Piers Anthony - Xanth 14: Question Quest

So you see, Rose concluded, I can't marry you if you aren't a true Magician. But if you go to the University of Magic, you can get a degree in magic, and then you will be a real Magician and Castle Roogna will have to let me go. She glanced obliquely at me. Unless you are willing to be king again. Then you could live here.

I don't want to be king again! I protested. But if that was the price of marrying her, then I might have to do it. She was certainly my dream woman. It had taken time to love MareAnn-perhaps all of a day-and then it hadn't worked out. Rose had become my second love in all of a minute, and there was every sign it would work out if I cooperated. Anyway, the Storm King is young yet, so Xanth won't have an opening for another king for perhaps forty years. Do you want to wait that long?

No! she exclaimed with maidenly emphasis, her precious bosom heaving. I want to marry you right now.

It was one of the oddities of our encounter that there had been no courtship or proposal; we had met and were in love, and we wanted to marry and remain with each other indefinitely. Neither of us questioned that. She had told me her story, and she already knew mine. So our only present concern was how to manage our association, when Castle Roogna would let her marry only a proper Magician and would not let her leave before she did. The castle had not anticipated the approach of a non-Magician who knew enough of magic to get through. It had tried to balk me and had failed, perhaps in part because it attuned to the kingly experience I had had and could not be quite certain that I wasn't a Magician, But it would not let Rose go. She was Rose of Roogna now, and the castle was in effect her parent. I really could not question that; it had taken good care of her for (almost) two and a half centuries. Had it not done so, I would not have met her, and that would have been disaster.

Where is this University of Magic? I asked. I have learned of most magical things of Xanth, but not that.

That's because it isn't of the human realm in Xanth, she said. I read about it in an Arcane Text. It is a demonic institution. Most demons live under the ground somewhere; only a few bother to explore the surface, and then they aren't very serious about it.

I know, I murmured, thinking of Dana. She had been caught with a conscience, so had had to endure the indignity of human fallibilities of conscience and love. She had been a wonderful wife in every respect, until she succeeded in getting rid of her conscience. Our son, Dafrey, was a good person too; I hoped he didn't lose the conscience when he married and sired offspring. Normal demons just didn't care very much about human beings.

Yes, you do, she agreed, touching my hand. She had reviewed my relationship with Dana and did not hold it against me. Rose was my second true love, and would be my first married true love, because of MareAnn's determined innocence. So you must go among the demons, and enroll in their university, and pass their courses and get your degree, and be a Magician, and then we can marry and be happy together.

But I don't have a way to contact the demons, I protested. And if I did, I can't think what would persuade them to let me enroll in their school.

There is a spell for summoning demons in one of the tomes in the castle library, she said.

I realized that that library was something I had to see. I could probably spend years there, learning the things I had not been able to learn elsewhere. If I got to be a true Magician and married Rose, the castle would let me do that, even if it didn't let me stay overnight. Maybe I could make some sort of deal, I said. I suspected that I would not enjoy whatever the demons demanded, but I was quite sure I would not enjoy life apart from Rose, so this was the lesser of discomforts.

I shall go in and find that volume and learn that spell, Rose said. Meanwhile, perhaps Souffl?ill let you bathe in the moat.

The monster serpent hissed angrily at the notion, not wanting its nice moat dirtied by my grime. But Rose turned her head and looked at it with just a tiny hint of reproach, and the creature melted out of sight. I knew how that was.

So she walked gracefully inside, and I set my pack down on the bank and waded into the water. Soon I was clean and the moat was filthy. Souffl?etreated around to the back of the castle, but I could hear the monster sneezing.

Then I emerged and walked toward a linen tree to harvest a towel. At that moment Rose emerged and caught a full view of me. Oops!

But she smiled. I have seen your healthy body in every state, she murmured. The Tapestry conceals nothing.

That was true. I had known about the Tapestry only through history and hoped to get to see and use it when I became a Magician. Of course I had no physical secrets from Rose!

By the time I had gotten dried and dressed, Rose had set up the spell. It was an odd one, requiring a pentacle (a five-pointed star), a candle, and spoken words. The words combine with the flame to summon the demon, Rose explained. The diagram is to prevent the demon from reaching out to squish you, being angry about being summoned. It can't leave the pentacle until you let it go, and you won't let it go until it makes a binding deal with you.

This is an interesting device, I remarked. I had thought I knew something about demons, but I had not known they could be summoned, and Dana had not told me. Even during her souled state, she had evidently had some caution. What are the words of the spell?

There seem to be a number of variations, she said. Some use terms which I, as a maiden, naturally do not understand. I suppose demons, being creatures of the nether regions, have a more explicit mode of expression. As nearly as I could tell, you can say what you want and it should work, as long as it rhymes. The more specific words are to isolate particular demons.

That gave me a notion. Maybe Dana, the one to whom I was married, would be good to call. She would not pretend to misunderstand me.

Perhaps so, Rose said, seeming not entirely pleased. That made me wonder just how explicit the Tapestry was about matters relating to the Adult Conspiracy. Since it evidently knew whether its watcher was of royal blood, it might also know whether the watcher was old enough. Was Rose considered to be twenty or two hundred and sixty-six? What did it consider to be the fabled Age of Consent? I could not safely assume that she remained innocent, despite her reference to maidenly modesty. She could be jealous of Dana, for good reason. Yet I did not know any other demon by name.

We lit the candle and set it in the middle of the pentacle. Then I stepped out and said: Dana Demon, passing by-come to me and don't be shy. The idea of a demon being shy was laughable, but the point was the rhyme.

The flame flickered. Then smoke curled out of it, looming larger until it almost filled the pentacle. Blazing eyes formed in the smoke and squirmy tentacles. What monster had we caught?

I had understood your former wife to be beautiful, Rose murmured, with what in a less gentle person might have been taken as irony.

The smoke dissipated, leaving a firmer outline. The tentacles became arms and legs. The body shaped down into a roughly female figure with a head in the form of a swirling storm cloud. What idiot put this firetrap here? a voice reminiscent of a harpy's screeched.