BAREFOOT DOCTOR
TWISTED FABLES
FOR TWISTED MINDS
This will either heal you or make you go insane
Barefoot Doctor, Stephen Russell 2017
First published by Element in 2003
This edition published by Wayward Published Ltd 2017
www.waywardpublications.com
Wayward Publications Ltd.,
4/3 Richmond Place,
Edinburgh.
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The moral right of Stephen Russell aka Barefoot Doctor to be asserted as the author of this work has been asserted in accordance with the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988.
All Rights reserved.
No part of this publication may be reproduced or transmitted in any form by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopy, recording or any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Publisher
Cover design Spanky Pymm
EPub ISBN 978-1-912062-20-1
Mobi ISBN 978-1-912062-21-8
AZW3 ISBN 978-1-912062-22-5
PDF ISBN 978-1-912062-23.2
British Library Cataloguing-in Publication Data
A catalogue record for this book is available on request from the British Library
For Jake
A word from the author
This is a reprinted updated version of Twisted Fables for Twisted Minds, though we still welcome any feedback on references, items or chunks that need updating in your opinion as we can adjust manuscript mid-flightand in return the author will reward you with an acknowledgment in the revised version.
Barefoot Doctor 2017
FOREWORD
by Dr Squid Gridlo, Philosopher
When first approached by Barefoot Doctor to write the foreword to this collection of fables, on account of his reputation I was, of course, flattered.
On the initial read-through I was amused and bewildered.
On the second run-through, although I still had some mild feelings of queasiness and disorientation, I was starting to wonder if there wasn't perhaps something in what he was saying.
By the third time round, I was forced to admit, bemusedly, that this collection of loosely-woven histories of a group of highly bizarre individuals was in fact of the utmost profundity and importance to the world.
What initially appeared as utter nonsense, suddenly came alive to me as a living metaphor for the absolute absurdity of the so-called real-life stories of the countless people I have had the privilege of drawing into conversation, during the course of my extensive travels on this crazy planet.
Though not being given naturally to contemplating matters of the spirit, being more of a pragmatist by disposition, I found myself being transformed incrementally and exponentially with each passing parable by the certain knowledge of one thing, which finds its exegesis so eloquently facilitated in these pages.
This, namely, that the only constant factor in all known existence is change. Furthermore, that change is unpredictable by nature. It is only in the acceptance of being in the state of not knowing what comes next, that one finds enlightenment and hence joy in the absolutely unfathomable mystery of life and death.
These fables, each allegedly based faithfully on snippets of true occurrences, all cut and pasted anarchically together, will at first seem totally unbelievable. That is for sure. However, when you stop for a moment to reflect on the truly ridiculous stories of those you meet along the way as you wander this great thoroughfare of life, you may well begin to wonder who's the more crazy: you, or Barefoot Doctor.
In the end, you'll probably agree with me that we're all of us inmates in this loony bin we've created here on Earth, and it is for this precise reason I am proud to provide this foreword to what can only be described as a totally insane text, and hope you derive as much pleasure and benefit from it as I have.
Dr Squid Gridlo, Lucerne, Switzerland 2003
AUTHOR'S BRIEF INTRODUCTION
Twisted Fables for Twisted Minds is an unlikely expedition into the deeper realms of the human psyche. It deals radically with the theme of quantum personal transformation, something occurring with greater and greater frequency and intensity in people's lives at this time, as the thrust for evolution accelerates against a backdrop of impending catastrophe.
In this book I use the age-old teaching device of distracting your thinking mind through the telling of fables (always stronger in impact on your psyche than fact), causing you to enter a mild, childlike trance state wherein you find yourself quite happy to suspend critical judgement just long enough (for a barefoot doctor) to pop a series of nuggets of potentially precious transformative data into your personal circuitry, which will contribute immediately (it is hoped) to your spiritual, mental, emotional, physical and material wellbeing, in a far more efficacious way than would happen if you simply read a straight-ahead self- help manual.
Read the fables as twisted fiction with a moral, or read them as entertaining self-help, it doesn't mattereither way you risk profoundly disturbing the status quo of your mind, but nothing worthwhile ever occurs in this life without a bit of disturbance preceding it and the personal pay off could be hugefor both of us.
Of course some of the characters you'll relate to, some you won't. By the same token, some of them won't relate to you either, but that's life and let's not get silly about thisthe important thing is that when you recognize yourself in any of the characters, you learn to love yourself, or at least like yourself more as a result.
These fables are inspired by the 'miracle' of healing that comes to every life at the most unexpected moments and in the most unlikely ways. May it come to you at precisely the moments you need it most, in the ways that suit you best, and may all limitations to your perfect peace, fulfillment, moment-to-moment satisfaction and contentment, whether self-imposed or apparently otherwise, be instantaneously and incrementally removed with every passing word.
Barefoot Doctor, Eastern Catalunya, 2003
WARNING: This is self-help as you've never seen it beforeit may give rise to uncontrollable random bouts of existential levity. Not to be used while driving, cycling or operating heavy machinery. Not to be taken internally. If in doubt, seek medical advice. Always read with care!
This will either heal you or make you go insane.
Brandell Willard, a lost young man with large ears and unruly features, was about to top himself. Everything was going wrong in his life. Just as he was going to leap off Suicide Bridge, a being (maybe an angel, maybe a barefoot doctor), grabbed his arm.
'Stop young fella. Reality as you experience it, is an illusion, a trick of the light, merely a series of impressions you're holding on to. If it's too painful, simply change your perception and you will change the very nature and structure of reality itself.'
'It's not reality that messes me up,' replied Brandell, 'it's other people letting me down. How can I change other people?'
'You can't, but you can change the energy you're putting out, which in turn will change the way people treat you. That's the Wayward Taoist approach,' replied the kindly being.
Brandell heard all this but jumped anywaystupid sod.
If you want to make a change in your life, try this: As you breathe in, gather up the essence of all the doubt, worry, anxiety and negativity within you. As you breathe out, expel that existential dross from yourself. As you breathe in again, let in the new good coming your way, which will appear for you right now in an appropriate mix of warmth, abundance, color and light.
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