Rebecca Fox Starr - Beyond the Baby Blues: Anxiety and Depression During and After Pregnancy

Rebecca Fox Starr is a writer, blogger, podcaster, and mental health advocate with an unyielding desire to help other mental health sufferers. Among her greatest accomplishments, Rebecca has used the success of her blog, Mommy, Ever After , to create a private, online forum for women in which they are able to open up about psychological and social issues that they would otherwise be too afraid to address. Her story has been featured in the New York Times , on ABC News, and in all forms of media across the world. Rebecca lives and writes with her husband, children, and Yorkie in the suburbs of Philadelphia. The Mommy, Ever After blog can be found at www.MommyEverAfter.com.

Published by Rowman & Littlefield

A wholly owned subsidiary of The Rowman & Littlefield Publishing Group, Inc.
4501 Forbes Boulevard, Suite 200, Lanham, Maryland 20706
www.rowman.com

Unit A, Whitacre Mews, 26-34 Stannary Street, London SE11 4AB

Copyright 2018 by Rowman & Littlefield

All rights reserved . No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without written permission from the publisher, except by a reviewer who may quote passages in a review.

British Library Cataloguing in Publication Information Available

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

Names: Fox Starr, Rebecca, 1985 author.

Title: Beyond the baby blues : anxiety and depression during and after pregnancy / Rebecca Fox Starr.

Description: Lanham : Rowman & Littlefield, [2018] | Includes bibliographical references and index.

Identifiers: LCCN 2017023086 (print) | LCCN 2017024659 (ebook) | ISBN 9781442273917 (electronic) | ISBN 9781442273900 (cloth : alk. paper)

Subjects: LCSH: Postpartum depression. | Postpartum depressionTreatment.

Classification: LCC RG852 (ebook) | LCC RG852 .F69 2018 (print) | DDC 618.7/6dc23

LC record available at https://lccn.loc.gov/2017023086

The paper used in this publication meets the minimum requirements of American National Standard for Information SciencesPermanence of Paper for Printed Library Materials, ANSI/NISO Z39.48-1992.

Printed in the United States of America

For my Kenny:
For seeing the light go out in my eyes, and then for bringing it back.

I am supremely grateful to many people for helping to make thismy dreaminto a reality. As I often say, my tribe is the best tribe; and this book, aimed at helping women, caregivers, and members of the healthcare community, is my cherished labor of love.

Thank you to my agent, the amazing and talented Rene C. Fountain, president of Gandolfo Helin & Fountain Literary Management agency. Rene, you believed in me and in this project, even with all of the twists, turns, curveballs, changes, and obstacles that have been thrown our way. You recognized my passion and supported me through every step of this journey, and I will be eternally grateful for your expertise, patience, and strength. Thank you to the rest of the team at Gandolfo Helin & Fountain for being an incredibly supportive community of writers, artists, and rabble-rousers.

Many thanks to the Rowman & Littlefield team. A huge thanks to my editor, Suzanne Staszak-Silva. Suzanne, you gave me the greatest gift with just one word: yes. I am so grateful that you turned this project into the bold, unique text that it is today, one that is packed with actionable advice about prenatal distress, setting us apart in this expansive industry. I know that, because of you, we will help to save other women from the pain that I endured. Thank you also to my production editor, Patricia Stevenson, for your kindness, patience, enthusiasm, and help.

Thank you to Dr. Judith Beck, who has supported me since day one of this project, sending me articles, giving me support, and introducing me to Dr. Amy Wenzel. Dr. Beck, you are a force of nature. And to Dr. Wenzel: I literally could not have done this without you. It has been an honor laughing, crying, and writing with you. You are a true expert in your field and we are so lucky to have your wisdom, experience, and case studies in this book. Thank you for your time, transparency, and talent.

Thank you to Mike Greenspoon, creative director of Brand Revive, for giving me a logo, an identity, and a website that I am proud to call my own. Thank you to Kimberly Ettinger, president of Pearl Communications, for supporting me every step of the way, helping me with my public relations goals, and teaching me how to properly use a hashtag.

I would not be here today if it were not for the Mommy, Ever After online support group, nicknamed #teamMEA. Ladies, you are the heart and soul of why I write. Thank you for sharing your darkest moments with me, for contributing to this project, and for giving us a collective voice. You are my why. We have been through some hard times, as a group, but never, ever, ever stop fighting. You are worth it. You deserve this. This book is for you.

I am so grateful for my treatment team. Thank you for holding my hand when Ive needed warmth, pushing me when Ive needed tough love, and never judging me for being who I am. I literally would not be here today without you.

And now, I say thank you to my family, both by chance and by choice. You have supported me as a writerand as a humanin more ways than I could ever name. Mom and Dad, you have instilled in me the value of helping others. That is why I am able to write the things that other people are afraid to put on paper. Thank you for holding my hand through the darkest of days and for never giving up on me or on this project. You have taught me about empathy, compassion, and unconditional love; you have made me into the parent that I am today. Emily, you inspire me with your work ethic, determination, and poise and I am so proud that you are my little sister. Speaking of sisters, thank you to my sisters of the soul. Each one of you holds a special place in my life, in my story, and in my heart. You know who you are. I love you ever so much.

Dear Kenny, you are my hero. We may have been to hell and back, but thankfully we can just look at it as another (short) trip on our long list of adventures together. You are my rock and my rock star. I feel blessed, each and every day, that I was wise enough at twenty years old to say yes to a date with the bad boy from around the corner. You never cease to amaze me with your strength, never stop stunning me with your compassion, and you have never given up on us, even in our darkest days. I will love you forever and I will like you for always.

Annabelle Lily and Alexander Beau: this is for you. Not just this book, but everything. Every word I write is for you two, as you make my heart beat, my soul sing, and my life worth living. There is no greater title on earth than being Belle and Beaus Mommy, as you are extraordinary people, whom I am so proud to call mine. Thank you for giving me endless material, an infinite amount of kisses, and a life that is filled with magic. You are my happily ever after.

E mergency rooms 3 and 4 were connected, but separated by a thin curtain that could be opened in order to create a makeshift suite. In room 4, in a stretcher that appeared humongous, lay my son, three days shy of being two months old. He was hooked up to an IV, had an oxygen monitor taped to his tiny toe, and was receiving a constant stream of oxygen through a tube in his nose. In room 3, I lay, dizzy and disoriented, chained to an IV pole and receiving my third bag of fluids. A nurse handed me a yellow pill. Potassium. She told me that I was deficient and to swallow.