Mandisa - Out of the Dark: My Journey Through the Shadows to Find Gods Joy

5700 West Oaks Blvd

Rocklin, CA 95765

Copyright 2022 Mandisa Hundley

All rights reserved. Except as permitted by the US Copyright Act of 1976, no part of this book may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted without prior written permission from the publisher. For information, please contact .

Unless otherwise noted, Scripture quotations are taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version, NIV. Copyright 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc. Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved worldwide. www.zondervan.com. The NIV and New International Version are trademarks registered in the United States Patent and Trademark Office by Biblica, Inc. Scripture quotations marked NLT are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation. Copyright 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Ministries, Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved. Scripture quotations marked NASB are taken from the New American Standard Bible (NASB). Copyright 1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1975, 1977, 1995 by The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission. www.Lockman.org

Permissions have been secured for all songs included. See rear matter for full list.

Printed in the United States of America.

First edition: 2022

10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1

ISBN: 978-1-954201-00-2 (Hardcover)

ISBN: 978-1-954201-01-9 (E-book)

ISBN: 978-1-954201-06-4 (Audiobook)

Publishers Cataloging-in-Publication data

Names: Mandisa, 1976-, author. | Gosselin, Suzanne Hadley, author. | Grant, Natalie, D., foreword author.

Title: Out of the dark : my journey through the shadows to find Gods joy / Mandisa ; with Suzanne Gosselin ; foreword by Natalie Grant.

Description: Nashville, TN: K-LOVE Books, 2021.

Identifiers: ISBN: 978-1-954201-00-2 (hardcover) | 978-1-954201-01-9 (ebook) | 978-1-954201-06-4 (audio)
Subjects: LCSH Mandisa, 1976-. | Contemporary Christian musiciansUnited StatesBiography. | WomenBiography. | Christian life. | BISAC RELIGION / Christian Living / Personal Memoirs | BIOGRAPHY & AUTOBIOGRAPHY / Music | BIOGRAPHY & AUTOBIOGRAPHY / Entertainment & Performing Arts Classification: LCC ML420.M2185 2021 | DDC 277.3/0825/092dc23

Cover design by two line || Studio.

Interior design and typesetting by PerfecType, Nashville, TN.

To Kisha

CONTENTS

by Natalie Grant

FOREWORD

M y friendship with Mandisa goes back more than a decade now. From the moment we met, we shared an instant connection over our love for the same kind of musicsoulful, big-voiced singers who inspired us as vocalists. It didnt take long to realize that we had a lot more in common than just our musical tastes. We are also women with strong personalities, who have no problem speaking our minds! And through the years, weve also discovered weve faced similar battles. Our struggles may stem from different circumstances, but we have wrestled with the same things: fear, anxiety, and depression.

My sweet friend and I have both come to realize that we are not alone. So many are battling similar dark emotions that rage in their hearts and minds. Mandisas Out of the Dark is an honest account that will illuminate the truth: that your mind and your heart are precious to Jesus. It will equip you with the knowledge that God is bigger than any circumstance you face.

As you will soon experience, Mandisas faith is infectious. And when she shares with you what is on her heart, you want to do all you can to be a part of her story. Her transparency is a constant invitation to draw near to Jesus. When she told me about her desperate desire to see her brother, John, come to know Jesus, I decided to join my faith with hers. Every day at nine a.m., an alarm would go off on my phone, and the words Pray for John would pop up on my screen. And thats exactly what I did each and every day. I prayed for John. Youll have to read this book to find out how God answered that prayer, but lets just say He did not disappoint.

Again and again, Ive witnessed Mandisas willingness to play a part in someone elses healing, either physical or spiritual, regardless of the cost. In fact, I have never met anyone who champions others like she does. She is a cheerleader in the most genuine ways. In her moments of great success, she often turns the attention away from her talent to shine the spotlight on those around her.

Her faithfulness in sharing her battle with depression is another example of her selfless love for others. Her openness and vulnerability in telling her story demonstrate her huge heart and confidence in the healing power of our God. Out of the Dark invites you into that story and shows the way to that healing. This book is not a quick fix; in fact, one of my favorite aspects of this story is that Mandisa is still on her journey. She doesnt have it all figured out. She openly invites us to peek into her life and is candid about how, as a follower of Jesus, you can believe the truth one day and wake up the next having fallen for another lie. By revealing her own struggles, she helps us see that God is the One who does the work and leads us to true and lasting freedom. We dont need a quick fix; we just need Jesus. Every moment. Every day. And in each chapter, Mandisa leads us back to this truth.

I know Out of the Dark will be a lifeline to those who, like us, have struggled with their mental health. She is not afraid to share the hard times she has walked through, and I am so very proud of my friends courage and vulnerability. Wherever you find yourself on your life journey, in this book you will find wisdom and practical advice to help you find contentment with who God made you to be and the courage to take Him at His word.

I understand how lonely the dark is. My testimony, and the testimony Mandisa shares in this book, is that only the Lord can bring you out of that darkness. As Mandisa shares her low points from her journey in the dark, it becomes evident that she trusts the Lord to be her light. We want Him to be your light too. And I believe Mandisa, through her bravery and transparency, will serve as a guide, showing many the way out of the dark.

Natalie Grant

one

OVERCOMER

Youre an overcomer

Stay in the fight til the final round

Youre not going under

Cause God is holding you right now

You might be down for a moment

Feeling like its hopeless

Thats when He reminds you

That youre an overcomer

I cracked the door to the bedroom open and entered the dimly lit room. A day earlier, my friends husband, Breonus, had texted me: Weve called in hospice. Youd better come see Kisha as soon as you can. My beautiful friend, hairstylist, and former background singer had been in the fight of her life against breast cancer for a year and a half. Now with the palliative nurse on hand to make Kisha more comfortable, it seemed she wasnt going to win the fight. I couldnt bring myself to believe it.

I had learned of her illness on a chilly January afternoon. Our scheduled hair appointment began as it had for over a decade. I sat in the salon chair with a towel and protective cape around my neck as Kisha worked her magic on my new growth. The smell of chemical relaxer filled the air, and the sound of Wayne Brady giving away a vacation on Lets Make a Deal was drowned out by our conversation. Now that Kisha no longer traveled with me, we relished these hours when we could hash out the latest details of our days. I would catch her up on road life, the latest album I was recording, and any male suitors I had my eye on. She would talk about church, gush about Breonus or their son, BJ, and fill me in on her recent gigs.