Jan Goldstein - Sacred Wounds: Succeeding Because of Lifes Pain

There is no coming to consciousness without pain.

Carl Jung

T hey say there are only two things in life of which we can be certaindeath and taxes. They are wrong.

There is a third. Its truth is intensely personal and at the same time universal: along the road of life we willeach and every one of usencounter pain. If we are fortunate it will come and go softly, as in the passing of a loved one who has lived a long and productive life. For many of us, however, pain comes in the form of a difficult childhood, severed relationships, rejection in matters of the heart, physical challenges, personal failure, dismissal in the workplace, serious illness, or the traumatic death of those closest to us.

Pain, hardship, and struggle have been part of the human condition since our lovely orb of earth big-banged into existence. Whether the Garden of Eden is factual or poetic is not the issue here. In the cultural and religious consciousness of the Western world, we were booted out of Paradise and became hardwired to a tempest-tossed universe.

In Genesis, as a consequence of her disobeying a single admonition, the Almighty punishes Eve and, through her, all women, promising to greatly multiply your pain. In case we miss the point, it is reiterated: In anguish shall you bring forth children. This little exchange, with its severe retribution for a seemingly minor infraction, has always struck me as less God the Father than simply the Godfather.

Now, men, weve got our own share of dire retribution: Cursed is the ground because of you is Gods offering to Adam and the testosterone-equipped generations to come; in toil shall you eat of it thorns and thistles it shall bring forth to you.

Each time Ive pondered this passage, the same disturbing question emerges: exactly why are we condemned with such harshness for eating from the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil? After all, isnt the quest for knowledge part of being human?

Maybe the dramatic and divine act of expulsion was simply an excuse. I have a strong suspicion that the idea beneath the story is that we werent meant to live in Paradise after all. We were meant for the real world, with all of its struggles.

The promise of pain at the very onset of human consciousness is not the sole province of the Western mind. It is a thread that can be detected in ancient cultures and religious traditions from around the world.

The Mayan creation story, the Popol Vuh, or Council Book, speaks of the Blood Gatherer, one of several sublords of Death whose purpose, from the moment of creation, is to afflict ordinary folks.

The Fulani of Mali in Africa have a creation myth in which Doondari finds that humankind is too proud and as a penalty inflicts its members with blindness and worry.

In Vedic Hinduism, humanity is seen as susceptible to forces that affect our health, wealth, and loved ones. It is understood that joy and suffering commingle. Early Hindus tried to appease the various gods and stave off suffering with rituals and offerings that eventually came to be understood as symbolic worship.

In the Mahaparanibbana sutra, Buddha is found in excruciating pain. In fact, while he is still the Hindu prince Siddhartha, his own anguish had inspired him to struggle with the riddle of life: Why is there so much suffering? His enlightenment brought about his metamorphosis into the Buddha, and still he experiences pain. The Four Noble Truths of Buddhism begin with the profound acknowledgment: All life is suffering.

Not until we are lost do we begin to understand ourselves.

Henry David Thoreau

Human suffering is so inherent and so mystifying that virtually all cultures and religions seek to explain, understand, even absorb into the religion itself this very basic and unchanging human condition: we will suffer. Even the foundations of modern psychology are built on the recognition that pain is a by-product of our existence in, and interaction with, the world. Each and every one of us, whether we take our cue from religion, cultural myth, or the local tarot reader, encounters difficult times and the anguish that accompanies them at some point in our lives. (Most of us, more than once.) It goes with the territory of living in our human skin, with hearts that can break, bodies that can fail, minds that can despair.

And yet, there is a silver lining, a gift if you will.

Its there wrapped inside the darkness, waiting only for us to claim it and to build our lives with the beauty of its light. Before we can do so, we have to alter the lenses through which we see, feel, and act. We must come to the realization that life is not so much about attaining happiness as it is about finding meaning. And it is meaning that emerges from our inevitable wounds, and meaning that we can use to rebuild ourselves into beings capable of more. We hold the key to turning loss into meaning, meaning into power, and power into success.

S peaking of loss, lets take just a moment to consider what is, for my money, the most famous bad luck tale of all time, the biblical epitome of faithfulness: Gods servant Job.

Job has everything: children in abundance, livestock aplenty, a loving spouse, a diverse portfolio, and loyalty and belief in his Creator by the bucketful. In fact, hes what you might call the poster boy for faith. One fine day, God has justly taken notice of Job, and while in the company of Satan (from the Hebrew word sathane, defined as the opponent), God says:

Have you considered My servant Job, that there is none like him on the earth, a blameless and upright man, one who fears God and shuns evil?

But Satan scoffs at Jobs blamelessness, and suggests to God a nagging qualifier: its awfully easy to have a lot of faith when all your ducks are in a row. Why not try judging the mans faithfulness when hes not leading quite so charmed a life? God agrees that Satan has a point, and gives him permission to test Jobs faith:

One day when Jobs sons and daughters were feasting and drinking wine at the oldest brothers house, a messenger came to Job and said, The oxen were plowing and the donkeys were grazing nearby, and the Sabeans attacked and carried them off. They put the servants to the sword, and I am the only one who has escaped to tell you!

While he was still speaking, another messenger came and said, The fire of God fell from the sky and burned up the sheep and the servants, and I am the only one who has escaped to tell you!

While he was still speaking, another messenger came and said, The Chaldeans formed three raiding parties and swept down on your camels and carried them off. They put the servants to the sword, and I am the only one who has escaped to tell you!