Robert Silverberg - Double Dare

By the time the spaceship had finished jiggling and actually stood firmly on Domerangi soil, Justin Marner was beginning to doubt his sanity.

We must be crazy, he said. We must be.

The other Earthman, who had been gazing out the viewplate at the green-and-gold alien vista, glanced around suddenly at Marners remark. Huh?

There are limits to which one goes in proving a point, Marner said. He indicated the scene outside. This little journey exceeds the limits. Now that were here, Kemridge, Im sure of it. Nobody does things like this.

Kemridge shrugged sourly. Dont be silly Justin. You know why were here, and you know how come were here. This isnt any time to

All right, Marner said. I take it all back. He stared for a moment at his delicate, tapering fingersthe fingers that could have belonged to a surgeon, were they not the property of a top-rank technical engineer. Dont pay any attention to whatever I just said. Its the strain thats getting me.

The door of the cabin chimed melodiously.

Come in, said Kemridge.

The door slid open and a Domerangi, clad in a bright yellow sash, gray-green buskins, and a glittering diadem of precious gems, stepped heavily into the cabin. He extended two of his five leathery tentacles in welcome.

Hello, gentlemen. I see youve come through the trip in fine shape.

Whats going on now, Plorvash? Marner asked.

The ship has landed at a spaceport just outside the city, the alien said. Ive come to take you to your quarters. Were giving you two the finest accommodations our planet can offer. We want your working conditions to be of the best.

Glad to hear it. Marner flicked a glance at his companion. Theyre most considerate, arent they, Dave?

The taller of the two Earthmen nodded gravely. Definitely.

Plorvash grinned. Suppose you come with me now. You would like to be well rested before you undertake your task. After all, you should be at your best, since planetary pride is at stake.

Of course, Marner said.

The test will begin as soon as you wish. May I offer you good luck?

We wont need it, Kemridge stated grimly. Its not a matter of luck at all. Its brainsbrains and sweat.

Very well, Plorvash said. This is what youre here to prove. It ought to be amusing, in any casewhatever the outcome may be.

Both Earthmen tried to look calm and confident, absolutely sure of themselves and their skill.

They merely managed to look rigidly worried.

Statisticians have no records on the subject, but it is an observed phenomenon that the most serious differences of opinion generally originate in bars. It had been in a bar at 46th Street and Sixth Avenue that Justin Marner had ill-advisedly had words with a visiting Domerangi, a month before, and it had been in the same bar that the train of events that had brought the two Earthmen to Domerang V had startedand never stopped gaining momentum.

It had been a simple altercation at first. Marner had been reflectively sipping a whisky sour, and Kemridge, seated to his left with his long legs uncomfortably scrunched up, had been toying with a double Scotch. The Domerangi had entered the bar with a characteristically ponderous stride.

Though contact with Domerang V had been made more than a century before, Domerangi were still rare sights in New York. Marner and Kemridge knew this one, thoughhe was attached to the Domerangi Consulate on 66th Street and Third, and they had had dealings with him a year ago in the matter of some circuit alignments for the buildings lighting system. Domerangi, with their extraordinary peripheral vision, prefer subdued, indirect lighting, and Marner and Kemridge had designed the lighting plot for the Consulate.

The Domerangi spotted them immediately and eased his bulk onto the stool next to them. Ah, the two clever engineers, the alien rumbled. You remember me, of course?

Yes, Marner said quickly. Hows the lighting job working out?

As well as could be expected. The Domerangi waved toward the bartender. Barkeep! Two beers, please.

What do you mean by that? Kemridge demanded as the beers were drawn and set on the bar.

Just one moment, please. The alien curled two tentacles gently around the beers and poured one into each of the two feeding-mouths at the sides of his face. Marvelous liquid, your beer. The one point where Earth is clearly superior to Domerang is in brewing.

To get back to the lights Kemridge prodded.

Oh, yes, the alien said. The lights. Well, theyre a pretty fair jobas good as we could have hoped for from a second-rate technology.

Now hold on a minute! Marner said hotly, and that was how it started.

I wish wed kept our mouths shut, Marner said glumly. He stared balefully at the spotless ceiling of the hotel room in which the Domerangi had installed them.

Kemridge whirled and glared down at the smaller man. Listen, Justin: were here and were going to show them up and go home rich and famous. Got that?

Okay, Marner said. He ran a finger along his thin lower lip. Im sorry I keep popping off like this. But it does seem screwy to have gone to this extent just to prove a point that came up in a barroom debate.

I know. But we wouldnt have come here if the State Department hadnt heard about the argument and thought it needed settling. The Domerangi have been acting lordly about their technology as long as weve known them. I think its a great idea to send a couple of honest-to-Christmas Terran engineers up here to show them once and for all whos got what it takes.

But suppose we dont show them?

We will! Between the two of us, we can match anything they throw at us. Cant we?

Marner smiled gloomily. Sure we can, he said without conviction. I havent doubted it for one minute.

Kemridge walked to the door and, with a swift searching motion of his fingers, found the plate that covered the door mechanism. He unclipped it.

Look in here, for example, he said, after a moments scrutiny. Simple cybernetic mechanism. I dont quite figure the way this green ceramic relay down here controls the power flow, but its nothing we couldnt dope out, given a screwdriver and a little spare time.

Marner stood on tiptoes and peered in. Perfectly understandable gadget, be commented. Not nearly as efficient as our kind, either.

Thats just the point, Kemridge said. These Domerangi arent half the sharks they think they are. We stipulated that we could duplicate anything they gave us, right? With our natural savvy and a little perspiration, we ought to be able to match the best gadget they test us with. If we follow through up here and those two Domerangi engineers on Earth mess up their half of the test, then weve done it. The State Departments counting on our versatility. Thats all we need, Justincleverness!

Marners eyes lit up. Dave, Im sorry I was so pig-headed a minute ago. Well give them the business, all right!

He stood up a little higher and gingerly extended a hand into the gaping servomechanism in the wall.

What are you doing? Kemridge asked.

Never mind. Get on the phone and tell Plorvash that well be ready to get to work tomorrow. While youre doing that, I want to fool with this relay. Might as well get some practice now! He was radiant with new-found enthusiasm.

When Plorvash knocked on the door the following morning, the mood was still on them. They were clear-eyed, wide awake, and firmly convinced they could master any problem.

Whos there? Marner asked loudly.

Me, the Domerangi said. Plorvash.

Instantly the door flew open and the dumbfounded alien charge daffaires was confronted with the sight of the two Earthmen still snug in their beds. He peered behind the door and in the closet.

Who opened the door? he asked suspiciously.