Copyright 2019, 2000 by Youth Communication and Project Resilience
All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. Unless otherwise noted, no part of the book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise, without express written permission of the publisher, except for brief quotations or critical reviews. For more information, go to freespirit.com/permissions.
Free Spirit, Free Spirit Publishing, and associated logos are trademarks and/or registered trademarks of Free Spirit Publishing Inc. A complete listing of our logos and trademarks is available at freespirit.com.
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Names: Desetta, Al, editor. | Wolin, Sybil, editor.
Title: The struggle to be strong : true stories by teens about overcoming tough times / edited by Al Desetta, M.A., for Youth Communication, Sybil Wolin, Ph.D.
Description: Updated Edition. | Minneapolis : Free Spirit Publishing Inc., [2019] | Revised edition of The struggle to be strong, 2000. | Audience: Ages 13+
Identifiers: LCCN 2019013641 (print) | LCCN 2019980440 (ebook) | ISBN 9781631984617 (pdf) | ISBN 9781631984600 (paperback) | ISBN 9781631984624 (epub) | ISBN 1631984608 (paperback) | ISBN 9781631984600(paperback) | ISBN 1631984608(paperback) | ISBN 9781631984624(epub) | ISBN 9781631984617(pdf)
Subjects: LCSH: TeenagersUnited StatesSocial conditionsCase studiesJuvenile literature. | Resilience (Personality trait) in adolescenceCase studiesJuvenile literature. | TeenagersUnited StatesConduct of lifeJuvenile literature. | TeenagersUnited StatesBiographyJuvenile literature.
Classification: LCC HQ796 (ebook) | LCC HQ796 .S874 2019 (print) | DDC 305.2350973dc23
LC record available at https://lccn.loc.gov/2019013641
Free Spirit Publishing does not have control over or assume responsibility for author or third-party websites and their content. At the time of this books publication, all facts and figures cited within are the most current available. All telephone numbers, addresses, and website URLs are accurate and active; all publications, organizations, websites, and other resources exist as described in this book; and all have been verified as of May 2019. If you find an error or believe that a resource listed here is not as described, please contact Free Spirit Publishing. Parents, teachers, and other adults: We strongly urge you to monitor childrens use of the internet.
Youth Communication is a registered trademark of Youth Communication.
How I Made Peace with the Past and The Answer Was Me (originally Facing the Problem) reprinted from The Heart Knows Something Different: Teenage Voices from the Foster Care System , by Youth Communication, copyright 1996 by Youth Communication/New York Center, Inc., by permission of Persea Books, Inc., New York. All rights reserved. How to Survive Shopping with Mom and Color Me Different reprinted from Starting with I: Personal Essays by Teenagers , by Youth Communication, copyright 1997 by Youth Communication/ New York Center, Inc., by permission of Persea Books, Inc., New York. All rights reserved. No One Spoke Up for Irma reprinted from Things Get Hectic: Teens Write About the Violence That Surrounds Them , by Youth Communication, copyright 1998 by Youth Communication/New York Center, Inc., by permission of Simon & Schuster, Inc., New York.
In the following stories, some names and/or identifying details have been changed: Im Black, Hes Puerto Rican... So What?, Not a Girl at All, Shes My Sister (Not Foster), Walking Out the Anger, No One Spoke Up for Irma, and I Was a Cyberbully.
The quotation in It Takes Work to Flirt is from 101 Ways to Flirt: How to Get More Dates and Meet Your Mate by Susan Rabin and Barbara Lagowski (New York: Plume, 1997).
Reading Level High SchoolAdult; Interest Level Ages 13 & Up;
Fountas & Pinnell Guided Reading Level Z+
Cover and interior design: Shannon Pourciau
Freelance editor: Bonnie Z. Goldsmith
Free Spirit Publishing Inc.
6325 Sandburg Road, Suite 100
Minneapolis, MN 55427-3674
(612) 338-2068
freespirit.com
Free Spirit offers competitive pricing.
Contact for pricing information on multiple quantity purchases.
To the teens at Youth Communication, who have courageously shared their stories of persistence in the face of adversity.
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
This book would not exist without the hard work, talent, and courage of the young writers whose stories give it life. They are part of a much larger group of young people at Youth Communication who have written about their lives since 1980. While we were able to include only thirty of the more than one hundred stories we considered for this book, we are moved and inspired by all of them.
From Al Desetta: I would like to thank Leah Weinman for her many insightful contributions to this project.
From Sybil Wolin: I would like to thank my husband, Steven Wolin, for daring to suggest that we write a book together and for his devotion during our work as coauthors. The Resilient Self , published by Villard Press in 1993, was the successful outcome of his suggestion. It is the source of the seven resiliencies that serve as the organizing principle of The Struggle to Be Strong .
I also would like to thank my granddaughter, Zoe, whose strength inspires me and affirms my commitment to the concept of psychological resilience.
We would like to thank Keith Hefner, cofounder and executive director of Youth Communication, for his support, guidance, and ideas.
Many foundations, corporations, and others support Youth Communications work to train teens to tell their stories. One anonymous donor in particular has supported our work to promote resilience. We deeply appreciate her support and insight.
The work that created The Struggle to Be Strong was also supported by the Child Welfare Fund, the DeWitt-Wallace Readers Digest Foundation, JP Morgan, the New York Community Trust, the New York Foundation, the Pinkerton Foundation, the Scherman Foundation, the WKBJ Partnership Foundation, the Ackman Family Fund, the Altman Foundation, the Annie Casey Foundation, the Stella and Charles Guttmann Foundation, the Bay Foundation, Bertelsman Music Group, the Booth Ferris Foundation, the Boyd Foundation, the Catalog for Giving, the Charles Hayden Foundation, Chase Manhattan Bank, Citibank, the Colin Higgins Foundation, Dress Barn, the Fund for the City of New York, the Yip Harburg Foundation, the Heckscher Foundation for Children, the Henry van Ameringen Foundation, the Kenworthy-Swift Foundation, Keyspan Energy, the Joseph E. Seagram and Sons, Inc. Fund, the Merchants & Traders Bank, Manhattan Borough Presidents Ruth Messinger and Virginia Fields, the Metzger-Price Fund, Morgan Stanley, the Samuel I. Newhouse Foundation, the City of New Yorks Department of Youth & Community Development, the New York Times Company Foundation, the Open Society Institute, the Paul Rapoport Foundation, the Public Welfare Foundation, the Rita and Stanley Kaplan Foundation, former New York State Senator Tom Duane, Time Warner, and the Valentine Perry Snyder Fund.
Several people read the manuscript and made important contributions: Chris Henrikson at the Dreamyard Drama Project in Los Angeles; Anthony Conelli, former director of Forsyth Satellite High School in New York and currently chair of the leadership department at the Bank Street Graduate School of Education; high school teacher Alison Koffler; and Tom Brown, the administrative director at Youth Communication.