably best left unanswered, when I think about it. Its the one mystery the universe will hold onto until weve all moved through it, and rightly so. Who are we to cheat death? The best we can hope for is to understand and manage it, and even that is pushing the boundaries of playing God. That doesnt mean Ill stop asking the question or searching for answers. I wont stop demanding to know more than we really should. I am human, after all. We humans are explorers and pioneers, and we find our inner strength when the end state is the absolute unknown.

In early 2014, Kelly Crigger and I decided to write a new book. We set up a system where I talked into my phone and sent him the files for transcription, and before long I found myself talking and talking and talking. I had more stuff to get off my chest than I realized; once the dam broke, I flooded the pages with stories of my life and adventures. But this is more than just a one-way conversation. I also learned a few things about myself. Ive always known that I am haunted by the dead, but I didnt realize that I am also haunted by the living. As youre about to read, I have a distaste for modern society that tugs at my soul just as much as the spirits tug on me. We all grow up eventually, but being thrust into a white-hot spotlight of popularity turbocharged my maturation process. I have seen the best and worst in people both living and dead, and I want to share some of those experiences with you.

BUCKLE UP.

Spirits and rituals have changed me.

Over the course of filming Ghost Adventures, I havent matured just as a paranormal investigator and a TV personality, but as a person as well. My experiences have made me see the world differently than I did before this whirlwind of attention started. Before GA, I was what I would consider a normal guynormal in the respect that I thought only about this material world. When I go out in public now, it seems that all I see is Madonna song materialpeople living in a material world. They do what society tells them to do. They have regular jobs and party on the weekends. They go to the movies at night. They spend money to get good-looking. Thats the ebb and flow of present-day society. Those are the normal things people do. Im not saying theyre bad things, but as youve probably realized by now (or you will by the end of this book), Im not normal.

I feel like Im detaching from the material world. I dont know whats going on with me some days, but ever since I started filming Ghost Adventures, participating in rituals, communicating with the dead, and getting more serious about my work, my experiences have been more life-altering. Your typical paranormal investigator will go out and capture EVPs (electronic voice phenomena), do audio recordings and EMF (electromagnetic frequency) readings, take a few pictures, have a couple of experiences, see some shadows, and then go home, and theyre back to their normal lives. Thats not who I am. Thats not what Im all about. Every other week Im at a new location getting deeper and deeper in touch with the spirit world.

When I look back at Nick Groff, Aaron Goodwin, and myself in the early days of the show, I see three guys who would do a lockdown but didnt have any idea what we were doing. We knew what we were supposed to do and what we felt we had to do in terms of our investigations, but we didnt know that much. Now were in a deeper place, and at times I feel lost in the regular world, even though I have a lot of the things I always wanted, which I earned through hard work. Ive been able to buy a nice house and cars and support myself without having to worry about paying bills. I earned that. For seven years Ive delivered a number-one-rated TV show to a major network, along with many other successful projects. Thats the American dream we all strive for: success and security.