Beth Reason - A Journey Deep

A

Journey

Deep

By Beth Reason

Copyright 2013 Beth Reason

SmashwordsEdition

Smashwords Edition, LicenseNotes

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Table Of Contents:

Chapter1

Chapter2

Chapter3

Chapter4

Chapter5

Chapter6

Chapter7

Chapter8

Chapter9

Chapter10

Chapter11

Chapter12

Chapter13

Chapter14

Chapter15

Chapter16

Chapter17

Chapter18

Chapter19

Chapter20

About theauthor

Chapter1

My life had changed and I was tryingto decide how I felt about it.

I'd packed already. I'dgotten the handful of possessions that had crammed my sleepingquarters for the past fifteen years shoved into my dad's oldbackpack. He said he "dusted it off" for me. I guess that's justanother one of those sayings everyone assumed I understood. Ididn't. What's dust? I could tell you what my HuTA would say.Probably something like, "Dust is a settled layer of formerlyairborne particles, comprised of dirt, pollen, skin flakes..." Iunderstood the concept, I'd just never lived with it. And I didn'tunderstand why you'd actually wantall those contaminants to fly back up in the air.If they settle, isn't that the point? I'd much rather walk on bugwings and pieces of skin and hair particles than breathe themin.

Mother's had been going on and onabout a million things like that. Sunscreen. Mosquitoes. Humidity."Wiping your feet, young man," whatever that meant. She'd still begoing on, in fact, if I was still with her. I was in the jump seatall geared out and even with her half a ship away, I swear I couldhear her. She's just got that kind of voice thatcarries.

"Don't let her get to you. You'llsettle in just fine."

"I don't want to settle in,Dad."

I suppose I did make up my mind afterall. Maybe it was when I was packing up. Maybe it was when I wasfiling my day's work with HuTA for the last time. Maybe that's whenit hit me. Maybe it was Mother's nattering that made up my mindabout it. Or maybe I hated this all along, whenever Dad would startto talk about Earth and "home". Maybe I've always hated the idea ofgoing there.

"Going back," is how Dad putit.

Back? Home? No way. Itmight be his home.It's not mine, and it never has been.

"Do you just want me gone?"

Not only did Dad and Mother jump allover that one, the whole crew did, the geeks and squeaks included.It makes me feel a little better about my time with them all, eventhough I know that some of them were only saying it to save face infront of the others. Jenna would miss me. Stephan, he should, too,since I'd spent a year and a half doing all his work when Motherwasn't looking. Daniel, of course, since I'm the only one who'sever liked his cooking. Dad said it's only because I didn't knowany better. Maybe that's true, but so what? Who was going to tellDaniel he was doing a good job and mean it once I left? I hopesomeone did.

Xavier was glad I was going. He hatedme my whole life. I used to let it bother me, but for the last fewyears I just accepted it, especially when I got old enough torealize he's really just a jerk. It's not personal. I really thinkhe just doesn't like anyone.

"He's got a difficult job, Jakey. He'sgot to plot and plan every move this ship makes. It's a bigresponsibility, and a little kid poking around in his businessmakes it ten times harder."

Mother always calls me Jakey. I gaveup trying to correct her. It's simply not worth it. Besides, asAshnahta pointed out last year, it's the only time she does notsound like a scientist.

Ashnahta. I never even got to saygood-bye to her.

Yes, my mind was most definitely madeup. I hated going. I hate everything about it. If they cared abouttheir "home" so much, then shouldn't they have been the ones tojump home? Leave me here, in my home, I wanted to scream. I wasalmost a man. I've had more training than any of them in everyaspect of this space ship. Unlike them, I'd lived and breathed itsince birth. They always told me it's unnatural, that it's anunnatural life to live. That's crap! It's my nature. It was then,and it still is now. The wires are my trees. The plasma projectionsare my scenic views. I used to wake up in my apartment and walk themile and a half loop around my metal ship road, passing by myneighbors and listening to the chirps of the machinery and feel thewarmth of the lamps on my face. How is that different from Earth,really?

"The air you breathe isfake."

No. It's just pure.

"And the water you wash with has beengenerated by machine, not clouds."

It's the same cycle, just on a smallerscale.

"You've never wiggled your toes in thesand."

Of course not! The thought was utterlydisgusting to me.

"Or caught a fish for yourdinner."

Like...an animal?

"Or just sat under the night sky andlooked up at the stars."

It always came down to that with Dad.The same argument over and over. And always, I would say to him,"Aha! I have you on that. I'm surrounded by stars!"

He always got sad. "It's just not thesame, Jake."

He wanted me to find out. Motherwanted me to find out. Everyone on deck wanted me to find out,except Stephan. And not one of them could tell me why. Or, moreimportantly, why then? Why were they all suddenly hellbent onshoving me out the door all of a sudden?

Ashnahta would be dead when I gotback. That thought rolled through my head over and over like a waveof air sickness. She would be dead and gone, just a memory, when Igot back. If I got back.

If.

The life cycle of the Qitan is short.She was only about seven, by our human years, but already a fulladult. Dad likes to talk about the amazement of the species thatcan only live about twenty years in our times and yet become soadvanced. "I'll live to a hundred, and I won't know half as much bythe time I die."

"It is because we have learned what isimportant, and what is stupid," Ashnahta told me when I asked aboutit. "You waste time. We have none to waste."

I don't waste time. Everything I dohas a purpose, and I got highly offended when she claimedotherwise. She just laughed and laughed. "Of course you do not,"she said when she was done laughing at me. "You are a space man,not an Earth man. We have them, too."

The Qitan had been space-faring longerthan any other "tribe". Species is the term we use, but Ashnahtaand her people got very angry when they learned the definition. Iremember her mothers and how they raged at my mother about teachingher young "such vile ideas". It was a horrible day for the adults.I was only twelve at the time and was just fascinated that anyonecould yell at Mother and get away with it. Not even Xavier doesthat.

It wasn't until we were back on boardthat night that Mother sat me down and explained why they were mad,and why it's important I agree with them. "They have two legs, twoarms, one head. They look different on the outside, but they havebrains and stomachs and kidneys. They are right, and I was wrong. Ialmost cost this program all we've worked for. You remember thatwhen you are around any of them. You adopt that philosophy andyou'll become more valuable to this mission than anyone else onboard. We look different, but we are the same."

"Even the Ehkins?"

I love Mother, but sometimes her wayof looking at things is not even on the same planet as mine. Shenever liked the Ehkin tribes, not at all. The whole year we orbitedand contacted, she was restless, annoyed. She constantly toldXavier he should pack and move on, go find "intelligent" life. Theywere intelligent, the Ehkin. Just not in the ways that interestedMother. They had no space travel, because they did not care to minethe ores in their planet. They had no weapons, because they saw noreason to kill anything. Mother called the whole planet a"technological waste". She would insist up and down that ourdiscovery of them was "scientifically intriguing", then beg Xavierto move on in the same breath. HuTA told me the word I was lookingfor to describe that mindset was "prejudice", but when I got thedirect meaning of that, I disagreed with HuTA and it ended upgiving me extra homework. Not prejudice. That seems too...mean.Mother wasn't being mean about it. She was...bored? Hoping formore? I don't know. She didn't wish them harm. In their presence,she always treated them with respect. And she allowed me to playwith the one they called "Little Blob". That's the best translationHuTA and I came up with. It was a good name. He really wasn't muchmore than a little blob.