Jon Levy - Youre Invited

To the love of my life,

you are my star,

you are my fire.

To all those who have cooked me dinner.

I have known no greater privilege than sharing moderately edible

meals with you and having washed dishes together.

The Influence Equation, Weight Watchers, American Anti-Slavery Society, the Influencers Dinner, and What This Book Is About

Addiction, Social Pain, Sardinia, and the Greatest Predictor of Longevity

The Good Doctor, the Trust Project, and the Importance of Benevolence

Marine Boot Camp, Gino the Salesman, the Halo Effect, Sororities, IKEA, Vulnerability Loops, and the Moral Molecule

Indian Retirement Home, the Hummingbird Problem, the Greatest Art Heist in History, and the Mere Exposure Effect

The Levels of Influence

Oprah and The Color Purple; the Success of TED; and the Importance of Generosity, Novelty, Curation, and Awe

Red Bull and Skills, Opportunities, Access, and Resources

Providing Belonging

The South African Springboks and Feeling Like You Are on the Inside

Wikipedia and Having a Say

ConBody and Succeeding After Prison

The Origin of Comic-Con and the Hero We Needed

Predicting Human Behavior, Criminal Minds, Walt Disney World, the Economist, and the Elephant and the Rider

UCLA Gymnastics, Discovery Engagement and Membership, and the Aesthetic Scentability Brunch

CreativeMornings; Flagships, Offshoots, and Large Gatherings; and the Finite and Infinite Game

Salesforce and How and When to Design Dinners, Parties, Conferences, and Events

The National Multiple Sclerosis Society, the End of Galas, and How to Connect with Donors and Supporters

The Google Puzzle, Recruiting, Employment, and How to Increase Retention and Attract the Best Talent

Games Night, Ernest Shackleton, and Your New Friends

Reimagining Events, Meetup.com, and Gifts from Reddit

Daryl Davis, a Boogie Musician and His New Friend, and a Question for You

I t was the fall of 1961 and Jean Nidetch was having what she called a thin day. At five foot seven and 214 pounds, the thirty-eight-year-old self-described housewife from Queens, New York, was, by her view, the view of her neighbors, and the view of practically everyone other than her loving husband, overweight. Dressed in a size 44 muumuu that she relabeled a size 20 in an effort to make herself feel better about her proportions, she went to the supermarket to pick up groceries. As she checked out, she felt the need to assure the clerk that all the boxes of cookies were for her kids, but the truth was that Jean would hide them in the bathroom, where she would binge eat entire boxes at night. As she strolled the supermarket aisles, an acquaintance complimented her on how great she looked. Jean welcomed the kind words, and then the woman added: When are you due? Jean was mortifiedthe woman thought she was pregnant. When she got home, she looked in the mirror and promised herself to use those words as motivation to finally lose the weight. Jean believed that through self-control and determination alone, she would achieve her goal. She was wrong.

Anyone who has ever committed to a weight loss diet knows that hard work and self-control just arent enough. Jean had tried every outlandish plan to reach a healthy weight, from eating nothing but eggs or grapefruit, to starvation, to the latest celebrity fad she would read about in a magazine. She would always be able to knock off a few pounds, but the moment she reached for her favorite foods, she would overindulge, and the pounds would come back, often with a few extra. After years of this she realized that if she was going to lose the weight and keep it off, she needed a different approach. One year later Jean had lost seventy-two pounds, but what was truly exceptional is that over the next fifty-three years not only would she keep them off but she would help tens of millions of people around the world lose hundreds of millions of pounds, likely saving countless lives. In the process Jean Nidetch became a multimillionaire and an international celebrity, all in an era when her credit cards still said Mrs. Marty Nidetch. If you have ever heard of Weight Watchers International, its because Jean understood the importance of human connection and the community effect.

While Jean was an overweight housewife looking to get healthier, Frederick Baileys story couldnt have been more different. Though the stories are separated by over 120 years and are incomparable in their challenges and motivations, on closer examination you can see an incredibly powerful connection between the two. It was September 3, 1838, and to say that Frederick was anxious would be an understatement. As an escaped slave, he knew his life was on the line. If he were caught, he would be tortured, possibly shot, or torn apart by vicious dogs to be made an example of.

His plan was to avoid being noticed by jumping on the train just as it was leaving the station from Baltimore, Maryland, a slave state, to Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, a free state. Once on board, he would sit segregated with the other Black passengers in the negro car. He hoped that the jostle of the train and the busyness on board would prevent the conductor from noticing the discrepancies in his papers. This would be assuming he wasnt recognized by someone and captured or arrested at the border. To fool the conductor, Frederick managed to secure borrowed papers from a local free sailor, and to play the part, he dressed in sailor style with a red shirt, hat, and cravat. If he was lucky, the combination of papers, outfit, and his knowledge of ships (he was forced to work at a shipyard for some time) would be enough to throw off suspicion. When the conductor came, Frederick passed him papers with a prominent seal on them to demonstrate their authenticity. With hardly a look, the conductor moved on, and Frederick had made it through his first challenge. Over the next day he would go from train to ferry, to train, to steamboat landing at Philadelphia. At each port, he avoided the possibility of police or bounty capture and the numerous men who, with a long enough glance, would recognize him. After arriving in Philadelphia, he boarded one last train to New York, and by the next morning, he was a free man.

Three years later, Frederick, now going by the last name Douglass to avoid recapture, accepted an invitation to attend a meeting of the American Anti-Slavery Society (AASS). It was hosted by William Lloyd Garrison, the publisher of the abolitionist paper the Liberator and cofounder of the organization. Douglass was invited to share his story with the crowd. When Garrison heard Douglasss words, he immediately knew that Douglass could become an important figure in the movement. What Douglass could have never predicted that day was that thanks to the Influence Equation and the power of an invitation, two ideas we will explore in detail, his public speaking and writing would play a critical role in the movement to end slavery, the election of Abraham Lincoln, and the freedom he and his fellow Black men, women, and children deserved.

Jeans goal and the abolitionists goals were clearly different, which is why I chose their stories. They were separated not only by more than a century but also by race, religion, culture, and objectives. Jean was committed to the very personal struggle of helping people of all walks of life find health. After all, at least 2.8 million people die due to obesity-related issues every year. And the abolitionists were fighting for the social and moral obligation to give freedom and equality to humans in bondage. Even though their journeys and missions were incredibly different, what led them to succeed was the same thing: they found a way to bring people together and create deep and meaningful connections between them.