Frances Bontrager Greaser - And a time to die: the pain and love of a journey home with AIDS

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title	:	And a Time to Die : The Pain and Love of a Journey Home With AIDS
author	:	Greaser, Frances Bontrager.
publisher	:	Herald Press
isbn10 | asin	:	0836190289
print isbn13	:	9780836190281
ebook isbn13	:	9780585262994
language	:	English
subject	Greaser, David L.,--d. 1991--Health, AIDS (Disease)--Patients--United States--Biography.
publication date	:	1995
lcc	:	RC607.A26G6354 1995eb
ddc	:	362.1/969792/0092
subject	:	Greaser, David L.,--d. 1991--Health, AIDS (Disease)--Patients--United States--Biography.

Page 3 And a Time to Die The Pain and Love of a Journey Home with Aids Frances Bontrager Greaser

Page 4 Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data Greaser, Frances Bontrager, 1921 And a time to die / Frances Bontrager Greaser. p. cm. ISBN 0-8361-9028-9 (alk. paper) 1. Greaser, David L., d. 1991Health. 2. AIDS (Disease) PatientsUnited StatesBiography. I. Title. RC607.A26G6354 1995 362.1'969792'0092dc20 [B] 95-16634 CIP The paper used in this publication is recycled and meets the minimum requirements of American National Standard for Information SciencesPermanence of Paper for Printed Library Materials, ANSI Z39.48-1984. Grateful acknowledgment is made to Frances and Lawrence Greaser for photos of David, family, and friends used on the cover and throughout this book. Excerpt from "When It Is Over," by Edna St. Vincent Millay is from Collected Poems, Harper Collins. Copyright 1954, 1982 by Norma Millay Ellis. Reprinted by permission of Elizabeth Barnett, literary executor. All Bible quotations are used by permission, all rights reserved, and are from The Holy Bible, New International Version, copyright 1973, 1978, 1984 International Bible Society, Zondervan Bible Publishers. AND A TIME TO DIE Copyright 1995 by Herald Press, Scottdale, Pa. 15683 Published simultaneously in Canada by Herald Press, Waterloo, Ont. N2L 6H7. All rights reserved Library of Congress Catalog Number: 95-16634 International Standard Book Number: 0-8361-9028-9 Printed in the United States of America Cover and book design by Paula M. Johnson 03 02 01 00 99 98 97 96 95 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1

Page 5 To all those parents who agonize as they watch their child struggle, hope, despair, and eventually cede to an untimely death. And to Lawrence, the co-caregiver, my strong support, lover, and primary editor.

Page 7 Contents Author's Preface 9 Prayer for Parents of Persons with AIDS 11 1. St. Vincent's Hospital 17 2. While It Was Yet Dark 32 3. David 48 4. D-Day 66 5. What Makes Them Do That? 75 6. Mother Number Two 87 7. Living with AIDS 95 8. AIDS and the Faith Community 112 9. Doubts and Faith 120 10. And a Time to Die 124 11. Afterword 131 Appendix 1: Caring for a PWA 142 Appendix 2: Uncle David, by Aaron Greaser 153 The Author 158

Page 9 Author's Preface All journeys are personal ones. Some are painful. The journey of walking with a loved one who has AIDS is one of plateaus, peaks, and valleys. The road is sometimes tortuous and agonizing. But there is an emotional bonding which is sustaining throughout the pilgrimage. Through it all, a sacred light guides and shines on the path ahead. This is the story of our journey with our forty-two year-old son David, who was HIV-positive long before we knew it. In 1988 he was critically ill and diagnosed as having AIDS. He died three years later. We treasure the gifts he gave usgenerosity, respect, sensitivity, gratitude, and his continued searching for faith and meaning. We value his showing us the importance of hope. In dying, he taught us how to live. We are grateful that he came to us and allowed us more intimately to touch his life during the dark moments when his life's journey was ending.

Page 10 We value the blessing of the friendships which upheld us during that early winter of his life. In that upholding they strengthened us. We were not alone. Dave's story has many heroes. Like the many biblical characters who, though unnamed, made a major contribution in the unfolding of the greatest of all love stories, so David's heroes, though unnamed, have played a significant role in the last phase of his life's journey. God will bless them where we cannot.

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