Neil R. Bockian Ph.D. - New Hope for People with Borderline Personality Disorder: Your Friendly, Authoritative Guide to the Latest in Traditional and Complementary Solutions

Other Books in the N EW H OPE Series

New Hope for Couples with Infertility Problems
New Hope for People with Alzheimers and Their Caregivers
New Hope for People with Bipolar Disorder
New Hope for People with Depression
New Hope for People with Diabetes
New Hope for People with Fibromyalgia
New Hope for People with Lupus
New Hope for People with Weight Problems

Copyright 2002 by Prima Publishing, a division of Random House, Inc.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage or retrieval system, without written permission from Random House, Inc., except for the inclusion of brief quotations in a review.

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Originally published by Prima Publishing, Roseville, California, in 2002.

In order to protect their privacy, the names of some individuals cited in this book have been changed.

WarningDisclaimer

This book is not intended to provide medical advice and is sold with the understanding that the publisher and the author are not liable for the misconception or misuse of information provided. The author and Random House, Inc., shall have neither liability nor responsibility to any person or entity with respect to any loss, damage, or injury caused or alleged to be caused directly or indirectly by the information contained in this book or the use of any products mentioned. Readers should not use any of the products discussed in this book without the advice of a medical professional.

Illustrations by Laurie Baker-McNeile

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Bockian, Neil R.
New hope for people with borderline personality disorder : your friendly, authoritative guide to the latest in traditional and complementary solutions / Neil R. Bockian, Nora Elizabeth Villagran, Valerie Porr.
p. cm.(New hope)
1. Borderline personality disorderPopular works. I. Villagran, Nora Elizabeth. II. Porr, Valerie. III. Title. IV. New hope series.
RC569.5B67 B63 2001
616.85852dc21

2001036979

eISBN: 978-0-307-80920-9

v3.1

To my parents, Fred and Sandra Bockian
for everything you have done and
for everything you are.

F EW THINGS ARE more satisfying to an old professor than to see one of his most promising pupils prove that his estimation of the students high potential has achieved fruition. So it is with this books author; the young professor, Dr. Neil Bockian, has undertaken scholarly professional work and highly useful writings such as this superb volume in the N EW H OPE series for people who are seeking an authoritative guide to understanding and resolving one of societys most distressing of disorders, the borderline personality. My favorite piece of advice to brilliant students is that they do well by doing good, that is, utilize their exceptional skills and knowledge for the benefit of others. And so it is again with Dr. Bockian; he has drawn upon his unusual talents to provide a book intended explicitly to help others deal with their own emotional difficulties or to help those with the disorder in their families.

And what a fine and useful book it is, a highly informed and sensitive portrayal of the borderline disorder, its origins and its understanding, as well as the practical steps that may be undertaken to ameliorate its expression and its consequences.

The conception of books for the intelligent and concerned layman written by professionals is a beautiful idea. We have all heard the complaint by the lay public that they are not privy to the thinking and research of the scientific community, that those who are most affected by emotional disorders are not able to share in the controversies and subtleties of the ailments they themselves must live with. So much of what is known professionally has limited utility by virtue of not being made available to those who could benefit most directly from this knowledge. Professionals should not disparage the efforts of the public to learn about their disparate and often divergent views. How different are we from shamans and quacks of yesteryear who cloaked their mysterious potions behind a veil of verbal mumbo-jumbo and esoteric secrecy?

Dr. Bockian has drawn on the thoughtful work of numerous theorists and clinicians to help the lay reader understand the typical features of this problematic disorder. Written with a grace and simplicity that any caring person can follow and appreciate, this book will serve as a source of comfort and guidance to all involved with borderline personality disorder.

Each chapter of the book focuses on one of several major areas of useful information, from answers to questions posed by the novice, matters of diagnostic accuracy, psychotherapeutic procedures, and alternative medicines to numerous methods that can be undertaken by instituting wise lifestyle changes (for example, nutrition and exercise), as well as steps that families can employ fruitfully. Especially fascinating is the chapter contributed by coauthor Valerie Porr, which recounts the experiences of the families of borderline patients. In short, Professor Bockian has organized and highlighted this impressive guidebook in an intriguing manner, including numerous fascinating case materials throughout. I am especially pleased by the balance and open-mindedness he has shown among diverse treatment viewpoints. It is assuredly a landmark work that will prove of inestimable value to patients, families, and their therapists.

To say that I am proud of this book is an understatement. More important, those who read it will be pleased by how helpful a guide it is in their struggle to overcome the borderline syndrome.

Theodore Millon, Ph.D., D.Sc.,
dean and scientific director, Institute for Advanced Studies in Personology and Psychopathology

I N MANY WAYS , the writing of this book parallels the process of coming to terms with borderline personality disorder. There came a point when I realized that I could not do it alone. I needed to write about medication, as well as numerous alternative therapies, much of which fell outside my formal training. For years, I had been trained as a scientific writer, a style inappropriate for the people we are hoping to reach with this book. By reaching out and connecting with others, I gained strength, wisdom, and clarity.

My two coauthors added to this book in immeasurable ways. Valerie Porr is the most passionate person regarding borderline personality disorder that I have ever met. Her energy, enthusiasm, and perspective added to this book in ways that go far beyond , which she wrote; Valerie and I discussed the majority of this book and her insights were invaluable. Gifted writing expert Nora Villagran helped to bring my ideas to life. I am accustomed to dry, technical writing; I needed Noras input to turn this into a living, breathing text.

I am deeply indebted to the editors at Prima/Random House who made this work possible. I worked most closely with Marjorie Lery, whose positive attitude and deep understanding of the process authors undergo helped me to feel understood and supported throughout the process. Susan Silva, the acquisition editor, was my first contact with Prima and was very helpful in the early stages of the project. Jamie Miller was extremely effective and efficient in her oversight of this project, and she found numerous ways to make this a better book. I am also indebted to my colleague Bernie Golden, Ph.D., who facilitated my involvement with Prima and this project.